What if?

[Barnabas75]

What if I have this? What if I have that? What if this happens? What if that happens? What if I cant do this or that? What if it does not happen?What if they think this or that?What if I cant get it? What if I am driving and have an accident? What if,what if? There are so many what ifs that if I let the what ifs rule my life I will get fearful and anxious.How do I change the what ifs in my mind?Some caution is nesseccary but what if I am overdoing the what ifs? So what?:shrug:

[Tanner40]

Barnabas, you can change the "what if's" by living in the present day. There are a million what if's out there but there is always one today. Try to focus on three good things thatnhappen each day.
CBT is also extremely helpful for the what if's. It is your irrational thoughts leading you to the what if's. Trying to predict the future or mind reading ( trying to predict what others are thinking). There is a free CBT class online which I find very helpful. Consistent daily practice of the tools of CBT can be extremely helpful. Why not give it a go.

[paula78]

The what ifs have taken over my life too and I'm awaiting my first appointment with cbt, I have so many different physical symptoms that I'm not convinced its just anxiety, which then causes more anxiety god its awful, but the more I visit this site the more I realise that actually I'm not alone so today I'm saying to myself what if this is just anxiety! Feel free to msg me an let me know how you get on itd be great to hear from someone who's suffering the same :( xx

[Fishmanpa]

Interestingly enough, I've always thought of "What If's" in pertaining to the things we "didn't do" as opposed to the unknown.

One of the saddest things in life for me are seeing those standing on the edge in life and never stepping off for fear of "What If?" Granted, sometimes the water is deep and cold but for me, I've always thought the worst that can happen is we get a little wet. But we know how to swim, won't drown and there are towels in the linen closet. (I posted a similar thing on another thread).

In life it's not the fear of what may happen, it's the fear of thinking about what would have happened. The last thing I want to do when I'm on my death bed is think about "What If's".

Positive thoughts

[nomorepanic]

You change the "What If" to "So what"

[MrAndy]

what if morrisons run out of doughnuts,simples I go to Tescos

[Fishmanpa]

You change the "What If" to "So what"

There's a saying I use often in my line of work.

"Some will. Some won't. So What?! NEXT"

Positive thoughts

[nomorepanic]

I know that one too FMP

[Barnabas75]

Thanks everyone for kindly replying.(Andy,FMP,Tanner,Nic,Paula..I may take you up and write someday..feel welcome to write to me also)

Feels like I am standing at the exit of the City of What if..Feels like I am looking up at the City of I Can Do..However there is a treacherous vally to cross where a fire breathing dragon lives and a whispering forest that whispers why bother,why try,wont you fail again,is it worth it?..

I was told the dragon is on a chain and that if I keep to a certain path I would be safe...but the rivine of doubt is nearby and the then there is the troll of but this, and but that, to contend with also.Then the lastly there is the desert of excuses,where the king of excuses lives...regardless of these I feel an inward urge to press on....have a great weekend all..:unsure:

[MyNameIsTerry]

Build a bridge of acceptance & trust over the ravine, the troll can then live under that whilst you pass over safely. Change the troll to the breed with a nose shaped like a penis like in that film Troll Hunter, name him appropriately and laugh at him.

What ifs are natural, every non anxious person has them. They are healthy as they are part of the side of you that tries to keep you safe. Normally, your subconscious would probably be doing them without you knowing and you would have trusted this. Learn to trust yourself again.

[MRS STRESS ED]

Hi Greg dont change the what if just say what if it doesnt happen ,what im happy what if nothing bad happens what if im healthy what if everything is good ,that means you can live happy stay positive x

[Barnabas75]

Thanks Mrs Stressed and Terry

I just dont want to miss a great opportunity thats coming my way.