Constantly bothered by anxiety! :/

[10kgirl]

Hi! I'm new to this thread and I just want to share my story. I experienced my first panic attack with palpitations around 4 months ago and because of that, I had to quit my job because it constantly bothered me while I was at work and dedicate my time to school instead.
I started googling all my symptoms because I always felt sick for some reason and spaced out. Sometimes, it would be worse for a few days then it lessens and it just goes like a train of circle.

There would be times when I felt like anxiety disables me from everything, I no longer feel happy or normal like before. I don't even know what I'm stressed about, my mind would just seem empty and blank sometimes. I had a variety of symptoms, sometimes I would have headaches or certain spots of my head would hurt and my whole head would feel sore and I would start freaking out and googling thinking I have a brain aneurysm or something bad and I would start worrying. I went to the doctors constantly the first two months when I started getting these but they ruled in my blood test and xray that everything is normal.

Other times, I would have chest pains and come and go during the day and I would start googling the symptoms.
Sometimes it would feel like I have muscle spasm and my muscles on my leg/arm or head would slightly jerk like once and I just started worrying that something might be wrong.

My vision has been really weird lately, like I would be doing something and the field of vision in front of me would suddenly alter its perception and the way of looking at things makes me super uncomfortable like everything doesnt seem real. I googled about it and it said derealization. This symptom just comes and goes.

I also started getting really anxious and nervous about things like when I talk to a friend or someone I would immediately have this derealization feeling. Sometimes, I would slur or stutter with some words I say which leads me to googling thinking I might have a seizure or stroke.

This is really affecting me because everyday I wake up, I know that I would have some sort of sympom that would lead me to thinking something is up with me. I constantly feel like I can't be alone at a place or go somewhere far by myself because something might happen to me(like I might faint and no one would be there to help me). I recently got my permit and I really want to start taking lessons to drive but I'm scared that with my spaced out feelings at times, I might not be able to concentrate on driving.

I'm 18 and I'm thin and slightly underweight(my parents are both really skinny). before, I had no history of being sick, etc.

I'm really don't want to take any meds because I believe that meds can't really solve the problem. I'm really new to this and I really want to find a way to cut down on this anxiety. Any advice please? :weep:

[MyNameIsTerry]

Hi,

It's probably a good idea to seek some help for this in the form of therapy such as CBT. A therapist can then talk you through how your emotions, thoughts & physical feelings interact with each other and try to find a strategy to get you better. It doesn't work for everyone and sometimes may take more than one go or you don't feel better at the time but start to change afterwards, but it's worth a go. It would be good to speak to your doctor about this and see if he/she can refer you.

You don't have to take medication if you don't want to but for many people it is useful because it will help to restore some balance to your life while you work on your issues. Modern antidepressants are not like years ago, they use non habit forming ones long term nowadays such as SSRI or SRNI's. They often use short term ones to provide relief but you don't normally continue with these as you get used to the SSRI/SRNI's.

Not being in the US, I can only speak for how GP's in the UK tend to work. They would normally refer you for help anyway because medication is not a fix, it's just a way to bring you back down a bit so you can work on your issues until you are ready to come off them.

There are side effects at first but not everyone has them and they can differ dependant on medication or person. They can increase anxiety at first for a couple of weeks and I won't lie, it is tough, but you get through it and it's easier after for many people. Some people also have to move between meds as they find they are better suited to certain types.

I just wanted to say that as people are often afraid of medication and don't know what to expect.

Back away from medication anyway, aside from CBT, you could try relaxation techniques such as progressive muscle relaxation or Mindfulness meditation.

PMR is just an exercise you follow for about 15mins and you should be able to Google it for guides, vids and probably downloads.

Mindfulness meditation is just relaxing your breathing, concentrating on a few possible breathing mechanisms (e.g. rising & falling of chest, imagine coloured air in and out of lungs or concentrating on muscles around the bribcage and how they move) to start and then it's just talking you through letting your mind wander and any thoughts that come into your head, dispell them and come back to the present, concentrate on breathing again, etc. It's easy to do but it doesn't come to you straight away but it does over time if you practice with it. It also branches off into quick meditations, walking ones, ones in public, etc so you can use it in daily life.

Perhaps try those to begin with. A CBT therpaist is likely to recommend them anyway, mine did.

Mindfullness has also been integrated with CBT now and it's a popular treatment endorsed by the NHS (National Health Service) overhere. With this it's usually an 8 week course where you do the CBT side (understanding thoughts, feelings, emotions, setting goals for yourself to get better and how, reviewing, etc) but each week has different meditations inline with the goals at that point. These courses can be done online, with therapists or you can just buy a book and do it on your own. Obviously, it's down to money from there but you can get a book cheap to start. If you want to do this, just look for Jon Kabat-Zinn, the founder, I think he's a US guy, but in the UK we have Mark Williams who tool it forward overhere. I have Mark's book and it's a lot like the CBT I did with the meditations but I'm only on week one at the moment.

Aside from that you could try more natural ways to keep calm e.g. chamomile tea, some herbal remedies, relaxation aids, etc. They may help but the above ones will probably give you more over time.

I don't have HA myself, I have (GAD, OCD & depression issues) so hopefully someone who understands more about how you feel will reply but the above work for anxiety & depression in general so hopefully they will help. A therpaist could then provide a more tailored approach.

You may find a local support group as well, like on here, where people understand how you feel, if not the individualities of your anxiety. A lot of the symptoms and negative thoughts plague us all so it can sometimes help to socialise with people who understand that you may be nervous about situations and it can help to help others in that circumstance.

All the best.


Terry

[HalfJack]

^^ What they said! 100% ^^

I am similar to you in a lot of ways.
I got my first long term job after going on medication when I was 19, after suffering a trauma, it took the edge off my anxiety which meant I could hold down a job whilst I got back on my feet and 8 months later I stopped taking it. I still had anxiety but I could cope without meds.
I'm not trying to get you to take meds, it might not be right for you, considering them a solution is not good, but they are, for many people part of the process.

I find it hard to relax, it can be difficult working out what relaxes you, I tried meditation and it didn't work for me at all, but don't doubt it, my friends swear by it!

Writing my anxieties down when I'm upset, then going back to it and writing down a solution when I have calmed down helped me a lot, the next time you panic you think of the solution to the problem too.

The best advice I ever got = If you have a panic attack try focusing on something, ANYTHING you can see and describe it in ridiculous detail, this engages (another part of your brain and pretty much forces you to calm down). It works pretty quickly but takes some getting used to to get it right.
E.G:
Curtains, old looking, closed, thin material, floral, 5 different flowers, 3 different leaves, connected by vines, one has pink petals green middle, they are in a repetitive pattern, cream background etc