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[Samantha44]

Hello, I am a 44 year old women and have been very sad for the last few years. I have been in a vert unhappy relationship for 5 years so last year finally decided to do something about it.

I left and started renting a flat for me and my daughter. I thought that once I had taken myself away from the relationship I would be happy again. This just hasn't been the case. I cry all the time. I am constantly tired and just don't want to do anything.

I don't know what to do and how stop myself feeling so unhappy.

I have joint this website as I need to tell so someone how I feel as I am hiding it from all my family as they all think I should be happy now.

xxx

[Marty_67]

Hi Samantha and welcome to NMP.

I think you have been incredibly brave and by the sounds of it done absolutely the right thing. Nobody should stay in a relationship that is not working and I'll bet that you would be so much unhappier had you stayed with your ex-partner.

Have you made an appointment to see the doctor? I am not saying that you need meds but maybe you should talk to your GP about your feelings.

I was suffering until recently when things really came to a head. I have used meds before and they work for me. However, they only 'mask' the truth and should be used as a crutch rather than a permanent fix.

You will find plenty of support on here. We all all struggling against our various demons and the guys and gals on here will really help to lift you back up with plenty of tips and advice.

Do you have a friend or close family member you could confide in? Talking to people really helps me but then I am a very chatty person! I know you are lacking in energy, but I also find that getting out and doing stuff really helps (bit of a catch 22, I know). I also get a big lift out of helping others, my elderly nan or a friend that needs a car mended or furniture moved. Anything that can take your mind of 'stuff'. I now walk everywhere I can as a 'vent' for my adrenalin/anxiety. This has helped me.

I also have the support of a couple of trusted friends and that really helps.

Hope this message helps you and I hope things work out for you. Stay in touch and let us know how things go.

All the best,


Marty

[Samantha44]

Hello Marty, thanks for replying.

I have a friend in work who I talk to but I don't want to feel like I am burdening her with how I'm feeling. She is very good and listens to me. I just wish I could stop crying at the drop of a hat.

I have been avoiding going to the doctors as I have been on antidepressants years ago and don't really want to go back down that route.thar is why u have joined this site to see if just talking to others will help.

Regards, Samantha x

[Antonio2301]

:welcome: Samantha
I'm sure you find plenty of help on nmp and meet some very nice people along the way. I'm sure talking with others on the site will help . I do agree with the above poster Marty , if being in a relationship is making you unhappy then it's time to call it a day . It's not fair on the you , children or partner . It must of been hard for you making the decision I'm sure but yes you've done the right thing

I hope you one day find happiness again and am sure you will :bighug1:

Antonio

[Samantha44]

Hello Antonio,

Thank you for replying. I know everything you say makes sense but I just didn't expect to be feeling so low. I have been wanting to be on my own for years as I was so unhappy so I thought I would be happy.

Talking to my friend at work helps but I am so glad I have found this web site. I know I have made the right decision and I hope that I will feel happier really soon.

Thank you again for replying :yesyes:

Samantha xx

[Antonio2301]

You're welcome Samantha , I really do hope things pick up for you .I fully understand what you're saying about being a burden on your friend , I think we all think this way including myself. I`m sure if she`s a good friend she doesn't mind . Being on your own with anxiety/depression can become a very lonely place but you will meet others in similar situations as yourself on NMP and it time I`m sure you will start to feel better in yourself :hugs:

Antonio

[Marty_67]

Hi Samantha, might be worth talking to your GP for advice? You don't necessarily need to go down the meds route. Keep in touch, I have only been on a few weeks and already there are names I recognise and these people really do care.

Marty

[Samantha44]

Morning Marty,

I am going to make an appointment today with my doctor. I will keep in touch as it is nice to have somebody to talk to and who listen.

Thank you for your messages.

Samantha xx

[Marty_67]

How's your day been?

[Samantha44]

It's been ok thank you. Booked an appointment with my doctor for next week. Wish I could get if the sick feeling I constantly have in my tummy. Hope your day has been ok,

Samantha xx

[Marty_67]

Hi ya mate. Not been a great day, had a bit of an anxiety attack walking home but it passed. I did not sleep well and that seems to leave me wide open to my worries. Hoping for a better day tomorrow, had been doing ok. Need to sleep well tonight :)

Good luck for next week, my doctor is really good and it really was a weight mind of my mind talking to him when I saw him initially.

[kim22]

:welcome: :bighug1: xx

[Samantha44]

Morning Marty,

I'm sorry you didn't have a great day. I'm not doing too well today either. Been crying this morning for no reason. I get angry with myself as I don't know why I'm crying.

I hope you slept well last night and you have a good day today.

Samantha xx

---------- Post added at 08:43 ---------- Previous post was at 08:43 ----------

Hello Kim. Thank you :) xx

[Marty_67]

Hey Samantha, had a better night last night but wondering if I am entering a final side effect which is anxiety before things settle down. Reading some of the other comments on here, this side effect seems quite common...I was standing in the sandwich queue just now and felt anxious but honestly did not know why. I still feel tense and have just turned down a lunch invitation from a buddy because I want to calm myself down.

Sorry to hear about your morning. I always feel better after posting on here - a problem shared and all that. I think you have already taken some positive strides...talking about it is definitely a step in the right direction.

Marty

[Samantha44]

Hey Marty,

I hope you feel better now and that your day turned out to be a good one. It is my birthday tomorrow and I determined to enjoy it. Going out for dinner with my daughter and parents so hopefully should feel ok.

Hope you sleep well and have a good day tomorrow

Samantha xx

[Marty_67]

Happy birthday for tomorrow, mate!!!

Have a great day :)

[Samantha44]

Thank you Marty,

I hope you have a lovely, happy and calm day today.

Samantha xx :bighug1:

[Marty_67]

Many happies! How did your day go?

[Samantha44]

I had a lovely day thank you Marty :hugs:

[Marty_67]

I had a lovely day thank you Marty :hugs:

Great stuff, everybody has to be nice to you on your birthday...it's the law!

How's you been today?

I had a much better day, I sat down and thought thru my triggers and it really helped. Not so scary when you confront things. :)

Have a good weekend!

[Daisy-chains]

:welcome: to the forum x

[Marty_67]

How's your weekend been, mate?

[Samantha44]

My weekend wasn't too bad. Just stayed in all weekend.

Hope yours was ok.

Samantha xx

[SadKev]

Hi Samantha,

I`m new on here and I`ve just stumbled across your thread.

Firstly, I think you definitely did the right thing by ending a relationship that you weren`t happy in last year and long-term you will benefit from that.

I`m sorry that you are so unhappy and feeling down lately. Years ago, I was in a long-term relationship with someone who cheated on me and left me and it took me a long, long time to get over them. Even to this day I miss her at times.

Even if you don`t want to go down the anti-depressant route, I think you would benefit from at least speaking to someone and it may be an idea to ask your GP if they can refer you for some counselling. If it is on the NHS, you only get about 12 sessions but that may be all you need.

I think you are really brave for opening up and trying to reach out for support. If you want to talk at all, you are more than welcome to contact me either on here or by private message.

Take Care
Kevin x