Overthinking - What a nightmare that is!

[Charlotteee89]

I've been suffering from extreme Anxiety for about 3-4 weeks now after initially recovering from my 10 year + plus Society Anxiety problem (well almost recovering from it).

I've been doing a lot better this week but I still can't stop the irrational thoughts that plague through my mind at random intervals.

I think what isn't helping is that I'm getting pretty sick of my job - well very bored of it. I'm kinda panicking about the future, wondering where on earth I'm going with my life or where I want it to go. I feel like I'm wasting my life.. I just feel a bit lost - or maybe it's my anxiety making me feel like I am when actually, I'm not. It's so confusing! :wacko:

I'm also having bouts of derealization & depersonalization which aren't helping & are making me feel even more anxious.

I basically just need to calm down... But I naturally have an analytical mind & I can't help but overthink/over-analyze everything. I obsess over random things & It's almost like when I'm not thinking about something specific then I feel lost... It almost feels like I have no idea what I'm meant to think about or what 'normal' people think about...

I'm just overthinking & I need to stop! :doh: My mind is racing at 100mph.


Anxiety eh! :lac:

[caroline-j]

Hi Charlotteee89 you sound just like myself. Do you ever get any physical symptoms through obsessing over your thoughts? x

[Charlotteee89]

Oh yes! As soon as my anxiety kicks in I start to feel nauseous & lightheaded.

I also feel really edgy & distracted... Almost separate from myself & other people, disconnected.

Like tonight for example, I've been out with family & family friends for a meal & was an anxious mess throughout most of it. I just couldn't concentrate & felt really disconnected & weird. But I did have times where I didn't feel anxious but as soon as I realised I'm not anxious BOOM here comes the anxiety again. I have a habit of analyzing everyone around me asking myself questions about them like "Do they ever feel like this?" "Are they feeling isolated deep down?" Then I get annoyed with myself that I can't stop all these thoughts & feel normal.

=/

[Tanner40]

Hi Charlotte. Welcome to NMP. Have you ever tried CBT? I have a tendency to over think things as well, and I have found it to be great for turning my irrational thoughts into rational ones.

[Charlotteee89]

Hi Charlotte. Welcome to NMP. Have you ever tried CBT? I have a tendency to over think things as well, and I have found it to be great for turning my irrational thoughts into rational ones.

I've actually just this past Tuesday had my consultation appointment with a Therapist for CBT. :) I'll be seeing her again next week. She's going to do CBT & Mindfullness with me.

[Abi-Skinner]

Hey,

I'm currently going through the exact same thing, job included.

I really hate depersonalisation and the racing mind, I too am constantly analyzing and thinking about how I'm feeling, as well as looking at other people who look "normal" and thinking what it would be like to be "normal".

On a lighter note, this will be my 3rd bout of really bad anxiety over the last 8yrs, the other two times were just as awful, but they passed and during that time I have been able to live pretty much anxiety free, I managed to go to college to get a HND, then on to Uni to get my degree, as well as meet my husband, buy a house and get married.

There is hope, we can and will get better, it just takes time and perseverance :)

[caroline-j]

Hi Charlotteee89, thanks 4 taking the time to get back to me. I think that the physical symptoms of anxiety sucks. I hope you find CBT and Mindfullness works 4 u. All the best in your recovery. x

[Charlotteee89]

Hey,

I'm currently going through the exact same thing, job included.

I really hate depersonalisation and the racing mind, I too am constantly analyzing and thinking about how I'm feeling, as well as looking at other people who look "normal" and thinking what it would be like to be "normal".

On a lighter note, this will be my 3rd bout of really bad anxiety over the last 8yrs, the other two times were just as awful, but they passed and during that time I have been able to live pretty much anxiety free, I managed to go to college to get a HND, then on to Uni to get my degree, as well as meet my husband, buy a house and get married.

There is hope, we can and will get better, it just takes time and perseverance :)

I really frustrate myself with how I can't stop over thinking & over analyzing! I had a busy day yesterday, went shopping with a friend from work & felt okay. Then we went out up town last night with a childhood friend of mine but I couldn't just simply enjoy myself... I was over thinking & analyzing myself & everyone around me. Then when I finally did start enjoying myself & living in the moment I started to feel really nauseous & lightheaded (due to haven't not ate for 5 hours) which made the anxiety come right back. Ugh!

I do know why I do the over thinking/over analyzing thing though... I seem to be obsessing over the fact I haven't got many friends, something I never really thought about before - I was just so happy last year with finally getting a job & finally meeting some friends at work! But when I had a bad panic attack 4 weeks at night all sorts of thoughts raced through my mind including one's of loneliness (even though I wouldn't actually class myself as lonely at all) & now I can't seem to shift those thoughts! I was out last night looking around at all the people who were out (it was so busy last night!) & thinking how much I wanted a big group of friends or at least more than just a couple of friends who I don't see that much & how much I wanted a 'best friend' or that kinda closesness with someone I kept observing everywhere.

I just want to enjoy myself & stop obsessing over things & just 'live in the moment' for heavens sake. :wacko:


Hi Charlotteee89, thanks 4 taking the time to get back to me. I think that the physical symptoms of anxiety sucks. I hope you find CBT and Mindfullness works 4 u. All the best in your recovery. x

I know, it's a horrible cycle! You start thinking things so the physical symptoms come, then because you start feeling not right it causes the anxiety to get worse. UGH.

& Thanks so much. :)

[Abi-Skinner]

I can relate to that, I moved to where I live now in my early twenties and haven't made any really close friends since, lots of acquaintances, but no "best" friends as such. It can be really tough.

You're defiantly doing the right thing tho, going out with friends and family, just now your only having brief breaks from anxiety, but the more you keep at it, the longer and more frequent the breaks will become and hopefully one day you won't have to deal with the anxiety at all.

[Charlotteee89]

Awww, that must be tough!

I don't know what happened to me 4 weeks ago but what I do know is that I don't want to feel like this anymore. It's like a can of worms has been opened in my head & I just can't put the worms back in & shut it. I thought my anxiety was caused by gluten so I went on a gluten free diet & I did feel better but I've been eating food with gluten in this past week & I feel awful again. Not sure if it is actually the gluten or whether it's just me. :shrug:

Going out definitely does help to a certain degree... But I do get overwhelmed & angry by my thoughts when I'm out.. Like last night.

I go from one obsession to the next & it's all very mentally draining to be honest. My mind is all over the place. I suffered from SAD for absolute years until last year when I finally got myself a job & started driving lessons. But it's almost like now I'm exposed to social situations & feel fine in them other thoughts have suddenly appeared like "Oh I don't have many friends..." "Oh I wish I had a better social life..." "Oh look at those people over there, I wish I had that kinda friendship with people..." Etc etc. Having friends before was such a scary prospect but now it's like I'm craving friendship 'cause I'm so much more confident.... Or maybe it's my anxiety over-analyzing, convincing me of these thoughts. I didn't really have those thoughts before 4 weeks ago.

Sorry to waffle on. :blush:

[Abi-Skinner]

I think I may have SAD too, in fact, I'm pretty sure it has a lot to do with my current bout of anxiety.

I'm pretty confident when I say it's anxiety that is causing your current thought patterns, I've had them with every bout of anxiety and when the anxiety goes, so do the negative thought patterns. In fact, believe it or not, when I'm anxiety free it's impossible for me to even remember what my negative thoughts were.
I think you'll find CBT very beneficial, it encourages you to challenge what your thinking and to come up with more positive responses.

I'm sure I saw a thread on here a few days ago by a gent who swore gluten had a lot to do with anxiety in so many cases.

My main comfort in times like this is, although it's crappy right now, it will get better :)

[Charlotteee89]

According to my Therapist she thinks I have a mixture of a few different Anxiety Disorders, which is actually pretty common.

When I last saw her I was having different intrusive thoughts but since then I've had others (the loneliness, friends ones) which are debilitating me on & off. Like I said before, my anxiety seems to make me go from one obsessive thought to the next every week or so. :wacko: & Then when I'm feeling okay, certain things like reading something or watching something will trigger the thoughts again.

I definitely experienced that for 2 days earlier this week! I was really happy & chilled & couldn't quite understand all my previous anxiety thoughts. But then BAM they appeared again on Thursday when I was home alone, bored, on my day off. (My anxiety gets worse when I'm at home, especially at night.)

I can have moments where I feel positive but then I'm thinking to myself "Oooo my anxiety has gone.." So of course it re-appears. :doh:

I just need to not allow myself to get overwhelmed with my negative thoughts & just be positive & not analyze everything! Pretty hard though.

[Abi-Skinner]

Very hard, but with practice and patience, it can be done :)

[Charlotteee89]

At the moment I'm reading 'Obsessional Thoughts' on CT Online & oh my gosh it exactly describes what I'm going through with my thoughts!

I have several different 'types' of obsessional thoughts bashing through my mind but they all link in some way. At the moment I'm obsessing over feeling lonely & not having many friends (basically what I was talking about in my earlier posts on this thread).

I can't even watch t.v to distract myself because there's reminders all over it! As soon as something friendship wise appears BAM my thoughts race through my mind. At the same time I have a fear of the fear... I'm so scared to have these thoughts that it's causing me anxiety anyway. I just want them gone, I think they appeared in the first place because I'm just a bit fed up with my job & not doing much.. I want to live my life & when I had that panic attack 4 weeks out of the blue all these negative/obsessional thoughts raced through my mind & put attention on fact I feel like that. Maybe my mind was looking for something to obsess over? Who knows. But I know from reading the worksheet that it's a waste of time trying to find a reason behind having the thoughts... I think that's just how your mind works.. You're constantly trying to solve a problem, especially when it's distressing. Also, it is almost like once I've overcome one intrusive/obsessional thought my mind brings in a new one...

[Ryan92]

Hi, I have anxiety problems too. My anxiety is not as bad as it used to be I still feel anxious about lots of things. If Im not worrying or panicking about something my mind feels like its forcing me to feel anxious or obsess about something :weep:. Maybe that just the way I am, Im not sure. I have OCD, GAD and social anxiety problems. Ive had CBT but Im waiting for future sessions or maybe different types of therapies from my therapist or consultant. Also if Im not worrying about something I worry of what people I know like my family think of me having these problems. Sometimes I think do they really understand or they don't understand at all but they are very supportive :). I too fear about my future, I think things like what if Im not able to cope, what if I never have a family of my own, what if I never make new friends, what if I'll never be in a relationship, what if I never learn to drive, what if I never get a job. Sorry to have go on a bit there :wacko:. Ive been unemployed for 3 years and when I did get a job late last year I wasn't able to cope with the huge change in my life. It was making me have panic attacks every day and the week before I started the job was the worst week of my life, it didn't help that I had to wait a week before I started and then my anxiety got even worse. I also had thoughts of suicide and was constantly crying. I don't have many friends, I keep in contact with 1 but he's working a lot so I don't see him as much as I used to :weep: so most of the time all I have is my family. CBT has really helped me but Ive noticed my anxiety has increased recently, probably because Im feeling down and not receiving no support because Ive got to wait until April and May for additional therapy sessions :wacko: I feel as if Im going backwards right now but I just need to be strong and use the CBT techniques Ive been taught.
I hope my struggles after CBT haven't worried you, I feel the only reason Im going backwards is that Im not currently attending any sessions and maybe I need some other type of therapy along with CBT. My last CBT session was in january. Some people would probably be able to cope better in this type of situation compared to me but Ive just got to accept it and keep positive. Well done on having a job and dealing with your anxiety at the same time. If you can handle a job with your anxiety, then you are fully capable of overcoming your anxiety :D Good luck with your CBT and mindfulness :)

[Charlotteee89]

Awww, sounds like you're going through a lot! Our minds can be so destructive at times. :hugs:

I was doing great when I got my job last year but of course still anxious in social situations but I did eventually overcome that (well not 100% I still get SAD in some social situations but that's due to my low self esteem) but I've been gradually declining for 4-5 months now which I think is due to being anemic without knowing so. I had so many viruses last Autumn which completely drained me, I also had a fainting spell at work which threw me off quite a bit. I think my anxiety has got worse since my iron levels have got low & unfortunately that brought a lot of extra physical symptoms which then contributed to the anxiety that's been building up till it came to a head 4 weeks ago completely out of the blue when I had a bad panic attack which threw me back into an anxious mess. :wacko: It was such a horrible experience & the thoughts/feelings I had during that panic attack have stayed & are causing me anxiety now. I can't seem to shift them!

My problem right now is obsessive/intrusive thoughts... I seem to go from one to another & I feel so drained. I can't seem to stop obsessing or over-analyzing!

I'm hoping CBT & Mindfullness will help me considerably... It feels like a wire in my brain has gone funny! It's such a weird, scary situation to be in. I've never had such severe anxiety, I feel so overwhelmed by it at times. :wacko: