A bit of everything, panic, palpitations and no support

[cloudbusting]

Hi all

Well, it's just as the title says really. I just need a bit ofa sound off and a bit of advice or your own stories to put me at ease!

Had been doing really really well for a couple of weeks but then this week have suddenly started getting quite alarming palpitations. So bad the other evening that I caved in and called a paramedic :blush:

Of course, all tests were fine and no palps when he was there (typical). We chatted for a bit and he recommended that I get my thyroid checked. I duly went to my GP the next day and, bless her, got the test done there and then. If it comes back ok then she said she would refer me to the cardiac unit for more tests. All heart checks I have had before have come back fine, blood pressure too and all of that. I'm pretty sure my heart is ok, I don't get dizzy or lightheaded with my panics and palps so I know I am lucky there. Anyway, will get results in a day or two.

My big problem now is no support from my husband :weep: He isn't a bad person, don't get me wrong, and I know he must be worried about me but his answer to everything is 'drink some wine' or take meds. I am taking Propranolol now and they are ok, just feel a bit tired. He really went mad at me last night when I complained of the heart palpitations saying 'just gulp some wine down !' But I know that will just make them worse. I asked him to please not shout and to show a bit of sympathy but he went barmy shouting at me and its not the first time. He is struggling I think with me being ill at the moment ( or thinking I'm ill !). Other areas of our marriage aren't too good, we barely speak to be honest. I sent him some info about panic and anxiety to his laptop ... This was a coup
E of weeks ago. I asked him the other night if he had read it and he just said, yeah I think I did :mad:

Sorry that this is so long ... any thoughts about the thyroid stuff and the palps ? Also has anyone had the same with your partners or family losing patience with you ?

Thanks, Lisa x

---------- Post added at 16:56 ---------- Previous post was at 13:59 ----------

Anyone ? :weep:

[TooMuchToLiveFor]

Hi, Lisa. :)

I am so sorry you are having such a hard time. It is good that your GP is caring and thorough. In my particular case, I was tested for thyroid and heart issues, but all has come back to anxiety.

My husband is actually very supportive, but it was/is still easy to feel alone in this at times as it is very hard to understand if you have not been through it. I can say that the encouragement of self-medicating with alcohol is NOT prudent guidance.

I have followed you throughout past threads, but I am sorry- I can't remember….what are you doing to treat your anxiety? I believe you went off your SSRIs?

[cloudbusting]

Hi TMTLF

Thank you for your reply, means a lot.

I have only been on Propranolol. I find them ok, just make me a bit tired.

I am really just managing it myself and it was working until this week ! CBT, breathing, mindfulness (which is really difficult !). Have been watching my diet and walking when I can. There's not much else you can do really is there ? :shrug:

I'm sorry to read that your own beast has reared up again of late. It's like we take our eye off the ball and *wham* ! It's like it says 'Not so fast sunshine !'.

I don't know if I will be pleased or not if the thyroid test comes back positive.

Thanks so much again :hugs:

Lisa x

[TooMuchToLiveFor]

Have you spoken with your GP about any other meds? Are you open to trying an SSRI? I did not find propanolol to work at all for panic for me.
The more I exercise the better I feel…..especially hard core cardio. Feels good to have my heart beating out of my chest for a real reason!

Would you and your hubby be willing to put some effort into some date nights? If you could feel reconnected with him it would help both of you.

[cloudbusting]

Hi again

Ummm, well I'm not at all keen on the idea of meds. I had to have my arm twisted just to take the beta blockers ! I know that they don't deal with the 'panic' side of things but I can use the CBT for that - I've not been so good at remembering all of the techniques if I'm honest, I need to gen up on Dr. Weekes again :)

It's such a complicated thing, this disorder, isn't it ?

I had my first panic attack 20 years ago not long after my dad died. I got through all of that but it left me a bit agoraphobic. Over the years it has come and gone but this time around it has been pretty 'full on' for 5 months or so.

I do enjoy a good walk with my dog, in fact we just got back from a morning walk and he is flaked out next to me.

As for my husband, well I'm not sure what to do there to be honest. We still love each other but there is a rift there. His seeming unwillingness to try and understand what's going on with me right now does hurt (don't get me wrong, I don't want endless discussions about it but I would at least like him to try and get the gist of what panic / anxiety disorder is all about and that there isn't necessarily a 'catch all' cure). This is just one thing, however - there are a few issues within our relationship that need some looking at. Maybe counselling would be a good idea.

Thanks for your replies, TMTLF xxx

[Seffie]

Hi I can relate to your experiences - having anxiety & palpitations on & off for years, being prone to agoraphobia-I don't give in but if symptoms are bad takes all my courage to go out, also lack of understanding from family & friends including husband. I accepted that other people don't understand & have little sympathy although it still annoys me but yes, like you, I expected my partner to at least be sympathetic even if he didn't get it but I think many partners lose patience because they just don't understand. I had a great therapist & my husband came to one of my appts & that helped him abit but tbh when I get symptoms now he doesn't get angry but just ignores me & what I'm saying. I've learnt to cope alone & have support from this forum & a few friends who also have symptoms but it is hard - Claire Weekes said that 'it's a lonely business' & she was right! I think counselling could help but only if he goes willingly.
Also, re: the palpitations, I'm not sure how old you are but (please don't be offended!) if you're in your early forties you could be in perimenopause - my palpitations were awful during this time & it's common to get palps with hormonal fluctuations especially if you're already prone to them.
Anyway, hope this helps some, just to know others have the same experience as you. I know that people who don't understand it think I'm a weak, delicate person but actually I know that I'm very strong & brave because it takes an enormous amount of courage just to step outside & go down the shops when you suffer from anxiety etc & very few of us get really good support from our families & friends. You are stronger than you think.
Take care
Seffie x

[cloudbusting]

Hi Seffie

Bless you and thank you for your lovely reply. It has helped me a lot to read this today :hugs:

I am 46 in May and have been reading up on perimenopause, it certainly seems to fit the bill ! Can I ask, did you use any supplements during this time ?

My blood tests for thyroid and other things has come back clear and I saw my GP today. She has advised me to try and manage the anxiety for a couple of weeks but if I have a bad episode with the palps again then to go back to see her and she will refer me to the cardiac unit.

It has taken me a while and a few setbacks but I am more confident now that this really is anxiety. I have recently discovered Eckhart Tolle and, along with Dr Weekes, I think I have a good 'two pronged' attack that I can use to tackle this now - plus the wonderful folks who post on here.

Have a good day, everybody

Lisa x

[Seffie]

Hi Lisa I did try a few different remedies during peri - all natural stuff but I found that these only helped for a while. There's a lot of trial & error involved & you have to just see what works for you. I felt Menopace helped for a while & also soy isoflavones - these definitely helped the hot flushes but after some post meno bleeding I stopped taking these as the gynae said that because they have a weak oestrogenic effect they aren't sure how it could affect breast tissue. I have several friends on HRT who swear by it but of course you have to weigh up the pro's & cons.

To be honest I just rode it out but probably the best things you can do are the obvious ones - eat healthy-ish, reduce caffeine, get enough sleep, reduce stress & try to be as calm as possible as much as possible ie: don't rush around, I try to 'float' through my day as Claire Weekes suggests!
The free CBT support pack on here is excellent as well & is helping me cope when I get symptoms.
Good luck!
Seffie x