View Full Version : Feel like I'm making progress then boom
So this last week especially, I have felt like I'm coming out of the worst. Then today I woke up and it was like my brain was telling me that I need to worry, I should be worrying, it's like a niggling voice in my head telling me I'm kidding myself for thinking I'm able to recover
All morning I've been telling myself to rise above it but it's like banging my head against a brick wall. One blessing is that I'm nowhere near where I was a few weeks ago. That was a dark place indeed, I'm so terrified of feeling like that again
Can anyone relate or tell me this is normal? I've tried distraction, I've tried acceptance. It's almost like I've been pre programmed to be set at high anxiety and to expect anything else is just wishful thinking.
I have recovered from anxiety before and it reared it's head again a few months ago. I'm scared I'll never be 'normal'
ankietyjoe
04-03-14, 09:35
I think it's a common phenomenon for most people that suffer with anxiety. All you can do is keep telling yourself that it passed before and it'll pass again, because it will.
I would highly recommend mindfulness and vipassana meditation for dealing with this as it teaches you not to react to the negative thoughts. They simply pass through your mind like all the other mind clutter you experience during the day. It's hard and requires practice, but it does work.
Thankyou joe I'll look at that certainly.
It helped reading that. It's 'negative thoughts'
It's almost like I need reminding that this is typical anxiety and not reality. Well that's what I'm hoping x
ankietyjoe
04-03-14, 09:54
One thing that helped me was the understanding that the fight or flight response comes from your subconscious mind, and that part of your mind is VERY quick to react and very, very powerful. It's fed from your conscious mind though, what you think, what you see, what you say to it.
It's like training a Rottweiler :)
I have this problem. Even when I am calm, my mind seems to need a problem to work on. I find myself feeling as if I am neglecting my anxiety. And if there isn't a problem I create one. I am convinced now that retirement and lack of distractions is a major problem for me.... But it is just an over active imagination. A mind trying to find reasons and answers.
I think the best thing to remember is that anxiety is a response to perceived danger. It is a very primitive part of the brain which does nothing other than invoke the flight or fight response. It is very fast and it is designed to make you feel an urge to act.
The response also hijacks your mind which backs up the physical feelings with a sense of dread and foreboding. It's a great system that makes you want to run or do something. There is no real danger, so it's inappropriate, but it works the same if the danger is real or imagined. The trick is to try and do the opposite of what feels right. It goes against the natural feeling but it's the only way to convince the brain that there is no real danger. It's really difficult (I know this, as I struggle to do it) but you have to stay calm, observe the thoughts but realise they are just thoughts and do what you would do if you were not thinking or feeling this way.
It take a LOT of practice.
Phil
I have this problem. Even when I am calm, my mind seems to need a problem to work on. I find myself feeling as if I am neglecting my anxiety. And if there isn't a problem I create one. I am convinced now that retirement and lack of distractions is a major problem for me.... But it is just an over active imagination. A mind trying to find reasons and answers.
Phil
This is me! It's like I can't neglect it through fear that it'll come back full force and I won't be prepared like last time when it knocked me off my feet. I always need something to think about... If it's calm I start to worry it's the 'calm before the storm' I'm so sick of this.
I have a very very creative mind. I have a huge imagination had I don't think that helps.
Massive thanks for the replies. Kinda hoping it's just a blip in the road to recovery and not a full on lapse xx
This catches me out everytime but it will pass it always does.
I just think it's very cruel when it happens just when you think things are getting better then BAM it comes back,mainly for me in the mornings.
See it as part of recovery & just let it run its course trying to remember the good feelings you have when you feel better.
If you are like me your mind demands that it has a plan. So I am prepared.
My therapist suggested that my plan should be that I have no plan!
Everything about anxiety is a paradox.
We want reassurance but the constant search for reassurance and certainty feeds the anxiety. We want the feeling to go away but fighting it or pushing it away feeds it.
We want answers, but searching and working it out also feeds it.
And when did any of us come up with any answers... It's a problem, yes, but one which does not require a solution.
Wish I could follow my own advice!!
Phil
On my road to recovery and it wasn't an easy one, i found alot of the time we spend waiting.
When our days are going good we wait for anxiety to come and ruin it.
When our days are going bad we wait for anxiety to come and add to it.
We might aswell move anxiety in, welcome it with open arms and make a bed for it because we spend so much time waiting for it to come.
In my own experience i had anxiety issues over a number of things and as the years grew by, my anxieties grew too, anxious over more and more things.
Logically, anxieties are not going to disappear overnight, they can take weeks months and years to grow, it kind of becomes who we are, so to combat it is going to equally take as long as they did to grow.
Don't ever feel that you can't get rid of them fears because you can as i have done, the key is not to fear them feelings and for me, this was the turning point, this was the beginning of my freedom from anx.
Each and every one of my anxieties that grew over 24 years, i tackle each one and take it on, its a bit like giving up smoking, you'll have so many attempts and one day you will be in that right frame of mind to take on that fight and win.
Don't ever give up and feel you can never have your old life back.........because you can.
Di x
Hi, yep I can relate :) I suffer from GAD. I have days where I feel where Im going backwards with my anxiety often :weep: I thinks its very normal and common for people with anxiety problems. I would suggest being referred by a GP to a therapist unless you've tried that. Maybe try taking medication from your doctor. You can find a lot if ways to lower anxiety online such as deep breathing, doing a hobby or activity. Sorry if Ive not been much help :wacko:
If you are like me your mind demands that it has a plan. So I am prepared.
My therapist suggested that my plan should be that I have no plan!
Everything about anxiety is a paradox.
We want reassurance but the constant search for reassurance and certainty feeds the anxiety. We want the feeling to go away but fighting it or pushing it away feeds it.
We want answers, but searching and working it out also feeds it.
And when did any of us come up with any answers... It's a problem, yes, but one which does not require a solution.
Wish I could follow my own advice!!
Phil
YES! I always need a 'plan'
I feel like I'm constantly working things out in my head, I create what if scenarios all the time and find plans for them too. By having these plans in my head I sometimes feel snowed under, ABSOLUTELY NONE of this has ever helped me not even remotely. I wish I could follow your advice too. We will get there I'm sure, at least we know that this isn't 'normal'
Ok it's normal for anxiety sufferers but that's not the normal we want to be :shrug:
Thanks for your input xx
---------- Post added at 22:20 ---------- Previous post was at 22:18 ----------
This catches me out everytime but it will pass it always does.
I just think it's very cruel when it happens just when you think things are getting better then BAM it comes back,mainly for me in the mornings.
See it as part of recovery & just let it run its course trying to remember the good feelings you have when you feel better.
Thankyou :) I'm hoping this is a part of recovery. Hope you're doing ok too :) morning are always my worst time. I've found they are easier when I get up straight away and eat (thanks to the advice I got on here) shower and crack on straight away with my day. Xx
---------- Post added at 22:21 ---------- Previous post was at 22:20 ----------
Diane,
Thankyou for taking the time to write that post, honestly the kindness on here is touching.
What you say made a lot of sense thankyou xx
---------- Post added at 22:23 ---------- Previous post was at 22:21 ----------
Hi, yep I can relate :) I suffer from GAD. I have days where I feel where Im going backwards with my anxiety often :weep: I thinks its very normal and common for people with anxiety problems. I would suggest being referred by a GP to a therapist unless you've tried that. Maybe try taking medication from your doctor. You can find a lot if ways to lower anxiety online such as deep breathing, doing a hobby or activity. Sorry if Ive not been much help :wacko:
It's always a help when someone replies because they too can relate. It helps enormously. I do relaxin and I'm taking 5htp which I think are helping me in fact I'm convinced they are. Thanks xx
Charlotteee89
07-03-14, 18:00
I can suddenly go from feeling pretty calm to feeling really anxious seeming out of nowhere! But I've noticed that my anxiety gets worse when I'm not thinking about something so as soon as my mind is empty BOOM here come the anxious, irrational thoughts & worry.
It's almost like my mind is demanding something to concentrate on... I've also forgot what's 'normal' to have on your mind as I'm so used to having such anxious thoughts.
Also, when I am feeling calm thoughts like "Ooo I'm calm! Why aren't I feeling anxious?!" come into my head then BOOM anxiety appears again! It's a horrible cycle.
I feel like I'm losing myself sometimes... But it's just my anxiety. I just want to feel 'normal' again.
I used to associate my house as my 'safety net' but now it's the opposite.. Being stuck at home drives me crazy! I feel so trapped & isolated... Unreal almost. It's weird. I think it's cause I felt like that when I was having bad panic attacks at home (mainly at night) a few weeks again & unfortunately I now associate those feelings with being at home. :/
I do feel more 'sane' when I'm out or at work. Days off are a nightmare for me... Once I loved them! Just loved relaxing at home doing nothing... Now I don't as my anxiety gets 100x worse. I have such a good imagination & an analytical mind too, which doesn't help!
Ah and that's where I am at the moment. I worked for 43 years and retired 3 years ago.
No more stress... I can do what I like and enjoy my retirement. Loads of time to think and it's awful.
Now the problem is I have made retirement a problem and if it is, then I am doomed.
I think it's just my mind needing a problem to work on. If I got a job, that would be the problem.
I think I should just accept that anxiety just completely screws with our thoughts. It hooks you into negatives that are all just rubbish. Why do we take all this as if it is the truth.
It's no wonder we feel anxiety when we are playing all these stories to ourselves and even worse believing them.
I got up feeling anxious, went to the gym feeling anxious... Went out to lunch feeling anxious, spent the afternoon with family feeling anxious then eventually decided I am crap at acceptance and carrying on as normal, and got in a right state once I got back home. You just can't win... So why not accept defeat and give up the struggle and just allow it all. The killer thought was I can't cope with this.. And I believed it again!
Phil
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