is this reality or am I going mad

[I'mdave27]

Ok I don't think I'm going mad but I do have some worrying thoughts. They are worrying because they make me feel detached from reality , life and myself I have no idea why I have these thoughts I just do , not to my liking though. Myself and my fiance have just moved to a new house , yay , but our bedroom is right next to the main road which can be very noisy but it doesn't bother me because I can fall asleep easily , it's staying asleep that's the problem. So I don't know if I'm having these weird feelings as well as weird thoughts due to lack of sleep I'm not sure , maybe someone can enlighten me. I've been having thoughts where I think I shouldn't take life so seriously as it's all one big illusion and the things I think about on a daily basis are just thoughts that appear to be in my head , strange I know. These thoughts usually produce a very good feeling it's almost like being high because at the time I'm full of love and love everything and everyone but then... BOOM ! ANXIETY kicks in an hour later. I am on 40mg citalopram I'm also due to see the doctor on 31st December because my anxiety has been really bad lately. Any tips on what this is ?

[David Don]

Feeling of de-personalisation is a symptom of Anxiety. So don't worry about it too much. Read through he self help section - first steps and Coping. Might shed some light on a bit of your worries.

I also find that my knowledge of the nature of reality and mind does not have much effect on the reality of my anxiety. Anxiety is chemistry, its biology and its psycology. You may have feelings of euphoria one moment and feel confident that perhaps with this feelings you were currently having and the thoughts associated with it...will pull you out finaly out of the mist.

Then the stress chemicals already in your system kick in a while later and bring symptoms of anxiety. Its simple, the chemicals are having a biological effects on your body and your brain hence mind. You then feel disappointed. "Oh here it comes again..." Moreover some people seems to feel more anxious at certain times of the day.

The trick is not to let the anxiety itself get to you. Don't be disappointed. Accept it. You are anxious because of ..... Try and do some breathing exercises. The worst symptoms of anxiety is brought on by the worry over the initial anxiety symptoms. So ignore it. Do something you enjoy and it will slowly pass. Better still exercise it Away!

Oh yeah, you know the way you got yourself to be full of love and feeling of expansion, do it more often. Every day and night. Expand on the positive thoughts and apply to your life. You see the way your thoughts brought about a response from your body and mind to feel euphoric...Well the opposite of that process is what brings on anxiety, negative focus of thoughts and catastrophising. So turn it around get used to thinking positive ideas. Life is like an illusion according to buddhism because of the way we are used to experience it. Explore this ideas in buddhism if you haven't already.

Enjoy your xmass holiday. Best Regards

[harasgenster]

'I shouldn't take life too seriously' is a GOOD thing. The thoughts are just thoughts and when I first started to think this way I also felt 'high' - but it was more like 'oh my God I'm free!'

Then anxiety would kick in.

Then I'd go back to feeling good.

It's part of recovery, but it's also part of citalopram as that was how I felt when I was first on citalopram.

If it feels like too much of a rollercoaster, speak to your GP because your dose may be too high.

[matwsij]

I agree entirely with harasgenter.