feels like the end

[tracieann]

Please can someone help me I am feeling so bad I'm coming off citalopram I have been on 40mg and I'm down to 15mg. When I am off citalopram I am going on duloxetine but I've been unwell lately with gastritis flu and just feeling terrible I don't know if I'm really ill and not been diagnosed or it's my depression and anxiety but I feel like my life is ending and my time is short I don't know why I just do my Dr is good and assures me there is nothing serious I've just had blood and liver function kidney tests all done and normal but I feel as if my time is running out it's,awful I mean so so awful what is going on please help

[TooMuchToLiveFor]

Sweetie, since your GP has said all is well- you have to believe her. Sounds like you are in a bit of a panic loop. Terrible, isn't it? But, it makes sense since you are going off your meds at the same time you are sick, and then trying to start a new one.

Hang in there…..the days will pass and this will clear. (I am preaching myself the same exact sermon today.)

[tracieann]

Thanks too much I have this saying going through my head that some people say that a person who has past away KNEW their time was short and it's stuck in my head that because I feel so bad I am not going to live much longer and I'm looking for subliminal messages and freaking out it's scary I'm only 50 and not ready to go yet but just want to feel normal

[TooMuchToLiveFor]

You will….your tired mind and nervous system are just messing with you.

May I recommend downloading the free CBT course from here to help you with your thought processes?

[tracieann]

Thank you for your replies they help I will try the cbt on here my mind is tired with being ill and life's problems there is so much precious in life

[tracieann]

Oh today a lady I know told me I have lost a lot of weight and bang I'm back to square one I have been so pale and tired and tummy problems for a month now I had blood tests which all came back normal but coming off antidepressants so hard they weren't working any more I have lost about 5lb in three weeks can anxiety make you lose weight I'm scared something sinister may be going,on but I also have terrible feelings of impending doom it's really scaring me am I going mad help please

[TooMuchToLiveFor]

I lost almost 30 pounds in three weeks. I had a baby three months prior, so I had a little to lose- but in general I am very athletic and slender…..everybody was commenting on how much weight I had lost and thought I was doing something unhealthy to lose my baby weight. I always replied, "Well, it's not for everyone, but try having a nervous breakdown….does wonders for your waistline." :winks:

(Remember- you have also had the flu along with switching meds, and dealing with anxiety/depression. Losing weight with all this would be very normal.)

[tracieann]

wow that's some weight loss it's just I always associate weight loss with serious illness and not really much else but I know deep down inside depression and anxiety can make you lose weight thank you Toomuchtolivefor for your kind words of support I think I will be glad to start new meds might stop the feeling of fear and doom which is plaguing me a lot of the rime

[dudka]

I'm feeling the same way as you- if that;s any help:) my doctor wants me to go off Venlafaxine and go back on citalopram so it's the first day today when Ive dropped from 110 mg Venlafaxine to 37,5:mad: I'm scared as hell because I don't know what to expect.

[tracieann]

Dudka medication changes can be awful been on cit for 8 years a.d on 40mg for about 3 and a half years been weaning off for 5 months to try avoid side effects but lately cancer phobia is dreadful again worrying myself half to death waiting to get stomach cancer it's crap be ing like this hoping to start on duloxetine soon thank heavens just hope theirs no serious disease going on with me best of luck with your meds

[EnoughAlready]

I feel your pain - I get mild anxiety and IBS. Since lunchtime I have felt like a dark cloud is coming over me and I am getting pains in my chest and I feel totally drained and sick as a dog. Feel like breathing is difficult and wndering what the hell is wrong. I am hopng/assuming its just anxiety or onset of tummy bug or flu or something :(

Am sure I'll be ok in a few days but its horrid going through it, talking on here helps

[tracieann]

Sorry to hear your not feeling too good Enough already the anxiety just wears you down I have felt like I can.t fight my monster anymore because im tired both physically and mentally but part of me knows I can't let this win sounds to me like you may have start of some virus there's lots going around I hope you feel better soon and keep fighting take care

[paula78]

Aww TracieAnn I know how you feel, I'm in a bad place right now an have been told I have anxiety! I have fear of taking medication too so it takes me ages to be able to take meds then I give up after several days! At the moment I have a overwhelming fear of terminal illness because of sharp chest pains and a bad cough! My doctor says my chest is clear but I'm not convinced, maybe it is the anxiety taking over, the more I think about the pain the wirse it does actually get, does anyone else feel this way! TracieAnn I hope you feel much better soon, I really do understand :) xxxx

[EnoughAlready]

Thanks TA - hope you feel better soon too :)

[dudka]

tracieann, I'm on oxazepam now (3 times a day) so the first day today was quite good. in fact it was the first quite normal day for the last 2 months. I also have a cancer phobia:D but I was rather thinking that I;ve got brain cancer because of all these horrible things happening in my head :ohmy: sounds ridiculous I know but I can't help it:mad::mad:

---------- Post added at 22:46 ---------- Previous post was at 22:40 ----------

but the 'good thing ' is that we all feel similar- so even if we are so far away from each other and we don't know each other that still means that we are not alone and not totally crazy:yahoo:

[paula78]

Dudka I sympathise I know where your coming from I have the greatest fear of cancer, I'm really down with it! The thing is I go mad because I feel my GP isn't diagnosing me correctly an then I'd be too scared to hear anything different! Sometimes I dnt know myself or why this is happening, I have so many physical symptoms even whilst I type this msg I spend all my time in tears, I have another appointment with my GP tomorrow and I was going to ask about Prozac I heard that was good for depression and anxiety! I am sure we'll all be fine someday and hopefully we can help eachother through the tough times, keep your chin up thinking of you all

[tracieann]

Thanks dudka and paula78 had cancer phobia for eleven years lost My Mum my best friend who was only 43 and now my dad has end stage leukaemia I hate this disease with all my being but still fear it so much I work in a hospital and see this on a regular basis but I feel safer working there as I can get help or advice that said I love my job I just wonder when this fight will end for me will I overcome this or will my body end up with this dreaded illness people have no idea how terrible anxiety is and what we all suffer please keep in touch were all in the same boat tc

[MyNameIsTerry]

Aww TracieAnn I know how you feel, I'm in a bad place right now an have been told I have anxiety! I have fear of taking medication too so it takes me ages to be able to take meds then I give up after several days! At the moment I have a overwhelming fear of terminal illness because of sharp chest pains and a bad cough! My doctor says my chest is clear but I'm not convinced, maybe it is the anxiety taking over, the more I think about the pain the wirse it does actually get, does anyone else feel this way! TracieAnn I hope you feel much better soon, I really do understand :) xxxx

Did the cough come before the sharp chest pains? If so, it could be muscular pain due to all the coughing. Anxiety has chest tightness in it's arsenal of self destruction tools so it could be that. Your GP can always test your heart and lungs if they think there is a problem. The test chests for infections all the time so they should be well adept at checking that.

Is your chest tightness more the diaphragm? I get this a lot and I always thought it was my chest but I know now that it's too low down. I have asthma so anything affecting my chest tends to associate with that but I know thats a different feeling as I struggle to breath as opposed to struggle to feel less tight. The reason I know it's my diaphragm and surrounding muscles if because whilst I've put weight on, the top of my abs are rock hard as if I've been doing thousands of sit ups over the past years...and trust me, I haven't and need to but it's left me with extra muscle there. My CBT therapist said she had a colleague the same but in a difference area where he was constantly tensing.

---------- Post added at 06:03 ---------- Previous post was at 05:59 ----------


Thanks dudka and paula78 had cancer phobia for eleven years lost My Mum my best friend who was only 43 and now my dad has end stage leukaemia I hate this disease with all my being but still fear it so much I work in a hospital and see this on a regular basis but I feel safer working there as I can get help or advice that said I love my job I just wonder when this fight will end for me will I overcome this or will my body end up with this dreaded illness people have no idea how terrible anxiety is and what we all suffer please keep in touch were all in the same boat tc

You might be struggling more due to the side effects so brave it out and see if it improves. I've always resisted medication changes because I hot rock bottom when I go them and spend months clawing myself back to the mess I was in before I even started them.

I was on Citalopram at 20mg the first time but this time it's Duloxetine. It won't cause you insomnia like Citalopram does, which is a good thing as that just makes it harder, but I found the side effects different in some respects. It was less continual as I had bad weeks and good weeks until I adjusted. You may also get some adrenaline rushes, but they can't hurt you, you may just feel like you want to run the 4 minute mile faster than Usain Bolt does the 100m!!! That wears off pretty quickly, or did so for me.

So, if you feel a bit different, I would say try to be open minded with it because it could just be the medication.

[paula78]

Aww thanks guys it means so much to be able to talk. I'm new to all this and have only been suffering since november! I started with the cough after my chest has started to hurt! I've had a really bad night and cried myself to sleep I had pains everywhere it was awful! I had pains in my chest although no coughing I had pain all around my belly button that was awful and around my sides into my back, this morning the pain has subsided a bit but I'm all panicky! Tracie Ann, I do understand hunny I have 2 friends one with breast cancer an the other with lung cancer, I also lost my father in law last year to cancer and a sudden heart attack and then in november my mum had 3 large ruptured brain aneyursms, I was with my mum when this happened infact she had to be revived in the back of the ambulance an I was with her then it was awful, I'm convinced that all this is going to happen to me if not allready!! I dnt even knw what medication would be best but only a small dosage to start with any ideas? Xxxx

[tracieann]

Well I'm no expert if you can cope without meds do it Paula hun but if not go for a low dose antidepressants that treats anxiety think long and hard sweetie and discuss in detail with your Dr you have had one hell of a time you poor soul no.wonder we end up.feeling so crappy when it's awful like.this they say everyone has some crap in life yeah some some step in dog.doodoo others have a manure factory lol well.we.have to.laugh at.something don't we don't be stuck if you need to chat tc

[paula78]

Aww thankyou TA, it means so much, like I said I'm new to the nmp forum infact I dnt really talk to anyone about it as they dnt quite understand! I just dnt wanna feel this way anymore the physical symptoms are out weighing any mental or emotional symptoms an I'm petrified I have something more wrong than anxiety, I just dnt knw what to do, hope you okay today Tracie :) x

[tracieann]

Hi Paula I understand so well how bad this is there are times in the past I have been 100 percent certain that I'm terminal and while it's great to be declared healthy you soon forget when your next lot of symptoms start sometimes I think ha is the worst thing of all to be diagnosed with psychologically I hate it hope your day is ok

[paula78]

Hi Tracey yeah I'm not too bad an I've just been to see my gp who has prescribe seratin or summet sorry bout the spelling! She says my chests clear but my bp was quite high as I had a panic attack in the doctors, I wonder if this chest pain could be caused by acid reflux cos I get a lot of heartburn and indegestion and trapped wind an that apparently hurts all your chest! Do you know anything about this? Xxx

[tracieann]

Oh do I hun I could write a book on stomach acid I have long term gastritis which is caused by acid secretion and I have to take medication daily if your reflux flows back up it does hurt your chest and can be really painful check what meds Dr has put you on is it a serotonin inhibitor (ssri)tc:hugs:

[paula78]

Hi tracie I'm not sure what its called cos they didn't have it at the chemist so I have to collect it tomorrow! Maybe it is my reflux but suddenly this evening about 20 mins ago I hard a hard shooting pain right in my heart! Its scared me oh why is this such a cruel thing to have! Feeling low :( hope your okay tho hunny and your not having a bad evening xx

[tracieann]

Poor love that sharp pain can be due to muscle pain I had something called costochondritis which gave me like a stabbing pain and I thought it was heart but they did ecg and blood tests,at a and e it was this yours could be this made worse by your anx if it gets very severe get checked out always be safe my day so far has been panic low panic low so up and down literally hoped u ok

[paula78]

I'm having a weird day tracie I'm really quiet and feel very lost I was okat till lunchtime then I started to feel a lil out of breath and have a strange feeling all in my chest and my bust! People say that's quite normal with anxiety but its driving me mad, its feels like trapped wind but right at the top of my chest :( I also have the lump in my throat feeling :( hope your okay, if your online later I'll be ere for a chat :) x

[dudka]

how are you guys today? any better?

[tracieann]

Hi guys hope.you are both ok Paula love I'm sure your anx is making you feel like this love you feel very low,when anx at it's worst I went out for a 40 minute walk with my daughter and now I'm getting whacked by my fibromyalgia as cutting down the antidepressants makes pain receptors stronger my bloody knees and legs ache think me and you are ready for knackers g yard Paula why don't you pm me xx

[paula78]

Have u pm me its sayin I have a pm but it wnt let me open, how do I do this hahaha christ I've been workin on computers an sending mails for yrs n yrs an I cnt bloody do this lol x

[tracieann]

I have sweetheart whether I've sent it properly is another matter I think I might have sent it three times oops what a pair we are