Back again, this time it's back pain:)

[St3v3n]

Hi all, haven't posted in sometime as health has been bumbling along at an okay level for last while. I've really just been popping in reading a post or two and playing the little games when I can't sleep or have things on my mind. However just prior to Xmas I returned to work(previously stay at home dad). All I could get was pretty physical work in a warehouse stripping boxes of pallets and loading them onto a conveyor belt. Naturally Xmas period was very busy so had long hours and few breaks. My back is now painful all over and usually I wake with pain somewhere around 4 or 5am. Nothing too surprising in that really but I find when things are going wrong they just consume me, It almost feels like claustrophobia. Have turned to all the wrong places for advice, poor souls with years of crippling back pain behind them etc. all the stuff to really snap me out of it. Was really getting to me last night so went for a mood lifting walk around the block, ended up sobbing like a broken hearted teenager:). Back looking after the kiddies for the next two weeks while my wife is at Uni and feel I am failing them miserably. Anyway sorry to pass on my burdens, I know there are likely people out there with truly debilitating long term back pain and I must come across as very tiresome. Christian(my 5 year old) has just informed me that's it's lunch time despite just finishing his breakfast so will head off now. Again I'm sorry for being so self absorbed, I truly wish I was a different person. I'm sure I'd look at these little physical set backs that we all encounter in a more balanced light and likely get better all the quicker. Thanks to all that get to the end of my little message your patience is greatly appreciated.
Warm regards to all,

Steven (Christian and Sophia)

[barbn]

Back pain is the worst!!! I haven't read any of your previous posts - did you have an injury to your back in the past? Have you had it checked out? And there is no shame in having a good cry...and as for failing your children...I have felt like that so many times while I was raising my daughter. And she said to me the other day "mom, I don't really remember any of those bad times - mostly just the good times we had"....point is, in the grand scheme of things....those kids are going to love you no matter what - even through some bad times. So hang in there....this is a small part of your big life and you will get through this!

[St3v3n]

Hi Barbn, thank you so much for your thoughtful reply. I think if I'm being rational it's just painful due to the work I've been doing. Have been to physio and my dr and they don't seem too concerned. Dr was kind enough to send me for X-rays which I showed to my physio yesterday. Again they said it all looked normal. Well pop into my dr later this week as the full report will be in but I'm not expecting any dire news. It just seems like when I get a small physical/ psychological set back I can't see to the other side of it. I just seem to feel it's the way things now are, or what if the pain never goes away-all very silly I suppose. Feels a bit self absorbed as I'm sure there are people on this site with some really nasty back injuries too. Have been trying to save the tears for the end of the day when I go for a walk on my own to spare the kiddies so shall just plod along I suppose. Thanks again for taking the time to read my little story and offering some comforting thoughts it was very kind.
Warm regards,
Steven

[St3v3n]

Diazepam taken now off to bed. :) hoping for the best. Night all my fellow worriers!