Bowel Cancer - so afraid [Archive]

puzzledlass

06-03-14, 06:19

Heya,

I'm off and on on these forums, depending on what ailment I "have" at the time!

I've had HA about breast cancer, ovarian cancer, aids and hep b in the past. I've had scans and blood tests for the above and have been clear.

My latest fear is bowel cancer. I think it started when I saw something in the media about a young person dying from it and hello the seed was planted. I put it out of my mind until recently when I went toilet (didn't poop) and saw some brown on the toilet paper. It kinda looked like the brown blood you get at start/end of period (ladies, you know what I mean.) I haven't had this since.

I panicked, but was at work so had to act like all was OK. Of course I googled and well we all know how that pans out.

My stomach has always been troublesome, as long as I can remember it's been a combination of normal to loose stools. Also when anxious the need to go toilet can happen instantly!

I had blood tests earlier this year and they were all OK and doc wasn't worried, also had abdominal scan in August last year but pretty sure that didn't cover bowels.

Where I live seems to have a higher rate of bowel cancer which certainly doesn't help the fear. I'm 30 in April and so so afraid of this. I keep thinking that it's a certainty I will die shortly from this and I have trouble getting through every day.

Any advice or words of wisdom would be much appreciated. Thanks for listening.

---------- Post added at 19:19 ---------- Previous post was at 17:24 ----------

bump :(

Phuzella

06-03-14, 07:33

Anxiety plays havoc with bowels, especially the needing to go instantly. You've had tests which showed all was OK, but if you're worried go to see the doc to put your mind at rest. And stop looking at the media and Internet! :)

puzzledlass

06-03-14, 09:16

I am going to see doc next week. My mind is all horrible and I keep thinking about death, my family, my partner etc.

It's driving me crazy. I don't want to die. :(

hanshan

06-03-14, 09:41

We're all going to die. I turn 60 this year, and there is a very good chance that I will die several decades before you (I'm assuming you are not around my age), yet I'm fairly accepting of my lot.

Spend some time working with or talking to elderly people. It will help give you some perspective.

You know you have health anxiety. You need to acknowledge that it is an irrational fear of physical disease without basis, and focus on treating anxiety as your illness.

Button1

06-03-14, 09:45

puzzledlass, if you look at my most recent post or any of my posts really, you'll see that they are ALL bowel cancer related. This has dominated my life for over 2 years now and when I say dominated, I mean pretty much ruined.

It started when I had a very vague sensation under my left rib when out running one day and in my mind it never went away. I had an X Ray, ultrasound, multiple blood tests, a physcial examination...and yet have been on antidepressants and through several rounds of CBT because I just can't shake this. I do have IBS (apparently, I am not convinced really) and all the symptoms that go with that.

I have a lovely life- a beautiful little boy, a lovely house, a supportive husband and a good job. Am I happy? No. I haven't been for years. If I can do anything with my HA, it's to stop anyone else getting like me.

It is very common to have a bit of liquid stool leakage with IBS which given that you saw brown liquid when straining is most likely what happened to you. Do go to the doctors for reassurance but please try to accept that you are fine (I know this is hypocritical of me but still...!)

x

puzzledlass

06-03-14, 10:08

Thank you so much for your replies, it's so good having people who understand to talk with!

I've struggled with OCD my whole life, also I'm Aspergers which probably intensifies the obsessions. It's only in the last few years that HA has taken over and I think this is because finally my life is how I want it! I have a job (don't love it but who does), an amazing partner and a gorgeous daughter. I don't want to lose all of this, instead I torture myself and ruin what I have!

NZ has a high prevalence of bowel cancer, which certainly adds to the anxiety.

The part that scared me was that I hadn't gone #2s when I saw the brown stuff. I keep thinking back to when that happened and thinking was that what I saw? It hasn't happened since but it doesn't need too, the fear has taken hold.

It's strange, I live in a country on a giant fault line, that has caused fatal earthquakes before. I accept earthquakes as a possibility, because hey what can I do about that? I can't change if and when one happens.

When it comes to my health, because I DO have some control over it I panic. What if I had this for years and didn't get it checked and now it's the end?

Button1, it's not hypocritical. We seem to be far more logical when it's someone else's HA!

Button1

06-03-14, 10:23

It's only in the last few years that HA has taken over and I think this is because finally my life is how I want it! I have a job (don't love it but who does), an amazing partner and a gorgeous daughter. I don't want to lose all of this, instead I torture myself and ruin what I have!

When it comes to my health, because I DO have some control over it I panic. What if I had this for years and didn't get it checked and now it's the end?

puzzledlass, you're exactly like me! My HA started with a vengance when I got married and I thought I had everything I wanted...and then I started to wonder "What if everything goes wrong?"

The funny (well not funny but ironic) thing is that I deal with real trauma pretty well- I recently had to terminate a pregnancy because the baby was severely ill and disabled but I have taken that, as much as is possible, in my stride. I'm not falling apart. But there are days when my HA makes me feel like I can't get out of bed and face the day. I truly hate that about myself and all I want to do is make the most of what I have and get on with my life, but I can't...

Sorry, I don't meant to hijack your thread but I hoped it might help to have some sort of mirror on your own anxiety and at least to see that you aren't alone in the way that you think and feel...x

puzzledlass

06-03-14, 10:40

You aren't hijacking, it's much appreciated and knowing someone else thinks and feels like me!

I get the trauma thing too! I have not had an experience like yours with the pregnancy but was sexually assaulted a few years ago and dealt with that far better than I deal with my HA everyday.

I also get mad at myself for not being able to just live and enjoy what I have. It's like I feel I don't deserve this amazing life i have...

Button1

06-03-14, 10:51

I'm sorry to hear about the assault. That must have been horrific but well done for coming through it.

We aren't bad people, we do deserve what we have we just have to make sure that we work hard to live our lives as fully as we can and do them justice. I think that's where I fall down personally. I'm so scared of losing my life and being separated from the love of my life, my son but I don't make the most of every second I have on this earth! It's crazy...

Fishmanpa

06-03-14, 12:44

PLass,

You've gotten some very good responses. You're not alone in your feelings and that's the benefit of the forum. While that's a comfort, it doesn't change the way you feel or the fear nor treat the problem. Your post is not unusual in that you've had several cancer fears and they all turned out unfounded. I believe this fear would be the case as well considering a news article and subsequent visit to Dr. Google sent you into this current spiral.

Many here have had success treating their anxiety with CBT, therapy, meds or a combination thereof. There is a free CBT course here on the site. Some have recently had some success with dietary changes. If you haven't already, it would be in your best interest to see a professional concerning your HA and get yourself a bag of tools and a sword to help you effectively battle the Dragon. Life is so precious. Don't allow him to take it away.

Positive thoughts

Althea

06-03-14, 15:09

Remember also that even with the higher NZ rate, the vast majority of Kiwis don't have bowel cancer--the number I'm seeing is .37% for women. So that's over 99% without it.

emlica

06-03-14, 15:13

It's interesting, actually. I've seen quite a lot of people say 'I don't know why I get so worried about my health, in the past I dealt with XYZ (traumatic situations of various sorts) just fine, so why can't I now?'. And I honestly think that the XYZ is actually the reason. You thought you were fine at the time, but it comes back to bite you later. Pretty sure that's been the case for me, at least. I had two years where all sorts of stressful things happened - multiple deaths in the family, moving house, changing job (twice), etc, and sailed through it with no symptoms of anxiety at all, thought I was bulletproof. And then all it took was one (admittedly very nasty) bout of gastroenteritis and I got into a spiral of anxiety about my health, and also got more anxious about other stuff in life as well.

Jonesle

06-03-14, 17:52

Hi there. are you sure it wasn't spotting from a period? Or are you always 100% regular? To the hour? I have the odd spot now nod again especially when I'm stressed, had a smear recently or maybe too hard sex?
Also emlica-glad you said that about how 'suddenly'we can't cope. I feel like I've gotten through a lot without even a glimmer of anxiety or depression. Suddenly after one single point I'm the most wound up, stressed out and sad individual, worry over anything and everything and sometimes for weeks on end about the same uncontrollable thing! X

puzzledlass

06-03-14, 20:40

Hey all,

It wasn't spotting from a period, I know when this happens also it wasn't coming from the right hole for that. :S I don't have sex that's super hard, and no smear recently. This is why I'm so afraid. :(

I honestly am at a loss, I don't know what to do. I don't want to leave my BF and daughter here without me.

Jonesle

06-03-14, 20:47

Lol the wrong hole! Just wondering because when I wipe (this is getting rather graphic) I wipe front to back in one clean sweep. So even if it's just a number twos I tend to number ones at the same time, do you not do that?
The only thing I can suggest is to definitely not google!!! If you listen to one thing I say make sure it's not my wiping habits but my advice to never google. Has it happened since? If not it wouldn't worry too much, if so then mention it to your gp but I'm sure there's a perfectly harmless explanation x

puzzledlass

06-03-14, 20:55

One of the reasons I like this place is that we can be graphic and no one is judging! We are all here because we suffer the same and know what it's like.

When I go, I wipe the back first and then the front - different bits of paper of course. It hasn't happened since, but I keep thinking back to that time you know? Sad that a toilet trip is taking up so much of my mind.

I'm now freaking out because there were black specks in my poo, panicking that they are bits of dried blood or something.

Sigh, I dunno. I will definitely go to the Doc and will also ask about resources I can use to help this HA. I cannot afford counselling or the like so will probably investigate the CBT programme that many NMP people use.

Fishmanpa

06-03-14, 21:06

I honestly am at a loss, I don't know what to do. I don't want to leave my BF and daughter here without me.

I wanted to copy something from your OP, highlight some things and show you how this is spiraling downwards in an attempt to maybe help you nip it in the bud. It's gone from something you pretty much dismissed to leaving your bf and daughter in a couple of days.

"My latest fear (meaning you've had others before and they were not what you thought) is bowel cancer. I think it started when I saw something in the media about a young person dying from it and hello the seed was planted. I put it out of my mind until recently when I went toilet (didn't poop) and saw some brown on the toilet paper. It kinda looked like the brown blood you get at start/end of period (ladies, you know what I mean.) I haven't had this since.

I panicked, but was at work so had to act like all was OK. Of course I googled and well we all know how that pans out."

No one here is a doctor so it's best you see one if it happens again. You haven't said there are any other symptoms, it hasn't happened since nor do you feel bad other than very anxious. Based on your OP, it would seem, it's just a weird thing and harmless... maybe it was something left over from an earlier visit to the bathroom?... that happens you know (I know...ewww... but it does).

I hope you feel better soon...

Positive thoughts

puzzledlass

07-03-14, 00:07

Fishmanpa

07-03-14, 00:33

You are so wise fishmanpa, I've seen you console so many on here in what must seem like a fruitless attempt.

I've always had a messed up bowel/stomach system. BF thinks I have IBS and he could be right. He's right also when he says I dance around the issue at the doctors. I guess I figure I've had this troublesome gut for the last 20+ years and i just live with it.

I made a suggestion in the tips section about keeping a food diary. And I mean really keep one...everything you put in your mouth and how much. Do it for at least a month and keep notes. You may find certain foods make you feel a certain way or cause you more issues than others.

I love certain foods but they sure don't love me! ~lol~ I know 100% of the time that when I eat pizza, I get indigestion and feel bloated. I still eat it but WAY less than I used to and make sure I take an acid reducer an hour beforehand ;) (I still pay for it but not as bad ~lol~)

If you've not done any counseling, it may be wise to consider doing so. Speaking with a professional about your thoughts and anxiety would be beneficial. There's also a really good CBT course that's free here. It's helped me with some depression issues and there are some tips and exercises in there that apply to every day life. It's worth a look see.

Definitely speak with your doctor about your stomach issues. It's seems that anxiety and stomach/bowel issues go hand in hand. Do a search and you'll find pages and pages dedicated to stomach problems.

Positive thoughts

puzzledlass

07-03-14, 10:33

Thank you all.

I am trying hard to not freak out and write myself off.... it's not easy and I am close to cracking point. I will start to feel OK and then... bam I remember the blood(?) thing and I'm lost again.

I see so many stories about young people suffering from bowel cancer... it's so hard to not pay attention to those you know?

---------- Post added at 23:33 ---------- Previous post was at 19:33 ----------

Still freaking out, oh my gosh this is insane.

cpe1978

07-03-14, 12:49

Let me throw something out there.......

You say 'You see so many stories of young people...........', couple of questions for you.

How do you see them? I certainly dont find myself stumbling across such things too often so can i suggest you might be hunting them out?

How many is so many? Let's take my age group 35-39. There are roughly 2million UK males of that age. So let's pretend that I manage to find 100 stories about cancer in my age group which seems like a lot to me, well even then it still a staggeringly low percentage and I bet when you say many you dont mean over 100.

HA is a battle of rationalisation and acceptance of uncertainty.

puzzledlass

09-03-14, 02:34

Thanks all.

I feel like yesterday I coped ok but today is not going well.

I am going to the doctors on tuesday to discuss my concerns and I am freaking out about it. Likelihood is they will ask me to do a FOBT (poop test) to see if there is blood in stools. I'm not so worried about the actual test but how long I am going to have to wait for a result.

In my head, if there IS blood in the poo I have bowel cancer. That's it, no other explanation at all. I then fear the following tests to determine why, once again more the wait for the tests as opposed to actual test. Oddly enough I'm not scared of them sticking a tube up my butt or whatever else. The wait though, that will kill me.

I have been doing my best to console myself and be rational, but as I mentioned earlier it just takes that one instance of seeing blood and I am verging on a panic attack. I try to remember to my last CBC which was a month or 2 ago to reassure myself, the doc said she wasn't concerned about my bloods. I just think "what if" I still have it though? I don't want to die!

I've used to be aneamic and have always had low iron, which is one of the symptoms of BC. Also, my tummy and stools are always verging on diarhhea and semi normal.

So so afraid and so much anxiety at the moment.

puzzledlass

09-03-14, 08:18

Agh I'm terrible.

I googled and saw that brown blood could be from further up intestine, so could be due to something really bad.

I had this only once and am trying to calm down but am not calm at all.

puzzledlass

09-03-14, 20:53

I seriously need help. This is eating me up.

I've convinced myself of the worst. That my years and years of tummy issues are actually cancer and now it's too late for them to help me.

I can't function.

Button1

09-03-14, 22:16

I'm really not feeling good this evening so I'm not sure if I can be of any help, but what I will say is that you cannot have had bowel cancer for years and the only sign now be a but of brown blood ( if that's even what it is). You would be incredibly ill or even dead by now. The blood tests you had recently would have absolutely shown something massively wrong...

I'm very panicky and teary tonight as I've had an upset stomach and bad trapped wind today which makes me think something is very wrong. : (

I just wanted to give you a little reassurance and remind you you're not alone xxx

puzzledlass

09-03-14, 23:38

Thank you buttons.

It's taken all of my willpower not to call in sick today. I work in customer service so don't want to burst into tears over the phone! My workmates don't know of my anxiety struggle so I need to keep it in check.

Did you ever have tests done for this buttons? If you did, what kind were they?

Button1

09-03-14, 23:46

I've had blood tests, an ultrasound, an x ray and more physical check ups than I can count (including a rectal exam!) all fine. In my mind they can't tell anything until I've had a colonoscopy which my docs won't let me have due to lack of justifiable symptoms and the stress it would cause me.

I'd encourage you to look back at all the bowel cancer related posts. None of these people has gone on to actually have it and many times their symptoms have been way more dramatic than yours (not to downplay your symptoms but just to make you realise that it can seem horrendous and turn out to be nothing at all...)

X

puzzledlass

10-03-14, 20:27

Ok so I have a doc appointment this morning. Am quite nervous, unsure what she will do or what tests I will need.

Freaking out

Button1

10-03-14, 21:17

Also be prepared for them to offer not very much. They are often reluctant to offer invasive tests unless there's a good case for them and you don't seem to have any other symptoms. Plus it only happened once...they might do a rectal exam perhaps, to check for fissures or the presence of blood. It sounds grim but it is honestly fine. I had one today and have had one previously. I think my doc almost expects it when I go in! Poor woman...I think you may find it even more beneficial to talk through everything you've been feeling and worried about and to get some help for your anxiety. It's easy to forget that it's the way we THINK about our symptoms rather than the symptoms themselves that's the biggest problem. I went today just to ask about the soft stools and the pains I'd felt and I felt 1000% better having talked it through. Haven't felt a single pain since...

Be brave and just spill everything to your doctor. Whatever happens, I promise you'll feel better for it x

puzzledlass

11-03-14, 02:27

Ok, so here's how it went.

Buttons, you were right they didn't offer much! I explained about the instance of pink/brownish blood and Doc then asked me if there was family history etc etc, to which I replied there wasn't.

I then had a rectal exam which well, as you can imagine wasn't my fave thing! She said it all looked fine.

She seems to think it's diet related, I don't know. I want to trust her, I'm not a doc after all.

Any thoughts?

Button1

11-03-14, 03:48

Well I'm in the same boat- i need to know for sure what's going on, my gp says she knows- that my BMs are being altered by ibs, stress and antibiotics and that eventually it will sort itself out. Eugh. That doesn't feel certain enough for me and yet what can I do? I guess if I demanded a colonoscopy she might eventually relent but do I really want to put myself through that? I feel like it would spell the end of my HA. My doc just thinks I'll move onto another cancer...

So how do you feel? Did you talk about your anxiety?

mbarger33

11-03-14, 05:56

Hello,

Currently I'm going through the samething..

I've had blood work. Fine.
I've had stool test for bad bacteria. Fine.
I've had an ultrasound of my abdomen. Fine.

I'm currently seeing a gastro specialist since my grandmother died from colon cancer. But he told me some statistics that suprised me, my mom and uncle had colonoscopy done after my grandmother died.. they both came back clear, no polups. So my doc told me this.

I have a 1 in 100,000 chance under the age of 50 to get colon cancer.
The fact that my mom and uncle were clear my chances are even less.
Plus the fact I'm 33 puts me even lower risk.

He pushed on my stomache didn't feel anything.

So he recomended we do a stool test for blood.. he said if those come back positive he's "going up there" with a scope because there's no reason there should be any blood in my stool at 33.

However he's convinced that its stress related, and says I'm at such a low risk the chances are slim even with family history because my mom and are clear of polups at 55 they may have passed the gene..

Its nice knowing the statistics. It makes feel better but I'm still worried why I'm getting theswe symptoms, as chrons is still a serious disease. I'm worried.

puzzledlass

11-03-14, 06:25

Thanks for your replies.

Buttons - I did have a chat about my anxiety, she knows me pretty well and knows I'm an anxious person. She said my story didn't sound convincing enough, which to some may seem rude but I prefer that she be straight up and just say what she thinks. SHe didn't do a stool test which seemed odd, but I guess she had her reasons. I am hoping so. She said to watch it and if it happens again to come back.

Mbarger33 - Thanks for responding. My bloods from December were fine and the ones before that were also. I had a pelvic US last year but don't think it covered bowels. I asked if my bloods would show anything seriously wrong and she said they would. I am trying really hard to trust her and what she says - after all she is a doctor and I'm not. SHe didn't seem worried... sigh I dunno.

Yes, the odds are slim although where i live has like the largest rate for bowel cancer in the world. We're not even a large country! I know it increases with age but I still see the horror stories and you know... mind goes wild.

Button1

11-03-14, 10:26

Did she recommend any course of action for your anxiety? Is CBT an option?

I haven't had a stool test either...in fact no one has ever suggested one! My trouble is that I'm wondering if my GP is so focused on my anxiety that she has completely overlooked the possibility that it could be something worse...although if I can't trust her, who can I trust? I'm also hoping to try for another baby soon so I can't go back on my anti-depressants. I'm a bit at the end of my rope to be honest and starting to wonder if I can really keep going like this :weep:I havent felt like that since I had my son but I don't feel like I'm much of a mummy like this anyway...

I'd push the GP to see if there's anything they can do to help with your anxiety, you don't want to keep feeling like this and there are so many options x

puzzledlass

11-03-14, 21:26

I wonder the same about my GP buttons, it's very obvious I'm an anxious person and suffer from HA... I've wondered if they assume it's all in our heads, however in saying that they do have very important responsibilities as a doctor and surely cannot just dismiss a concern due to mental state.

I'm now anxious as a couple of days ago I had a yellow colour BM and it also had a dark part in it. It didn't look black when i looked in bowl. I had a bit on paper (sorry TMI but I figure you all won't mind!) that had a reddy/brown colour on it. I smushed it with the paper and it was a red/brown colour. I am now freaking out it was red - blood.

I know what you mean buttons about feeling like one cannot go on like this... I made a promise to myself and others that I would never do that to them so it's simply not an option for me. Life can be hard, but I refuse to believe it will always be hard.

Button1

11-03-14, 22:19

No, I'd never harm myself. My son means the world to me, if I did something to myself that meant I wasn't here for him then he'd think that I didn't love him enough to be around for him. He's my whole world and the only thing I live for, I could never ever leave him in any doubt that that's the case, no matter how much it hurts to get through every day at the moment. There has to be a way for this to get better surely? As long as we believe that then we'll be fine.

I've had times when I've thought that I've seen red stool (black bits I don't tend to worry about, I always figure that's food? I've spent so long looking at my stool I feel like I can tell most things, gross I know...) the thing is that now I look at any stool and think its red- I've tested myself when I've gone into toilets that aren't quite clean (if you know what I mean??) and thought "if that was my stool I'd be worried..." surely not everyone who I've been in the same toilet as has bowel cancer?? So I just don't trust myself on that front. I'm willing to bet that the things you've seen are food...

Right- what the heck are we going to do?? X

LibrarianJ

11-03-14, 23:40

Hi there, my husband had bright red blood and lots. He was convinced he had cancer. Turns out it was all just a hemorrhoid! But anyone I have know who had bowel cancer had bright red blood even if just a little. I honestly think you're going to be fine as it doesn't sound like the cases I've heard of.

puzzledlass

12-03-14, 04:11

I'm so pleased to hear you wouldn't harm yourself Buttons, you seem like a very devoted mother.

Regarding the public toilet thing, I know what you mean! I don't trust myself entirely on what I see in the bowl either but argh, you know how it takes over our minds. Sometimes I have poo that's brown but does seem like a red brown you know? Kinda like a rusty poo... has anyone had that?

Hey Librarian, goodness your poor Hubby he must have been freaking out, you too as well! I'm pleased that it was a hemorrhoid and nothing else.

---------- Post added at 17:11 ---------- Previous post was at 15:49 ----------

Also is it normal to have a bM that is more than one colour?

Frankie123

12-03-14, 09:26

I went through many of the things you are going through. Blood in urine, one day diarrhea one day constipation. In the end to set my mind at rest the GP ordered what they call a virtual colonoscopy. They do not have to put a camera into you but it enables them to see if anything is wrong. If I were you I would ask my GP if I can have one of these. By the way my turned out to be diverticular disease

puzzledlass

12-03-14, 20:26

I would like to have one of these! Doctors seem reluctant to send me for any scans etc though. The scans I have had are when I've gone to after hours medical care and they have referred me.

I try to go to my own GP, however I do fear they see me as this great ball of anxiety (which I am) and don't even think I could have something worse. You know what I mean?

Button1

12-03-14, 21:27

Yes puzzledlass, I'm in the same boat entirely. They aren't wrong, I AM anxious! But it doesn't mean that there isn't anything else going on.

clover1201

12-03-14, 22:39

I thought I would write quickly. In Dec I had blood in my stool (clots mixed in with it) I had and still have a large mass in the right of my tummy, had lost 22lbs in weight and was exhausted everyday. I was utterly convinced I had cancer (feel free to check my posts) I was referred to gastro and consultant told me something interesting. He said that in his whole career he has only ever had around 10 of his patients under 40 diagnosed with bowel cancer. He said that he comes across BC every day, that its not a rare disease but at my age (32) I would be increasingly unlucky if it was. After all the history and all my symptoms he said he thought there was a chance there was crohns and ordered a ct and colonscopy. Guess what? No cancer but inflammation and ulcers. 17 biopsy and a ct later I'm still waiting for results (as they weren't back when they thought they were and consultant has been on holiday) but was told it was ileitis and am now looking at crohns and the lum,p in my side is my stiffened and inflamed bowel. My point being is that I had every symptom of cancer and it still wasn't cancer. With 1 occasion where you found a small amount of blood (and you don't even know for sure) I think the odds are very slim. You needs to forget it and move on, hard I know but essential to your quality of life.
Good luck and God bless.

puzzledlass

13-03-14, 02:03

Thank you for your replies. I am trying to let this go but it's so hard.

I've had these black flake/speck things in my poos recently (loose stools) and I'm terrified it's blood. Now my anxiety is fueling up again.

I didn't mention this to doc and now I'm so scared this could be the thing that makes her think that it's something serious!! Help please :(

mbarger33

13-03-14, 04:07

Is the doctor you are seeing a GP or a specialist?

puzzledlass

13-03-14, 04:16

mbarger33

13-03-14, 04:52

I wasn't getting anywhere with my gp. I just told her straight up that I wanted to talk to a specialist and that I would appreciate it if she referred me. She did. And after I met him and talked to him he was willing to give me any test I wanted. Naturally I asked which one he recommended first and that's when the blood occult test came up. So he sent me home with a kit and 2 brushes. And now I'm waiting on results.. I've had some questionable dark brown stools so we will see where it goes. Apparently this microscope test can't detect the smallest amount of blood.

Have you asked to see a specialist? If not I highly suggest it. And don't mention the anxiety thing. I didn't.

puzzledlass

13-03-14, 05:18

I may do. Problem is I can't afford to see a specialist.

I'm trying to trust my doctor but it's difficult.

What symptoms did you have mbarger?

mbarger33

13-03-14, 05:49

What symptoms did you have mbarger?

what haven't I had...

lower right abdominal pain above the hip, stool colors all shapes and sizes. Gray, yellow, orange, dark brown, brown, soft, pebble, wide and flat, ribbons. Faint pink on toilet paper, extreme itching, painful rash.

my first gp did blood work to check for anemia. Stool sample for bugs. Told me all was fine and to eat yogurt. I didn't like that so I switched doctors. First visit she ordered a ultrasound to check for liver pancreas kidneys appendix and gallbladder.

that test came back normal so I asked to see a specialist.. Surely the pain and discomfort is coming from somewhere so after asking twice she referred me.

When I went to him he said I can sell you 3 options. Stool blood test. CT scan with injection or invasive camera up the butt.. :blush:

I told him to do what he thought necessary, he said blood stool test first as someone in their 30's shouldn't be bleeding if the test came back positive he said I'm going up there.

so that's where I'm at now. Turned the sample in yesterday morning waiting for results still.

kirstynic

13-03-14, 06:51

It sounds like you have a good doctor mbarger, it's good they are with you on this and want to find the cause through whatever tests needed

How do you get a doctor to refer you for an ultrasound?

I am back to my doctors today have to see a locum. I was there in November for similar and after many uti tests that were positive in the surgery but come back negative from the lab I was told to only come back if I got worse, lost weight or appetite. Well 4 months on and I have a constant dull ache in my left rib area I have no appetite and am really worried. Convinced it could be pancreas cancer.

I don't want to go today and be sent away with pills I want answers. This is getting me down now and really worried but at 28 how do I make the doctor take me seriously and send me for tests and can a locum do that???

puzzledlass

13-03-14, 07:30

I had an abdo ultrasound and a pelvic US back in August. They were all fine. They wouldn't show anything with the bowels though right?

Button1

13-03-14, 09:32

ultrasounds aren't particularly reliable for bowels apparently although they would show if anything major was occuring, only a colonoscopy will show what is happening in your intenstines.

Kirstynic, I didn't have to try very hard to get my ultrasound in 2011, I saw a random GP at my surgery, had a breakdown and he just wrote me a referral. I think he wanted me out of his office!

Good luck at the docs x

kirstynic

13-03-14, 09:48

Thank you I am waiting now so will let you know.

It's weird because i am ok when I wake up in the morning then it starts

mbarger33

13-03-14, 12:27

According to my gastrointestinal specialist ultrasound isn't good for colon. Matter of fact he told me the camera has a weakness as only showing what's inside and said the best 100% way to see everything is a combo of CT scan with dye for outside the colon wall and camera to check inside.

My mom always tells me to be my own advocate. So just tell your doctor in a nice way that you really think something isn't right. And then polite tell them that it's their responsibility to refer you to someone that is specialized in intestinal matters. It doesn't cost them anything to write you a referral and if they don't, change gp this is what I had to do to get any tests done because the doctor I had before just didn't want to help me.

kirstynic

13-03-14, 12:44

I did exactly that and tho doctor thinks a ultrasound may be needed she wants to wait for blood results to see if it points to anything and give a better idea of what needs scanning

mbarger33

13-03-14, 15:10

Blood tests are a good starting point.

puzzledlass

13-03-14, 19:14

I will see how I get on with my GP. I'm torn between my HA and trusting the doc.

Trying to reassure myself, ie last 2 blood tests I had done were fine (latest being Dec), rectal exam was fine, Doc didn't seem too worried etc.

Trying to focus on those things, but then I start to worry again. Like, what if the black specks I saw were blood etc etc. Sigh.

Fishmanpa

13-03-14, 19:33

I'm torn between my HA and trusting the doc.

Ok PLass... read that one back to yourself a few times. You're torn between a medical professional that spent 8+ years in school and who knows how many years in practice, medical tests etc. and something you know to cause you doubt and worry.

If your life depended on it (and in many ways it does), where would you put your trust?

Positive thoughts

puzzledlass

15-03-14, 08:24

You're right Fishmanpa.

I think my issue comes from misdiagnosis. That the Doc will miss something and ... well yeah you know the rest.

puzzledlass

16-03-14, 00:46

Today has been a struggle. Today I am convincing myself of the worst. I really don't know what to do. It's taking all my power to not break down in tears.

Round in circles

16-03-14, 02:13

puzzledlass, I mean this in the nicest way possible I really do as I see how scared and worried this is making you, but I think in all likelihood that your problem isn't misdiagnosis but rather your health anxiety. Sometimes we need to just let go. Instead of desperately trying to prove that we were right all along, there comes a time when it's best just to stop for the sake of our sanity. If all the relevant tests have been done with no worrying results then use that as a means for reassurance rather than the jumping off point for the next test.

My stomach is pretty messed up. I have IBS and am getting tested for crohn's disease after several near fainting spells. I'm waiting on results and it's a worry for sure, but what will be will be. I can't do anything until the test comes back and making myself sick with worry won't help.

puzzledlass

16-03-14, 04:31

Hi Round in circles, I certainly know where you are coming from as I'm very aware of my HA.

I often have times when I use these things for reassurance, but then that doesn't last long as I think about the relevant tests that I HAVEN'T had.... what if they missed something etc.

puzzledlass

16-03-14, 23:38

Another tough day. Thinking I have to go back to doctors, get a stool test done. At least this way I will know for sure if there is blood or not. I actually think that if I get the test done and it comes back negative - my mind will relax.

If it's positive... well I guess it would be further tests. I don't want to think about that though.

Can anyone please tell me how they do a stool test? Process, timeframes, etc?

Fishmanpa

17-03-14, 00:22

Can anyone please tell me how they do a stool test?

Ummm....here's a cup...

I'm sure all will be fine. I've not seen someone's worst fear come true yet on this forum.

Positive thoughts

Sallyg

17-03-14, 00:54

Hello Puzzledlass
I have anxiety which very easily tips into Health Anxiety and as one poster above mentioned, I do believe this is all about traumatic things that DID actually happen in the past that I coped with just 'fine' at the time. For me it is a control thing, I find it very very hard to be in the unknown space when I have decided there is a 'threat'.

It's perfectly natural to respond to symptoms and get them checked out and then comes the tricky bit, where you seem to be at. Accepting that there is no threat to your health or from the Dr's who might, just might get it wrong. I have been here and out again a few times.

The thing is, Dr's do get it wrong, they are human, but, this isn't likely in your situation, I say this because I am very very sure you would have more symptoms and other risk factors to suggest Bowel Cancer. This is the factual, statistical side. My partner is currently going through tests to rule out Bowel Cancer, only because his father suffered from it and he has unexplained symptoms that do not really indicate cancer, but they are being cautious. I hope this aspect reassures you as well, they would not mess about with this if they thought you were at risk in any way.

Throughout my partners recent investigations I have had a chance to challenge this sitting in the unknown all over again and it was hard. But, it was possible. Possible to let the anxiety rise, clock it, check if it's rational or over reacting etc and balance it out to have some peace of mind.

I hope another perspective helps in some way. The place where you are at seems to be in the area of trying to protect yourself at the same time as recognising that reassurance is somehow only going to work for a short time. How about the idea you are not seriously ill and until something changes, that is more alarming etc you will try and live your life thinking you are well? Changing the belief that you 'must' be ill.

I know it's hard, I really do. Take care.

Round in circles

17-03-14, 01:34

Ummm....here's a cup...

I'm sure all will be fine. I've not seen someone's worst fear come true yet on this forum.

Positive thoughts

There's also a spoon. A tiny, tiny spoon. I kid you not.

Fishmanpa

17-03-14, 02:25

There's also a spoon. A tiny, tiny spoon. I kid you not.

OMG! ~lol~ imagining what would fit in that tiny spoon!....

Positive thoughts

mbarger33

18-03-14, 06:10

I just had a Stool test for blood done.

its a kit called FIT they send you home with that comes with 2 brushes and hard cardboard card with 2 areas that you brush your stool on, it should be done twice and each time a different day.

there are others things you have to watch out for, if you have hemorrhoids, on menstrual cycle or have blood in the urine you can test positive. My doctor suggested i use a plastic cup to catch, then brush that instead of letting it go into the toilet.

here in the states this is used anyway.

http://www.insuretest.com/medical/performance.php

don't order strips online because ive been told and have read that certain foods can cause positive results. like eating red meat carrots etc, this naturally can cause someone with HA to dive off the deep end. its best to have the test given to you by a medical professional to take home and do.

If they are testing for food poisoning or bad stomach bugs then yes, you get two tubes, 1 with a special preservative in it and one with out. both have little shovels under the caps that you use to scoop the poop and fill to a certain line.

Both test are done at home, and both tests take about 3-4 days for results.

puzzledlass

19-03-14, 05:55

I wonder why the Doc didn't ask me to do a stool test?

Sallyg, your advice is appreciated and makes a lot of sense. The trouble is believing that I'm ok with the symptoms I've had and the Doc's opinion on it. I guess I think if she didn't do a stool test etc, how could she be sure?

Button1

19-03-14, 10:45

puzzledlass, I've never been asked to do one either (though based on the instructions above, I'm pretty glad as I'm sure I'd get it wrong!!) even though I really only ever visit my gp for anxiety/ bowel reasons and as it's not invasive, I always wondered why she didn't get me to do it. I suppose she's actually being a very good GP as I don't think I've got symptoms that warrant it really (you can tell I'm having a good day!) I have had one episode of rectal bleeding but they put that down to a fissure and in all fairness it hasn't happened again so the chances are that they are right. She probably doesn't want to use resources that she can't justify and doesn't want to put me through the wait for results and she has always cautioned against using tests as reassurance as she fears that it won't stop at one test- if one is clear I may well ask for another so I can be 'certain' (the holy grail!) She has asked me to trust her that if SHE thinks a test is necessary, SHE will make the call.

If I continue to have bowel concerns (like the ones I've had with my soft stools) I will ask for one as the first step however.

Learning to trust your doctor is a big issue in health anxiety but it's an important thing to put right I think. If you are really worried, ask your gp what they think about a stool test maybe...but bear in mind that even bowel cancer websites refer to multiple episodes of bleeding as a potential concern, not a singular episode and if you look at threads on here you'll see that loads of us have had rectal bleeding with no sinister causes. Plus you don't even know at this point that that is what you had...

xxx

Sallyg

20-03-14, 01:08

puzzledlass

I completely understand your thinking. Some suggestions on how to problem solve and reduce the worry. You could either

1) Choose to ask for a stool test. Would this investigation be enough for you to feel reassured?
2) Choose to wait and see what happens with your symptoms, perhaps a 2 week period. Then decide whether to follow up with the GP

I can reassure you that blood tests often show cancer markers for bowel cancer and also bowel cancer is often slow to develop, therefore if you had blood tests earlier this year (depending on what for) they would perhaps indicate if something were a miss. Also you can afford to watch and wait with the symptoms.

It is so hard to balance the health anxiety with the symptom investigation etc, you are the only one that can decide where you 'let go' and trust or where you need to ask for more investigation.

Wishing you well

puzzledlass

20-03-14, 02:32

Thank you all.

I had a CBC along with other tests, thyroid, liver, kidney stuff done back in December. They were all OK. Would those tests show anything?

I think that if I did have a stool test I would have reassurance. That way I would KNOW for sure if there was blood, not examine my poop and think "is it or isn't it?".

Yes, trusting the doc is so hard! I know she's trained and knows a heck load more than I ever could... but tis a burden that comes with HA.