Frightened

[PanickyPolly]

Hey everyone...

I wonder if you can send positive vibes my way as I'm not feeling so good. My anger bouts are increasing to every day now and I don't feel safe. I also feel very disorientated, don't know wher I am and am sort of hearing voices. I feel seriously ill. I can't get peace from anywhere. Doesn't help I living my own, see no one and have been abandoned by everyone. Am seeing my doctor tomorrow morning first thing and asking her to refer me as an emergency to a psychiatrist.

I can't believe how much I've gone down hill in just a few weeks.

[mooks]

polly huge hugs & good vibes...glad your're taking my advice and getting firm with your GP...sometimes thats what it takes...
have you any family that can helpxx

[PanickyPolly]

Thanks Mooks and no I have absolutely no-one. My one and only family member who wants to speak to me is my mother but she's an alcoholic and the one who abused me as a child and I can't be around hre without freaking out. none of my freinds speak to me anymore or ring to find out how I am. The only person I have is my step dad but he has some issues of his own and can be very strange. I know that probably sounds rich coming from me but you have to meet him to see for yourself. He is also quite deaf so I can't talk to him as he can't hear me.

[sgp64]

Lots of pos vibes coming your way from me Polly. I live on my own too..its tough and I too can feel abandoned. PM me anytime you wanna let off some steam/chat and best of luck with your GP!

Sean

[mooks]

Hi
Polly sorry to hear that..inists on seeing a counsellor...they can become a real crutch for you each week...if you GP is slow on doing this contact MIND..they will find you one and at least you will have someone to talk to and help youxxx

[PanickyPolly]

Tried counsellors Mooks and they only made me worse as a lot of my symptoms they didn't understand. Mind were the worst offenders!!!!

[yorkylover]

((((((((((((((((((((BIG HUG FOR YOU)))))))))))))))))):);):)
love

Ellen XX

[PanickyPolly]

Thanks...if you guys believe in praying can you send a few up for me please? I don't care who you pray to I just need prayers. I never normally ask people to do that but I've reached a point where I know I can't go on. So far throughout my life I've been able to fight but I feel I just can't fight anymore. I need to see a psychologist asap.

[rosebud]

Hi Polly

So sorry to hear you are having such a bad time of it.
I really hope you get the help you need.
Sending you lots of hugs.
Traceyxxx

[mooks]

polly
a friend of mine was in a similar situation to you....she was getting nowhere with her GP...so she went to see him again and refused to leave his office till he helped...I used a similar tactic on my Gp and got an emergency appointment with a Psych...what im saying is....be very firm this time...be honest tell him what is going through your mind...
keep in touch xx

[clickaway]

Hugs Polly

I too live on my own and know its not easy. But do you have any internet friends?

Take Care,


Ray


http://www.anxietyrelease.org.uk/

And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance, I hope you dance.
~Mark Sanders and Tia Sillers

[PITITA]

(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS TO POLLY)))))))))))))))))))))))))))

I WILL pray for you tonight that your GP shall help you tomorrow and also for you to be strong and find peace!

I just said the prayer. I will just say a reminder one just before I go to bed!

Love and Peace to you!!!! xxxxx

"If you magnify your imperfections and minimize your good points, you're guaranteed to feel inferior. But the problem isn't YOU its- its the crazy lenses you are wearing! " Feeling Good handbook

[PanickyPolly]

Thanks everyone for your support. I went today and I'm not sure how it went as I was in state. I asked first for an amergency referal to a clinical psychologist and that I felt I was a danger to myself and others and she got on the phone and asked the CPN to call me asap and that I needed t be asessed for psychological evaluation or something like that. I asked her why I couldn't get an emergency appointment to see a psychologist and she said it doesn't work like that and I said well why not get an emergency appt with a psychitarist and she said I could but she thinks it would be pointless as I might end up seeing a junior doctor. She said 'I know you...you wouldn't like him and you'd fall out'. Don't know how she can see she knows me after only knowing me since August. However the CPN rang me at midday and made an appointment for me to see her tomorrow at the risk assement unit. I hope I get everything out ok and manage to give her a clear pitcure of what is wrong as I sometimes (unwillingly) cover things up. I don't know I'm doing until I've done it. I also tend to get giggly as it's a cover and I can't snap out if it. then thre's my moods. I can switch in and out of them sometimes at will...this morning for instance I was in an angry, depressed state then I went to Spanish class later in the morning and was as high as a kite. Anyway I cosole myself with the fact that I am in the right place at a psychiatric hospital and that if they feel I am in danger they will refer me immediately. I asked my GP if they'd do this and she said she wasn't sure which was kind of exasperating. Think she's getting a bit sick of me going back and fore and finds it funny. Wish I saw teh funny side. Yet she did sort it out for me so that shows she's caring. I guess GPs just feel they have to treat you like naughty children. Funny how you manage to come out feeling scolded. What you think guys?

[Chopper]

Try to be strong Polly, with your friends in this ether and professional help you can pull through. There are a lot of us out here who can empathise and wish you noting but good thoughts.[^]

Happiness and light to all,
'Chopper'

I saw her once, one little while, and then no more:
’Twas Eden’s light on Earth a while, and then no more.
Amid the throng she passed along the meadow-floor:
Spring seemed to smile on Earth awhile, and then no more;
But whence she came, which way she went, what garb she wore
I noted not; I gazed a while, and then no more!

James Clarence Mangan 1803 - 1849

[mick]

hi Polly
hang on in there love,weve all been there at some stage or another we duck and dive bob and weave through this b..t..d illness but we get there in the end you have lots of mates on this site and we all care and understand,if you can try reiki,indian face massage,crystal healing,hypnotherapyetc i tried all of these and still use them from time to time when i slip back into my problems,whilst not miracle cures they have definatlley made me a calmer more positive person
good luck
Mick

[PanickyPolly]

Thanks again guys...just now got back from the hospital where I saw the CPN. She was very nice nad it went quite well I think. We didn't haev much time as I was late but I told her my worst symptoms. I think she is going to refer me to a clinic psychologist but she said she needs to get a bigger picture of my past and background first.

Was deeply depressed earlier then got terribly anxious then went on a high (so much so I felt dizzy) now I'm fairly stable.