Getting anxious over the thought of being anxious?

[Charlotteee89]

Anyone else get this? I think it's called Anticipatory Anxiety?

My anxiety has been horrendous for 4.5 weeks now after having a panic attack out of the blue. I've suffering from 2 different obsessive/intrusive thoughts that are causing my anxiety right now (If it wasn't for those thoughts I think I'd be okay).

But it's like as soon as I'm not anxious my mind suddenly goes "Oooo you're not anxious!" & BAM the anxiety re-appears. I'm constantly checking myself to see if I'm anxious.. Almost like something is wrong if I'm not anxious? :wacko: & When I'm not feeling anxious my mind will chuck an obsessive thought in my head just to see how I react... :wacko:

I seem to be getting equally anxious over basically nothing rather than just anxious over my obsessive thoughts/thinking. I'm really struggling to 'override' it.

Also, I normally get a taxi to work & I now tend to feel queezy in the taxi (a combo of travel sickness & feeling anxious anyway) so now I'm getting anxious over the thought of being anxious in the taxi... :doh:

My first session of CBT is on Thurs though, thankfully!

[NE21 worrier]

Hi Charlotte,

Fear of fear is effectively what anxiety is. Anxiousness is not necessarily a "bad" emotion in the right context - its purpose of course being to warn us and protect us of real danger over however many thousands of years humans have lived.

Now, of course, being in a taxi is not generally a situation of real danger and so it is the fear of your fear which is keeping you truly trapped in your anxiety. Although the first session is largely exploratory, re-programming your brain is ultimately exactly what you will learn about in your CBT sessions.

It sounds simple but it is, in fact, quite difficult. Nevertheless, with practice, you will eventually learn just to accept every little strange sensation or thought for what it is so that it does not bother you so much. These sensations and thoughts will then lose their power over you, and you will then feel less and less anxious.

The road is not a straight one - there will be blips (I've just had one tonight!) - but I know the road is clearer, certainly clearer than it seemed before I had my own sessions of CBT in the autumn of last year.

Good luck and keep posting,
Peter :)

[Charlotteee89]

Yeah, a few weeks a go I had a mini panic attack whilst in a taxi so I think that's what I'm scared off every time I get in one. :doh: Thoughts like "Right, how do I feel?" "Am I okay, yes I'm okay..." "Oooo I feel a bit queezy, okay right, just ignore it..." go through my head whilst I'm in one now.

I'm trying to re-wire my brain by positive thinking - it's not easy though! Sometimes those negative thougths can overwhelm you & convince you they're true.

& Yes I know, I'm just happy that I'm actually getting help... I know it will take a while for the CBT to take affect. But I'm determined it will. :)

The fact that I'm already noticing the thought patterns & cycles as anxiety in the first place is a good start, my Therapist said. I just want to learn ways to not let my negative thoughts over power me, I want to be able to just shove them away & see them as nothing.

I just want to feel 'normal' again, I hate that my anxiety is crippling me, making me waste my days being an anxious, panicky mess. I just want to live my life & think 'normally' without over-thinking & over-analyzing everything.

Ah well, it WILL happen. :yesyes:

[LiveAboveIt]

I'm going through the same issue that you are, Charlotte.
It's getting better with each passing day, though. I've had this current battle with anxiety for about 4.5 weeks now, like you.

Live in today.. Don't worry about the future. I know that it's easier said than done, but we need to try. Worrying about worrying is only going to cause more worrying. And that's no way to live life.