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Hubby has told me he wants a divorce from me cause I am too anxious to go his sisters birthday meal :weep:I texted him to ask if I could have a drink because when I am anxious I can't eat he said grow up get help for anxiety and don't bother coming tonight I don't want you there me and you r finished. Now if I get a divorce who gets Brodie my daughter I won't cause of my medical background so I will be without a home husband and child what do I do Please please help me I am so depressed right now :weep::weep: thanks for reading
You're getting ahead of yourself. Wait till he calms down and talk about it.
Spondoolicks
12-02-14, 20:00
Hi Spuder, I'm sure this will blow over as it is only a meal with family. If you are anxious you really shouldn't drink anyway as it will in the long run make things worse. Try to talk to your husband when he returns and explain the reasons why you couldn't make the meal. I know what it's like to not want to do things because of anxiety. Family things are sometimes difficult if you don't get on with your in laws or maybe you are just anxious about them not liking you when they really do. Social anxiety can be so traumatic if you let it. I think you should try and make peace with your husband and then maybe suggest dinner at your house and invite the family around another time to make amends.
Thanks for the replies but he don't live with me he lives in Shrewsbury I tried texting him but he won't reply back. I was going to have an j2o not alcohol
Are you getting help from anyone for your anxiety?
Hi yes I am on the waiting list for cbt but it will take along time been told 30 to 59 weeks or maybe next year I want it to hurry up
That's a ridiculously long time to have to wait. Can you go back to the doctor and say you need some kind of help now?
I could but I dunno what the doctor will say. I told hubby today do u think I wanna be like this I don't. He just replied with well try hard to make it to the meal. He don't understand what it's like to be depressed and anxiety and emetophobic too
I know it's hard. Go to the doctor and tell him how you're feeling, tell him it's affecting your marriage. Also hubby will see that you're trying hard to help yourself.
Thanks I will go my doctor
Perhaps print your symptoms off from a web site and ask him to read them or leave the page for him to find. Perhaps if he realise it's not just you he may be more supportive and understanding.
Good luck!
There's a free CBT course here. Why not download it and give it a look. Many have found it quite good.
http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=131665
Positive thoughts
Update hubby has not calmed down he has txted me sum horrible stuff about me always being ill and I do it for attention I don't know what to do the house we live in is sold the buyer moves in in July I will be homeless if I don't move in with hubby but I don't want to move in cause he is being so nasty towards me
The worst you can do is to let yourself be stressed over it, this will only make matters worse and increase your anxiety levels, you're the most important person right now, I'm sure he'll calm down and things will be sorted, I don't think it's right what he said, he should be though to support you.
Thanks Gregg's he has never supported me he says he can't carry on with me being like this
You said it was so long until the CBT course started. Your husband is upset that you're not getting help nor helping yourself. Download the free course and start doing it if you can. Show him you're making an effort to get better.
My kids Mom suffered from severe depression disorder that manifested into hoarding. I understand what it's like to be a spouse of someone suffering. I stayed and supported the family for years while she suffered and would not seek help. I finally had to leave for my own mental health as she went to two therapy sessions and quit saying there was nothing wrong with her. I gave up at that point. If she had shown some effort in trying to get better, I would have been right there for her.
All your husband wants is for you to make the effort and show him you want to get better.
I know I don't speak for him but I've been in his shoes.
Good luck and positive thoughts
Thanks Gregg's he has never supported me he says he can't carry on with me being like this
Whatever happens...stay strong and be positive :)
Another update for u all hubby rang my dad today slagging me off but my dad started on him he was being very nasty and now says if I don't change my ways he will divorce me. I don't know what route to take do I live with him or try and get a place on my own but he has told my dad our daughter goes Shrewsbury with him and not with me I am an unfit mother I've had a very bad day I hate this life and I don't know what to do for the best please can any 1 help me give me advice
I know where you are coming from, my husband left me on my B'day at start of December, I had stopped going out, social anxiety etc. I am now on anti depressants, therapy etc and as much as I've tried to explain he just doesnt understand it as he can't relate to the physical feelings . He has hooked up with an old flame and is now making a new life with her, after two months, he never said he was unhappy it was a bolt out of the blue. So I too don't know where I will be living as don't know if he will pay the mortgage, I would suggest you don't text him back, go see your doctor, talk to a friend . I never thought I could feel this awful and despite him saying he still loves me he will never come back. But if someone loves you enough they support you and if they don't you have to break it down into day by day or hour by hour to get through. x
Am sorry to hear that big hugs to u xxxxx thanks for the advice
Hi yes I am on the waiting list for cbt but it will take along time been told 30 to 59 weeks or maybe next year I want it to hurry up
Wow...that's way too long :/
Thanks to u all for replying to my thread just a quick update me and hubby have had a very long talk about my problems and I am moving in with him and my daughter to Shrewsbury in July we have seen a house now and hubby will move in and me and daughter will stay weekends and school hols. I have been so silly I realise that now and regret not going to the birthday meal I am going to try harder next time a birthday comes up in his family. Thank you again u have really helped me xxxxxxxxx
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