Do you look how you feel???

[**whenwillthisend**]

Hi just looking at myself today(not vain or anything-quite the opposite) , but i was wondering at my age 26, why i look such a wreck........okay most days i feel like a wreck but why do i feel so washed out and look exactley how i feel...when i take my little boy to nursery there are a lot more older mums who look so much better than me-i feel so crap with this anxiety that i now have started to look crap!.......i always make myself presentable-wash my hair everyday wear decent clothes- BUT i look so worn out and tired (the little ones dont help) i know........i just want to look well!!!!!
does anyone share my feelings?

[belle]

100%!

All the mothers at my sons school look better than me. I generally cover up as much as possible so people can't see my face and i use a hat for that. Winter is great cause you can wear big coats that do up right under your chin...!
My skin looks grey and sallow, i have dark rings under my eyes and the grey hair is coming on nicely. Its no wonder i walk with my head down.
Sarah

[barbie]

Ladies, this may seem very shallow but I assure you its not...

When I lost my twin babies, and I was consumed with grief and fear of going out but really trying to get my life back on track, I was as white as a sheet, with black circles under my eyes. I looked like I had died too.

After about 5 weeks, my Mum made me go and have a fake tan done! It was bizarre, I was so sad, and felt so low I didnt give a **** about how I looked, but after I had the tan, a little tiny part of the old me came back. I felt a little better about facing the world...

I know it probably sounds mad and vain but it did help, and now when I am low and looking rough, I slap some tan on, and it gives me outer confidence.

You probably do think I'm shallow but I'm not. Just thought it might help.

"Smile Like You Mean It"

[mooks]

hey we've all been there...ive spent the last 2 months wearing no make up (unheard of) and its a struggle to even wash my hair...trouble is when your suffering nothing can make you look in the mirror and feel good..
Ive even started looking into Botox...anyone can tell me hey you look good...but because Mr Negative is with me at the mo I just cant feel good
Im hoping that this will just go...as my image is one of my worst traits of my GAD..so you are not alone xx

[HazyMind]

I also know just how you feel, and its annoying as sometimes when I feel and look so ill people will tell me how well i look and it works the other way around too, if I have a good day and feel well and positive about my appearance I'm then told how run down and drained I look[Sigh...] oh I just cant win.

I used to wonder how the perfectly pruned mothers doing the school run can look so great at 8 in the morning as they get their 3 or 4 children out of their people carriers but they dont have anxiety to live with and anxiety is exhausting, i often feel like i have run a marathon when i first wake up and just dont have the courage to look in the mirror to face my washed out looking self.

Try and treat yourself whenever you can, have a nice relaxing bath and indulge in some lovely bubble bath that might help pick you up and try and eat well, diet is important too for energy levels.

Hope you feel better soon x

[Phill2]

I look perfectly normal and that's the problem.
When you look OK no-one takes you seriously when you say you feel otherwise.
Phill

Don't believe everything you think.

[looking4answers]

We are all our own worst critics..I think that i feel the way I look..and then i ask my wife and she says I look fine..I get up and we have a skylight in the bathroom and I look at myself and it looks like im 102 not 52..You got to remember there are many 52 year olds that are playing in rock bands or exercising doing health equipment exercise commercials and etc..i look at myself and think ugh.. I look like death warmed over..and feel bad about myself although i too try to get showered and clean clothes and such..everyday .. and nobody seems to think bad or stare at me like im death.. and maybe thats the issue..i feel invisible.. like i just blend..Maybe that is what the problem is for you .its not that you look bad or think that you do ...maybe you just feel invisible..Im sure you look fine and you are just your own worst critic..

[candie]

Hiya everyone,

I dont know why but in all my years of suffering anxiety,depression and P A's ive always maintained my appearance.No matter how bad i feel,ive always had my nails and hair done(hair extensions,the lot) and still visit my local sunbed salon twice a week.

I'm a very insecure person so that may be the reason why.Its like i lead a double life,on the outside i'm confident but on the inside...well you know the rest.

Take care,Candie xxx:D

[Chopper]

Good topic!

It's interesting to see that this facet of our condition affects both sexes.

I'm struggling a bit at the moment and haven't shaved my face or head for about 3 weeks (I use an old fashioned open, cut-throat, razor and have been too shaky to risk shaving![Oops!]) and the grey hairs are now more prevalent than I remembered them being when I last had some hair.

During a 'turn' last year I went unshaven from August to May and looked like I'd just come out of a cave![V]

I'm on 40mg of Citalopram a day and another unfortunate side effect is my skin not only looks bad but is really spotty and I'm forever picking at imagined blemishes.

I shower daily, work in an office, wear smart suits, double-cuffed monogrammed shirts, silk ties, nice cufflinks, silk hankie in the top pocket, expensive shoes ........ and a visage like a subway beggar!:(

I look like I feel!

Happiness and light to all,
'Chopper'

I saw her once, one little while, and then no more:
’Twas Eden’s light on Earth a while, and then no more.
Amid the throng she passed along the meadow-floor:
Spring seemed to smile on Earth awhile, and then no more;
But whence she came, which way she went, what garb she wore
I noted not; I gazed a while, and then no more!

James Clarence Mangan 1803 - 1849

[strawberrie]

hi when, i dont know what school your son goes to, but most of the mums at my kids' school look as washed out and tired as I do! The'glamorous mums' with full make up and not a hair out of place are definitely in the minority. Cut yourself some slack, its hard work being a mum at the best of times, without having anxiety to deal with too :D.

mag

[sophieunderscore]

Have you thought about getting a mini manicure or something? When my anxiety was at its worse I used to go and have a manicure and felt great afterwards - the therapists used to help me more than my counseller at the time and it helped me relax and feel more positive :)

[Lindalou64]

GOD I HOPE NOT I WOULD BE DEAD...NO SOME DAYS I FEEL THAT WAY ....I THINK EVERYONE FEELS THAT WAY IF YA HAVING A BAD DAY OR SICK WITH THE FLU YA SAY I FEEL AND LOOK LIKE S...T WHEN YA FEEL GOOD AND ALL IS GOOD YOU LOOK GOOD.......YA THINK? THATS HOW I LOOK AT IT ANYWAYS.....................LINDA[8D]

[**whenwillthisend**]

well thanks to all your replies.......i think the worry takes it outta me and leaves me so tired, i know im not the only mum who looks as worn out as me but i wish i could have one day when i feel and look ok!
sophie-yeah i have started going to get my nails done and it does help to make you feel that bit better, so im going to keep up with the little beauty treats i think...........also the winter isnt a great time, with the bugs making us feel and look ill-so the fake tan idea is a good one too!
take care allx