Round in circles
15-03-14, 17:24
Been feeling a bit funny all afternoon. I assumed at was because I was stressed from going to the supermarket on a Saturday, or because I ate junk food that I shouldn't really eat. But in the past half hour the slightly dizzy/spacey feeling has gotten worse and I've now gotten tongue cramps along with a scratchy throat.
Anyway, that's led me to think I'm probably feeling funny because I binged and purged when I got home. I have bulimia and ever since Xmas it's been really out of control, and my worry is that my potassium is out of whack. I hate this. I get so worried over it, ever since the time I was told I was one step away from "your heart could stop at any time". It's like this invisible monster in my life, waiting to get me. The worst part is, when it got really low there were no obvious physical symptoms to tell me something was wrong. That's the bit that scared me the most. My potassium doesn't get regularly monitored anymore. I forced my levels back up by eating baked potatoes every day so I could get off those awful tasting potassium tablets, and since then there's been no support for it. If I turn up every 6 months or so and ask for a blood test, the GP is happy to do that, but other than that I'm on my own.
I'm feeling really panicky, but so far am just about managing to suppress it into the box labelled "concerned". I can't wait till tomorrow comes and I can get back to feeling "normal".
Anyway, that's led me to think I'm probably feeling funny because I binged and purged when I got home. I have bulimia and ever since Xmas it's been really out of control, and my worry is that my potassium is out of whack. I hate this. I get so worried over it, ever since the time I was told I was one step away from "your heart could stop at any time". It's like this invisible monster in my life, waiting to get me. The worst part is, when it got really low there were no obvious physical symptoms to tell me something was wrong. That's the bit that scared me the most. My potassium doesn't get regularly monitored anymore. I forced my levels back up by eating baked potatoes every day so I could get off those awful tasting potassium tablets, and since then there's been no support for it. If I turn up every 6 months or so and ask for a blood test, the GP is happy to do that, but other than that I'm on my own.
I'm feeling really panicky, but so far am just about managing to suppress it into the box labelled "concerned". I can't wait till tomorrow comes and I can get back to feeling "normal".