Anxiety/Panic attack AFTER eating...

[Wintear]

So, I managed to tough it out and muscle down some chicken strips and mash potatoes for dinner about a half hour ago. (I'm struggling to eat solid foods due to an Anxiety-induced fear of choking as well as some pretty severely swollen glands in my throat..)

Okay - good for me. I got through it. I ate something. It took everything I had, but I somehow managed by some miracle. Thing is, after eating it, I went to brush my teeth and while I was doing so, my mouth and throat got extremely dry and for some reason, my throat felt tighter and more "full." It was like there was a massive weight pulling downwards inside of my throat. I tried desperately to ignore the feelings and finish up in the bathroom. Again, I managed. Just barely, I'd say. Immediately after, my glands were more swollen than they were before I ate. My mouth and throat were still dry so I don't know if that added to the feeling or not. There's more pressure where my glands are now. I panicked and started to continuously feel my throat with my fingers. I kept swallowing and "coughing" too. I don't even know why...I guess it was in an attempt to relieve the anxiousness and pressure somehow.

Anyway, now I'm concerned that I've further damaged my throat. I keep telling myself that it's life-threatening and I'm going to suffocate to death or something later on or any moment now. I don't know what to do or think...it feels like I'm being strangled and pulled down by an invisible force. Also, I'm starting to become weak and fatigued again. I just ate a half hour or 45 minutes ago (tops) so that doesn't make much sense to me. :/

For every one step forward, I take ten steps back it seems like. This is why I've been avoiding solid foods. I knew something like this would occur and leave me worse off than I initially was. It's hopeless....and so am I. :/

Should I call it quits...? It's been almost three months now and I can't personally take note of any signs of improvement.......

[Althea]

I don't know what you mean by "call it quits," but if that's a suicidal thought, please immediately phone the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at 1-800-273-8255.

If you've mentioned in your posts, I'm missing it--what treatment are you undergoing for your anxiety, Wintear? I'm afraid you're not getting any, and that's what you really need. None of what you describe is physically dangerous--swallowing isn't anywhere near your glands, so it can't hurt them, and it sounds like their swelling might be more your perception than actuality anyway.

Please find somebody trained to help you with this if you haven't already. You deserve to feel better, and you deserve to be helped to feel better.

[TooMuchToLiveFor]

Sure hope this will help-- taken from "Symptoms" at top left of page:


Throat tightening/Choking/Swallowing problems

What you feel:

Often one of the first symptoms of anxiety. People complain of feeling as though they will choke or being strangled. In reality its not nearly so dramatic - the muscles in the throat contract and salivary glands produce thick mucus leading to a feeling of restriction around the throat, it can produce a feeling that you are having difficulty swallowing or breathing. In fact you are not having difficulty, it just feels as though you are. You also get a dry mouth and it can feel like you cannot drink but you can.
You feel as though there is something stuck in your throat or sometimes feel there is a lump in your throat. Other times you may feel that you can barely swallow or that there is a tightness in the throat, or that you have to really force yourself to swallow. Sometimes this feeling can lead you to think that you may suffocate or get something stuck in your throat.
What causes this:

When in danger, stress biology produces a tightening in the throat muscles which produces the choking or 'something stuck in the throat' feeling. When in a nervous or stressful situation, many people will experience this feeling. It is often referred to as 'a lump on your throat'.
There is minimal danger of choking or suffocating under normal conditions, however, some people are very sensitive to things in their throat and therefore caution should always be observed when eating. Chewing food thoroughly andslowly will prevent inadvertently swallowing something that may provoke someone to gag. This symptom can come and go, and may seem to intensify if one becomes focused on it

[Wintear]

Thank you for the replies. This is terrible. I'm barely eating as it is. I just don't know how much more of this my body and mind can take.

No, I am not suicidal. I'm just severely depressed and concerned that I won't be able to pull through this time around. I woke up a half hour ago and already I'm being overwhelmed by this choking sensation. (Note that my glands are actually swollen as this was confirmed by both ER doctors and my dentist..)

[Rennie1989]

Anxieties in general are horrible but for this to actually affect your eating to this degree sounds awful. Are you seeing a doctor for this?

[Althea]

But swollen glands aren't dangerous and won't be harmed by swallowing. So I'll echo Rennie--are you seeing a doctor for your eating anxiety?

[greggs92]

glad to hear your not sucidal, that's the last thing you want to do

[Wintear]

Thanks. I think my appetite is diminishing slowly. That's not good. My diet is also going downhill. I'm not seeing a doctor or therapist. I don't see what a doctor could do. A therapist is just somebody to talk/vent to. The last two I sought help from while in High School did me no good whatsoever. I don't know. I feel I'm at a complete and total loss...

I've been through bouts like this before in the Past. Twice before, more specifically. The whole fear of choking thing, I mean. It took a long while to overcome the fear each time, however. It's not like I just snapped myself out of it or anything effortless like that. It can range from a few weeks to 5-6 months at most. I feel like this time is the most severe it's ever been. That's what's worrying me the most.....

[Althea]

Wintear, there are lots of different kinds of therapy. I really think you need help that you're not getting for this, and I think a doctor will know much better than you do about what help can be given.

What's to lose? Please call somebody.

[Wintear]

Like who, though? The way I see it is that it's all psychological. No kind of physical approach can cure it. I only wish it were that easy.. :/

[Althea]

If you have a doctor, start with him or her. "My anxiety is making it difficult for me to eat, and I want help with that." Doctors don't just sew you up, after all; they can work with stuff that goes on inside your head as well as outside of it. And you make it sound like "psychological" means "beyond anybody's help," and what it really means is you have to see a different kind of expert, that's all. If you don't have a doctor, I'd point you to two resources. First, the NAMI helpline at (800) 950-6264, which you call and say exactly the same thing to; second, if money is an issue, here's a guide to finding low-cost counseling: http://captainawkward.com/2011/09/22/how-to-locate-low-cost-mental-health-care-in-the-us-and-canada-guest-post/

I can assure you I'm not saying that it's easy, and you do have to be willing to do the work, whether it be complying with a regimen or being honest and vulnerable with a therapist; I can understand it feels harder than staying where you are. What it is, though, is more effective than succumbing to anger attacks and eating anxiety and hoping they will go away on its own. Isn't having a better life than that worth giving something a try, even if it's not easy?