Leukemia fear

[mgw]

Really struggling with this right now!

I think I have nearly all the symptoms.

I have easy bruising, very easy bruising! Always finding bruises especially on my legs like little circles. Iv had this for a good few years now.

I had a rash that kept appearing in different places that was like tiny red pin pricks that kept appearing on different areas of my body an disappearing after like a day, it wouldn't fade when touched.

An now my white blood cell count is high. It's meant to be no higher than 11,000, before Christmas it was 12,200 and now is 16,800. I haven't felt any infection etc.

Doctor sending me to hospital for a scan on liver then I have to do another blood test and if it's still high go to a blood clinic.

I can't find any other explanation for this an I did something stupid an googled an this seems like the only answer.

Really freaking out

[Spacedextra]

Hi there,

I'm not here to tell you I've had the same symptoms or that I know what your symptoms are like. What I can say is that through Googling my symptoms, I've self diagnosed myself with some truly awful things. I've put myself (and currently still am putting myself) through hell with looking things up.

I would say, that you are better off not being alone with your thoughts, you are better off not constantly looking things up every chance you get (guilty of this myself on a daily basis) and that over anything else, you try to understand that the human body is a complex, tricky and strange beast. One list of symptoms does not just mean one thing. Yes, you may read that your symptoms can be one thing, but don't think that's all it can be.

Our bodies are too diverse for it to only apply to one thing. Remember that above all else.

Seek help, absolutely, but don't let this consume your thoughts. It truly can ruin your life. I say that because I'm letting my thoughts do just that and can't bear the thought of anyone else doing the same.

Stay well, stay positive and do your best to do something that focuses your energy elsewhere.

X

[klg1975]

That's a great way to put it Spacedextra, "our bodies are too diverse for it to only apply to one thing". Absolutely spot on.

[Spacedextra]

THanks klg1975 - If only I could take my own bloody advice!!

[mgw]

Thanks for your reply, I definitely agree with you about google. It's just so hard, I have so much free time an my mind wonders always back to health issues so always do it. But Iv never been so certain about illnesses like I have with this :(

[Jonesle]

Do not google. Just do not bloody google. I hate google. The world would be a better place if Google wouldn't let you look up symptoms. I wish it would have warning messages "are you sure you want to look this up" "are you sure you want to spiral into despair because I'm going to tell you you COULD have x, y and z"
I'm guilty too, we need to trust our doctors. They get more things right than wrong. If you constantly worry and check yourself you'll find worrying things. I keep finding new moles on my skin. Guess what? So do thousands of other people every day. Thousands of people have high white blood cell counts, I find it extremely unlikely that they all have leukemia. Chin up, the docs will figure it out, and stop googling.
L xxx

[Spacedextra]

Google can eff off! It really can.

I've NEVER been diagnosed with Health Anxiety, but I'm almost positive I have it. It's that obsession, that constant thirst to find someone who has exactly the same symptoms as you - almost a macabre desire to find out your symptoms do match, so that you can prove you're not going through HA.

But as I said, I was sure, in the past, that I had testicular cancer, heart attacks, brain cancer. And it's always the worst possible thing that your mind jumps to! Have you noticed that! I never get these symptoms and think, "It's probably nothing serious". I always think, "I've got cancer".

What a lot of bother it really all is.

Free time and access to the internet are the devil. They end up going only one way for HA sufferers. We look stuff up. And we keep looking, and we post in forums, and when we get positive affirmation and advice, we hold it close for 5 minutes, and then keep on looking again.

In a way, we are more troubled than we realise. And it's almost always in our heads, not in our bodies.

That being said, getting yourself checked out is the best thing. You, and I, will never get the affirmation we require from these boards. We'll get temporary reassurance and comfort. But that's it. The real affirmations are positive thinking, rational thoughts (where possible!) and getting to see your GP so that they can tell you what they think.

If these forums and going to the doctor is the cure to our ailment, consider Google as an exacerbation to it's causes.

[mgw]

Thanks for your reply, it really is appreciated.

I'm going crazy with worry about this, my anxiety is through the roof. I feel terrible really terrible.

I'm gonna be waiting months to find out the answer to this..
Any suggestions on what I can do to calm down from it? Or anything? So so scared

[Frankie11]

Sorry but if youve had bloodwork done then those would be the 1st indicator of leukaemia, they would then do within days a bone marrow aspiration to confirm diagnosis, lymphoblasts or myleoid cells would be seen under a microscope. Did you get your neutraphil count?

My son was diagnosed with leukaemia is may 2013 so ive become an expert on blood work and the disease

[mgw]

So sorry to hear about your son Frankie11, I really do wish you and your family well. An I feel bad for posting these fears if it is simply my health anxiety going into over drive.

I got my neautaphil count, was raised (can't remember the exact figure), alongside eosinophils (showing the highest raise) and monocytes.

[Frankie11]

Well try and relax my son have neutrapenia at diagnosis which means little or no neutraphils, a raised neutraphil count plus white cell count means your body is doing its job and fighting something like a common cold.

Our son was anaemic at diagnosis normal range is 10-14 his was 5.6, had the petchai rash plus bruises, his spleen and liver enlarged both picked up through a simple blood count plus checking his tummy. We were diagnosed 2 days later and treatment started that day. All very quick so please keep thinking positive x

[mgw]

Thanks so much for taking the time to reply to me about this. I have been reffered for a scan for liver and spleen so hopefully this won't be too too far away and can calm my thoughts from then on.

Again, I really do wish you and your family all the best, and stay positive x

[Frankie11]

If it puts your mind at ease go for the scan.

Were doing good 9 months into a 4 yr treatment plan keep us posted x

[anthrokid]

I have the exact same symptoms at the moment, and have had for quite some time - very easily bruised, pinprick 'rash' that comes and goes, fatigue. My doctor has tested for everything and found absolutely to explain my symptoms so far. Interesting to hear that there are a couple of people with the same symptoms. I hope your tests come back well and you just have strange blood like myself. Keep us updated!

[mgw]

Thanks for your reply anthrokid- makes me feel a lot better! What levels were your wbc at?

Had the liver scan- sorted it in my hometown so got seen quicker and results came back fine!

Now I feel so horribley ill wondering if it is something else causing this!

[anthrokid]

Honestly I cannot even remember what my WBC were. I don't suffer from HA anymore, so as quickly as I learn about a problem with my body I forget it, haha. I also had liver scans, and I remember there was one evelation in something, but again, they couldn't find anything to cause it. if your liver scan has come back clear that's generally a good sign :)

I know it's hard not to worry when you don't have a solid answer, but try to trust in your doctor. They have the best knowledge about your problem and will do everything to figure out what's going on.

[mgw]

Just thought id post an update-

My white blood cell count is finally normal again! Have to do recheck tests in 4 months but I am so much calmer!

Thanks for all your support an hope your all well. Sorry for writing such a over dramatic post!

[anthrokid]

So fantastic to hear :) Congratulations!

[Round in circles]

Good to hear that you've gotten good news :)

[LE]

Fantastic to hear!x

[mummyanxious]

Good to hear x