View Full Version : Asking for Prayer.....(Cancer-sensitive)
TooMuchToLiveFor
17-01-14, 04:35
Hey NMP Friends,
As many of you may know I have been fighting the Anxiety Dragon for awhile now....., and in the process I have grown close to those here at NMP.
My mom had a radical mastectomy (meaning they had to remove breast, ribs, and part of the chest wall) two months ago. They think the cancer has been completely removed...., but the problem is- she is not healing. They are going in tomorrow to completely redo her reconstruction again. This will be her fourth surgery. They are going to have to remove muscle and skin from her back to try to get a workable repair on the front. It is very invasive. She is beyond weary, frail, and scared. She is down to about 86 pounds.
I am writing because I am starting to spiral a bit tonight.
I am especially writing because I wanted to ask if anyone inclined would lift my mom up in prayer tonight, tomorrow morning, and throughout the next days for successful healing. Her name is Jeanne. She is the most selfless person I have probably every met. She is my mama. I love her so much.
Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
---------- Post added at 22:35 ---------- Previous post was at 22:33 ----------
Oh, and I hope this isn't insensitive, but I am anxious about receiving any replies that could make my anxiety even worse. Positive posts only pretty please.
TooMuchToLiveFor
17-01-14, 11:51
Getting ready to head to the hospital. Could use some encouragement.
Big hugs for you :hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs:
One of my relatives has a prayer list at the church they go to so I will ask them to put your Mum's name on it so that they can all pray for her.
TooMuchToLiveFor
17-01-14, 12:04
Oh, Annie! Thank you so much! I truly do believe in the power of prayer, and knew I could reach out to my community here! Your reply and the fact that you would add her to that list means so much. Thank you again! :hugs:
Please keep me up to date on how your Mum is doing. I know this must be a terrible time for you with your anxiety too. :hugs::hugs::hugs:
xBettyBoopx
17-01-14, 12:37
I am praying for your mum :bighug1:
Good Morning Too Much. I understand totally what you're going through and how worried that you must be. I will certainly say a prayer for your Mom, Jeanne, throughout the day. You continue to take good care of yourself, so you can be there for her. If you need to chat, give a shout. Know that I will be thinking of you today.
MRS STRESS ED
17-01-14, 13:12
You will both be in my prayers ,I no how cancer effects everyone sadly I lost a family member last year god bless you both xxxxxxxxxxxx
TooMuchToLiveFor
17-01-14, 17:37
Thank you, thank you all!
I am right this moment working myself away from a panic attack. Mom has now been in surgwry an hour and a half longer than they told us she would be. Freaking out and imagining to many tv scenarios. Please help me get some rational thoughts fast!
It is awful waiting for someone to come out of surgery. This happened when my son had major surgery and I panicked so much. They had only told me the actual surgery time though and not the prep time and time in recovery. I hope you get news about your Mum soon. Are you alone or do you have someone with you?
TooMuchToLiveFor
17-01-14, 17:57
Hi, Annie- thanks for being there for me right now. I am with my Dad.
We know the surgery started at 811am. It was supposed to be an hour and a half to two hours, but it's been almost four and she is still in the OR.
Ugh.
So how's it going right now, Too Much? Any word on your Mom and her surgery.
Are you able to ask a nurse if they know what is happening and how much longer it may be? The waiting time is the worst. I am pleased you and your dad have each other for support. :hugs::hugs:
You are in my thoughts and prayers. Xx
MRS STRESS ED
17-01-14, 23:25
Hi TooMuchToLiveFor how did things go, hope it all went well in my prayers xxxx
TooMuchToLiveFor
18-01-14, 01:54
Hello, dear friends,
First, thank you so much. It is very interesting to me how much I have come to rely on my NMP friends, and how close I feel to this community. The concern today truly means so much.
Well, the surgeon came and got us right at the four hour mark. As I mentioned earlier, it was only supposed to be an hour and a half or two hours. The liaisons that update the waiting room families were very busy today, so in that last two hours we couldn't get any information as to what was going on, and why she was in surgery so long.
There were some complications to her surgery. I hesitate to go into detail as I don't have HA, and don't want to say anything that could cause someone any additional anxiety. The surgeon said that he is hoping all works this time and thinks it will, but because of the complications there is about a ten percent chance that she will need yet another surgery. (This is her third since the mastectomy to try to get the reconstruction to take!) By the time I left tonight, he said that the area was starting to look good and he is very hopeful it will be a success!
And, although there were some close calls- the anxiety dragon is tucked back away in the small room she still occupies inside of me. Not repressed, not avoided.....just sleeping in the small space I allow her to occupy why she continues to shrink.
Today as my chest was hurting, my heart was pounding, the tingles, pins and needles, and tremors were raging away-- I had a different reaction than I would have even a few weeks ago. I wasn't scared that I was going to have a panic attack. Of course, I didn't want to, but I wasn't worried about it. The physical sensations didn't even bother me that much- maybe because I was feeling them in a situation that should naturally cause me to be anxious instead of times I shouldn't feel them- like when I am just trying to play Candy Land with my little boy.
The thing that bothered me was I was afraid my anxiety would "come back." I have been doing so well, and the fact that I was feeling more anxiety today was scary for the future......, but, yet, I wasn't scared for the present moment wherein I was actually feeling anxiety. So, I will take one day at a time and not worry about the future. The dragon deceivingly looks much bigger when I look at the future, but in the here and now- she is actually quite small.
I am so pleased to hear that your Mum got through surgery okay even though it was a bit more complicated. Hopefully everything will heal as it should this time.
In situations were any one would be anxious, like this one, it is often a fear that the anxiety will stay. You sound very rational to your thoughts on this so I am sure you will get through it. :hugs::hugs:
Sounds like you handled the stressors of the day great, Too Much. Fearing that the anxiety will come back full force is a normal worry. Anyone would have felt anxious over yesterday's surgery for your Mum. People without anxiety disorders wouldn't have given the thought of the anxiety hanging around another thought. The key is to keep right on feeling the fear and doing everything that you need to do anyway.
Keep utilizing the tools that you've put in your Dragon Slayers Kit daily. That doesn't stand a chance.
I'm glad that they are hopeful that the surgery was successful.
Prayer coming your way :hugs:
TooMuchToLiveFor
18-01-14, 16:52
Tanner, Mermaid, Annie, Mrs Stressed, and Mr.Andy,
THANK YOU!
I am so thankful to be able to reach out to you! My mom was very touched that there are people all over the country and world praying for her and supporting us!
How are each one of you today? (Annie and Mermaid, I know each of you have especially been struggling- how are you doing?)
I have had a better day today thank you. I have kept myself busy to chase the anxiety away :) xx
TooMuchToLiveFor
18-01-14, 17:59
Oh, I'm glad to hear it, Annie! :)
I feel a bit less "up" today than I have, but am trying to remember that "normal" people would feel this way today after such an intense day yesterday.
I hope you enjoy your evening! (Excuse my ignorance, but from which country is your flag? Is it Norway?)
Well done TooMuch on dealing with your mum's surgery and the stresses that go with it. You are an inspiration! Healing hugs to you and your mum. I found when my mum was ill last year that despite the anxiety I was able to do everything I needs to do at the time and the dragon well and truly shrivelled, it's as if auto pilot kicks in and the dragon can't cope.
I am finding this illness of mine very draining and playing havoc on m whole body. Am determined to go back to work on Monday - round 2! - hoping that because I did it the other week my anxiety will be less. Will just need to find a way of settling the after effects of the nasty bug.
My thoughts are with you.
Mermaid
TooMuchToLiveFor
18-01-14, 18:18
Mermaid-
Are you able to do the basics to help your body recover from the stomach bug? Hydration, soothing and nourishing foods, etc?
You will do just fine at work. Just let yourself float into a rhythm. Time will pass and you will be feeling where you were just a short time ago. I know you are going to be feeling good again soon!
My flag is England :) I live in the North East of England :)
Positive thoughts and prayers.... How's she doing?
MRS STRESS ED
19-01-14, 18:27
Tanner, Mermaid, Annie, Mrs Stressed, and Mr.Andy,
THANK YOU!
I am so thankful to be able to reach out to you! My mom was very touched that there are people all over the country and world praying for her and supporting us!
How are each one of you today? (Annie and Mermaid, I know each of you have especially been struggling- how are you doing?)
Aww bless you asking how we all are and you got so much on your mind ,I hope and pray your mum is on the mend xx take care
TooMuchToLiveFor
17-02-14, 22:32
Just checking in with a little update about my mom, and wanted to once again thank everyone who offered up prayers and love on her behalf…..
She is HEALING!!! The last reconstruction finally took. She has weaned off all of her pain medication, and she is getting ready to start her six week course of radiation. Believing in faith that this will be the final leg of her journey, and that she will never have to deal with this again. Also, praying that her "new normal" will settle in with some sense of ease. She has been through a war- but she has come through it.
Too much, your words have assisted others regarding the dragon and would be ignorant not to add my support and prayer to your mums surgery and healing process. Like you've done for many.
I'm pleased she's safely through surgery and pray that her healing process is seamless and quick. Hope that the love from your family and external surroundings empowers her speedy recovery. Thinking of Her.
TooMuchToLiveFor
17-02-14, 23:16
KLP-
Thank you so much for your kind words!!! I so appreciate your encouragement!!
(Oh, and I will soon be updating the dragon thread. ;) )
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