New Job

[TheManWithNoName]

Been pretty bad with anxiety in the past, I have just got myself into a comfortable state of mind, mostly down to exercise and filling my days the best I could. I went working in a voluntary position, I really got my head down and applied myself to make a good impression and they wanted me to apply for a job. In the work place is the lady who is the fiancé of a friend that really helped me when I wasn't feeling well, I am very thankful of the help that I received from him. I haven't been to their house much the past few months as I have been seeking full time employment and when I have been round I felt like I was intruding, as they have a new-born child and I felt she was annoyed of my being there just catching up with her fiancé.

I didn't plan to work In her department, it was just happen chance as I was asked to go by the job centre, to get some experience. She only works in the office 2 days a week currently. Yesterday I went round to my friends to catch up and to say I got a job at his fiancés office as I thought it was the right thing to do as when I went working voluntary I didn't know I was working where she did, so I didn't tell them. Today I get a text message from her, saying that she knows I am going to working fulltime in her department and that she will be civil with me, but that she doesn't want me near her family again. I would do anything for them, all it took was a phone call and I would rush round. I'm a quiet person, I don't like too much fuss and like to help people.

It's took me a few years to accept and control my worries and anxiety, I'm seriously considering not taking this job I put my whole heart into getting. It's seems like I can't have anything good in life, I have been over the moon this weekend that I can finally move on.

[Oosh]

Confused. Why has she sent you a text saying she doesn't want you near her family and that she will only be civil with you ?

[TheManWithNoName]

I don't no quite frankly, if I go round to their house, have a chat with my friend, on more than one occasion I would get a text from them where they would over analyse a conversation we had and take it as an attack on themselves, even though they were fine at the time and friendly.
I know this sounds confusing, but I have the same feeling as I don't understand why they feel this way. I'm not one to just be unkind or hateful to someone.

I'm so nervous now about this job, I've had insomnia ridden months that I've pulled through to get my life to some normality again, for something like this to happen now is killing me.

[Oosh]

Then, regardless of what she's said I'd call your "friend" and ask him what the snotty text is about. You've got to get things out in the open. No point leaving so much unsaid.
Tell him just to tell you straight what the problem is because it affects your friendship and this job you've been offered.

Because I'd need to know that to make my decision on accepting this job or not.

It's hard enough starting a new job without that kind of baggage involved.

Then whatever the response is you need to decide if you can work with this person.

Go voluntary somewhere else, put same effort in and get offered a job there.

Without knowing what their problem is its hard to comment.

Hope you get it sorted out.