Am so frightened of holiday

[barbie]

I am going to St Lucia in 2 weeks, with my partner and his business colleagues, who I have never met. I am now at breaking point and I feel like making some sort of excuse not to go as I dont think I will be able to cope away from home. I have a health prob that makes me anxious, but also being somewhere without a toilet makes me anxious, and being stuck on a plane for 8 hours. I feel this is the end of the road for me and my partner if I dont get myself sorted. I hate myself for being this way.

I'm not a nervous flyer, I have been flying since 6 months old, but now I am pretty worried I may have a panic attack on board and not be able to go anywhere! Can my doctor give me something? Like a sleeping tablet? Or Diazepam? I already take beta blockers.
On the way there my partner has paid for premium economy seats so I dont want to be asleep all the way as its not fair on him when he has paid so much money.
Things I am worried about:
1. Having a panic attack on the plane
2. Needing to wee on the long car journey to Gatwick
3. Getting stuck in traffic on the way to Gatwick (traffic jams make me freak at the mo, because they make me need to wee!)
3. Arriving at St Lucia, and having to go on a coach for 1 hour 15 mins with partners Buisness collagues and again, needing to wee!
4. Freaking out infront of strangers
5.Being so far away from home.
I have got 2 weeks to get myself sorted!
Any advice will be greatfully received! x

"Smile Like You Mean It"

[domino]

Hello carlabarbie, lorraine here i remember this post this was a freebi right? Please go i know it,s difficult and you want to make your excuses , but like i said before if you do,nt want to go you will make excuses, if you do you will. I would visit your g.p. and get some diazipam i find that they help,take some rescure remedy with you too. [MAY NEED TO CHECK WITH AIRLINE AS IT IS A FLUID]. although you can get tablets i think.Take a good book with you start reading something now ,something that will help take your mind off your anxiety. ANOTHER GOOD IDEA is listen to some of your favourite songs, everyone has an album that they just ca,nt get enough of. BUT please go you will only regret it after, and do,nt say that this is the end of the road for you and your boyfriend and do,nt hate yourself for feeling like this,you will be fine trust me on this one . you can do it and you will. keep us posted take care , lorrainexx

[yorkylover]

Hi there I cant really give you any advise because I would be exactly the same.I would try and stop worrying about letting your boyfriend down,have you explained to him how you feel.Lorraines advise sounds pretty good.
I hope it all goes ok for you,and that you have a fantastic time.

Ellen XX

[barbie]

Thanks ladies.
Yes Lorraine, its a freebie. We got the itinery thru today, nothing too scary or pressurising, it all sounds lovely.
I wrote down all my fears the other night, and, I dont know if this is related but I have had 2 full days with NO PANIC! So I am feeling positive at the mo. We shall see how the next week goes!

"Smile Like You Mean It"

[taffysteve]

Hey Carla,

I can definitely relate to this - as I'm sure a lot of us can.

The Doctor can provide you with a valium or two which gives me a 'whatever' attitude which works quite well.

The chances are that NONE of what you are frightened of will come to fruition, but the way forward is to accept that some of it might and it's ok if it does.

Most problems with anxiety relate to a fear of uncertainty. We want to know for sure that we won't panic, or won't need to pee, or won't cause a scene - but the fact of the matter is, we can't know for certain that these things won't happen, so we must try to accept that they could happen, but almost certainly won't. This removes the pressure we put on ourselves to have everything go smoothly.

Hope that makes sense?

Steve




***Fall down 7 times - stand up 8 times***

[barbie]

Thanks Steve, that makes a lot of sense and is very reassurring! I have to learn not to panic when I need to pee, I'm not incontinent so I dont really need to worry! Its because of a bad experience in Spain earlier this year...

Does anyone know if you can take Valium and Beta Blockers???

"Smile Like You Mean It"

[flatterycat]

Hi there

I know exactly how you are feeling. I get into a terrible state before I go on holiday. I have so many worries that I can never imagine how I will cope! For years I refused to travel too far from home and would never have entertained going abroad! Then one year I tried Majorca. The following year we went to the Dominican Republic, then Cuba and last year we went to Egypt and Greece. This year its Mexico!
I guarntee that about 2 weeks before we go my anxiety will go through the roof. I will start thinking I can't go, go off my food, feel sick, get strange symptoms and basically scare myself silly. The 'What ifs' are the worse - What if I get ill on holiday? What if I panic on the plane? What if I get ill on the plane? What if.......
I have even written letters to my husband telling how scared I am and that I don't think I can go!!!!!!!
Still - I do go and it's not easy, but I do it and after a while begin to enjoy myself! I would like to be less anxious when away - but it has to be said that I do it and it makes me feel stronger!
This weekend we are off to Amsterdam - me and my big mouth! When I told my husband I fancied it I was feeling really good, so he went and booked it as a surprise. Now I am becoming nervous - but, again I will go.

Accept that you are going to be anxious, don't fight it. Fill your bag with positive statements, rescue remedy and anything else which helps, but go - you'll love it. :D

[barbie]

Ahhh, thank you so so much.

I am allowing myself to get excited now, in fact I am MAKING myself be excited! And I am going to learn not to confuse excitement with panic, they can feel a little the same cant they!

Enjoy Amsterdam, I will send positive thoughts. Did you know there are more specific Bach Remedies for panic and fear other than Rescue Remedy? I posted in Alternative Treatments about it.:D

"Smile Like You Mean It"

[flatterycat]

Thanks Carla

I'll have al look at that post. The other thing I've started recently is running. I hate exercise, but have read so many good things about how it's great at eleviating anxiety. I've set up a running club at school (I'm a primary school teacher) on the pretext of getting the kids fit, but it's actually to motivate me and make me run. I wouldn't be able to let the kids down! Anyway, I'm currently coming off Citalopram so need to try other things.

Quite looking forward to Amsterdam now - honestly!!!!

Sarah

[jdoody]

Hi Carla
Please please dont let your panic stop you going on what could be a holiday of a lifetime. I went away this year and spent 3 months having the same fears as you, the doctor gave me some diazapan, I took one about an hour before I left and the whole thing from leaving home to arriving at the hotel in Cyprus was a breeze. It completely eased my anxious feelings and I enjoyed the whole journey im sure you will find that you dont worry about needing the toilet either. I didnt even have to take one on the journey home and I cant wait for my next holiday.
You have to face these things head on and say to your feelings 'come and get me panic,I can cope with anything you throw at me' and you are, we all are, despite feeling scared or low we have to remember that we are all coping and we will continue to.

Have a fab holiday

J.Doody

[PanickyPolly]

Geez your lucky...wish I had a husband to go to a beautiful tropical island with!!! Have fun and don't worry about it. I'm quite jealous actually lol. Panic attacks are always controlable. Nip them in the bud and BREEEATH. Also if you start to feel crap just think of me on me tod in the pouring rain and you'll soon feel better!

[izzab]

Hi,

I have been to St. Lucia before, and the bus journey is quite long - its partly on unmade roads and can be quite uncomfortable, just to warn you to sit near the front because it can be bumpy!

Izzab

[barbie]

Oh bloody hell. That is what I have been dreading. Over an hour on a bumpy bus. I will have to wear incontinence pants or something. I am breaking into a sweat just thinking about it...

"Smile Like You Mean It"