Really anxious today

[sandie]

Yesterday and today my anxiety levels have really increased. I had a good Saturday and reasonable Sunday, but I'm now shivery, tired, tense and although the palpitations aren't too bad, the tigthening in my chest is quite painful. I've tried stretching, breathing and I've taken my rescue remedy (as well as my propanalol). I really feel soooo tired. I would love to be able to just stretch out relax and sleep for an hour or 2. I was awake at just after 3 this morning, dozed until a little after 4 and then was awake - tired but awake.

Can anyone out there reassure me that when the stress in my life finally dissipates (as I dearly hope it will), this anxiety and the need for medication wil be gone. I would so very much like to return to a 'normal' life, free of pills, potions and lack of sleep.

I know that so of the issues that have contributed to the anxiety are deep-rooted and that I will have to eventually address them. I think CBT would help - but is it expensive or available on the NHS. As with so many other people, lack of money/loss of job, is at the root of my (our) stress at the moment, but my husband is coping incredibly well - it's me who's fallen apart.

[halfwayhome]

I wish I could reassure you that it will go away one day, but the truth is, I don't know. I know for me when stress is lower, my anxiety is more manageable.. but it's always there.

I know how you feel with regards to not liking a life of medication. I've been off anti-anxiety medication for years now, and trying to find the courage to go back on. I'm in a horrible place of desperately NOT wanting to take the medication, but knowing that in order to feel better, I should.

I hope that your anxiety becomes more manageable for you soon. Try to get some sleep - my anxiety has been at its highest in a LONG time for the past week or so, and I barely sleep. I think I've slept about ten hours the past three nights combined. I keep waking up already in a state of panic.

Good luck to you.

"don't worry.. be happy!
[don't worry - be happy"

xoxox
Steph

[LickeyEndBlues]

Hey Sandie,

Yes it will get better, Yes you wil be off meds, Yes you wil return to "normal"!!!

I feel that when we have good days we do enjoy the progress, but when we then have a bummer we tend to feel, "Oh know!!!". Look at the good days as progress and use them to reinforce how you are getting better. The bad days wil happen but remember, a good one is just around the corner.

Being aware that some problems are deep rooted is half the solution, again you are already addressing them. Suportive therapies will just enhance that.

Remember...you are not alone in here.

Take care

Iain

What's so funny about peace, love and understanding?

[Gribbley]

Hello Sandie.

Complete newbie to this site, so I hope I'm not saying the wrong things, but I'm sorry you're stress levels are up at the moment. You can get CBT on the NHS. I am attending an NHS-run course at the moment and I would definitely recommend it for helping you deal with anxiety/stress. However, I guess (as with everything on the NHS) it may depend on where you live (I'm SW London). Have a chat to your GP (assuming s/he is sympathetic) about stress management groups/workshops - that's what mine is called, although it's essentially a CBT course.

Also I've found that very frequent repeating of those controlled breathing/relaxation exercises (whether you're feeling stressed or not at the time) seems to help lower the levels overall. Without wishing to come over all "tofu and sandals", I've found that visualisation exercises also help when I'm having a bad moment, to take me away to my "happy place" and help slow down the heartbeat.

There I go, typical bloke, offering solutions rather than empathy! I do feel for you though, I know how crap the bad days can be, and how low the stress/tiredness circle can make you feel. Here's hoping you feel better tomorrow.



"Some days I wonder why I bother chewing through the leather straps."

[sgp64]

Hi Sandie

sorry to hear you're struggling a bit but, as Iain says, you can and will get better. Like you I realise there are some deep rooted issues that lie behind my anxiety. Recognising that is a big step on the road to being well.

Good to see you here!

Sean

[manmoor]

Hi Sandie,

Hugs for you and I hope you feel better soon. This wee blip will pass. xo

Take Care

Mandyxx

[sandie]

Thanks guys for your concern and replies; the more I hear about CBT I think it is probably the route to take. I've tried Paul McKennas Trance download which I think could be very helpful (it's quite relaxing and fuill of reaffirmations etc), but I can't stop my mind from wandering back onto the problems that are causing my anxiety. Ive listened to it several times(each time through headphones), in a darkened quiet room, stretched out on the sofa (I think part of me hopes it will send me to sleep). But it's such a temporary and partial release of tension.

I would dearly love to go and have a nap - but sleep seems so difficult at the moment. No problem getting to sleep, I just wake up soooo early, not feeling at all rested.

I'm trying distraction techniques, but I really just want to doze in front of the TV.

Its a terrible vicious circle; no money so can't get out. I live in a very rural area so I feel isolated; when I go out walking I spend my time just thinking about the problems, so I'm not using up the adrenaline causing the anxiety.

[yorkylover]

Hi sandie,hope you feel better soon.(((((((((((((BIG HUG))))))))))));)

Ellen XX

[mick]

hi Sandie
sorry to hear your going through it at the moment it will get better a promise you but it takes time,just try to be patient [the walk of a thousand miles has to start with a single step] thats an ancient chinese proverb and one of my favourite mantras
take care
Mick

[pinkrhian]

Hi sadie

All this sounds soooo like what i get. Do you get the simptoms often? When i cant sleep even tho i am so tired i can lay awake practically all night just wishing i could sleep. I sometimes take sleeping tablets and they tend to help me get some kind of sleep. Palpatations i get all the time but the gp has given me beater blockers to help control that and they do help. Relaxing is all about finding a space on ur own and laying down somewhere comfortable...think about a time u was on holiday and laying in the sun with the sound of the sea in the background, try to imagin u r getting lighter like the negative thoughts are running out of your fingertips, even if it is just for a few mins it is a start. I am a sufferer, but it does tend to pass.....i hope you feel better soon x

[bjaques]

Hi Sandie,

Anxiety does get painful after a while. I am using the same combination of propranalol (2 x 40mg), and rescue remendy which I found today. I have been having the same sleep pattern for a couple of weeks now. Not more than 2 hours and not restfull

Propranalol does seem to limit the extent of the panic but am feeling wired what feels like constantly.

Anyway the point or replying was that today I also got some sleeping tablets (Zopiclone) fro my GP. This is not something which is intended as a long term fix (up to 5 days), but a short term means to break the lack of sleep cycle, and hopefully give me the breathing space to deal with the Anxiety. I would be gratefull for anyones thoughts on this, and will let you know if it helps!

I hope you feel better soon!!
Ben

[mooks]

hi sandie
sorry to hear your bad...like the others ive had this for a long time...but have had times med free and ok...what ive realised is that ive allowed the anxiety to control me....it may start with a negative thinking pattern then snowball...im having cbt...it is available on NHS you have to insist on it
xx

[Helenas2]

Hi Sandie
Sorry to hear you are going through a low at the moment
I am suffering from anxiety and panic at night - and have fear of going to bed and falling asleep - as thats when it kicks in - at the moment i am doing everything in my power not to go to bed. I clean the flat at 11.00pm, I read old magazines, tidy cupboards anything! then i pop a couple of 'Calms nightime' and a couple of squirts of rescue remedy and then litereally fall on the bed exhausted - then I have to be up at 6.00am for work - at the moment i feel like a complete zombie! vicious cycle..... and today i read in the metro about the guy on O.D'd on sleeping tablets nytol ( which also live in my kitchen cupboard)
I have recently come off the anti - depressants and am clutching at anything that can help - I have my good days and i have my bad days - I try hard to enjoy and really cherish every moment of the good - and pray for more.
You are not alone - we are all here to support eachother xx smile and love life x x x[:X]

[sandie]

Hello bjaques

In addition to 3x40 mg propanlol, I am also taking zopiclone (Zimovane). I have been taking it for about 6 weeks now. I have no problem getting to sleep -glass of warm milk, plus tablet. However, I just about manage 4 hours and then spend the early hours thinking about all the issues causing my anxiety and stress.

As a result, whilst the palpitations are much better, I now get a tightening across the chest which starts early in the morning and unless I keep distracted or physically very active, remains with me.

I'm hoping to talk to my GP about CBT - I think it could probably help with some of the deep rooted issues I have as well as helping me cope with the negative attitude I take towards my life and problems.

Until now, I never realised that PAs and anxiety could make someone feel soooooooooo dreadful physically. The palpitations, shivering, sweating, chest tightness, make you feel so bad on some days you just want to give up.

I would dearly love to manage some more sleep; the GP did give me valium initially as a quick fix to break the insomnia, but it didn't work. I am told that there aren't the same dependency issues with zimovane/zopiclone.

Sandie

[sandie]

Hello Helenas 2

Thanks for your response. This anxiety thing is so new to me it's knocked me completely off balance. I'm finding it hard to leave the house, not tiring myself out sufficiently to sleep solidly I suspect. I wish I were on the more natural remedies instead of sleeping tablets. Do you find the remedy spray more effective than the drops? I sip water all day - liberally laced with Bach remedy. I think it has ben helping. I put drops on my tongue also during the day and just before bed.

I look forward to the day when I no longer need meds.

Sandie

[kittykat]

Hi sandie,
sorry to hear your not so great, i don't know if we will ever truly be free of it i live in hope. You can get CBT on the NHS i am currently under going it , its still early days for me though, but i have been forced to go on meds as well as i really wasn't coping...........so fingers crossed. I'm sure you'll get through this difficult patch espescially with all the help and support from this site , i wish you all the best , and ask your doc about CBT

Take care
shirley xx

[batchelor]

Hi- Yes things CAN get amazingly better. I was floundering horribly, desperate and see that it was just a trap I was mentally weaving around myself. Nervous of this chat room forum stuff I found this site by chance and in such distress at how panicky I was, continually over the past year, I decided to tackle things big style, and have now had six weeks acupuncture, and a specific chinese herbal tea, which has made a massive difference to me. My friend say that I wont really know if its either the treatmentor my mental approach to having confronted this spiral of panic, but I actually dont mind whatever the remedy is, its made a huge difference. I couldnt ever imagine being so relaxed and calm again. I had actually forgotten what it felt like to lie there, not asleep but just so deeply relaxed. I imagine that I am floating on a lilo water bed in a nice warm swimmingpool on a sunny day. I hope that you can find this of some use, I am trying to say that things can get better even if you cannot see it at first. I also confess to saying prayers that I get over this horrendous phase in my life, and I give thanks for the days where there has been an improvement., and I can be a Normal Mummy for my three youngsters.

[sandie]

Hi everyone

I had a really good day yesterday- full of distraction and activity. We also had a little positive news which made me feel better. Amazingly I slept better than I have done in weeks - almost 6 hours solid (my norm is 3-4 hours).

So why do I feel so panicky this morning? I'm terribly tired and sleepy too. Constant negative and anxious thoughts just keep popping into my head - I'm worrying about absolutely everything. I'm drinking/spraying my Bachs remedy constantly.

The more I think about some of what I'm thinking, the more I realise that soooooooo manh of my issues are deep-rooted and learnt; I think I'll download the free online CBT course to see if it helps. Has any one tried the online Living Life to the Full course? Has it helped?

Sandie

[sandlin]

Hi

Take each day hour by hour which may seem drastic but then look at how many hours you were okay for. today i had a panic on the way home from taking son to school but made it home. Was then worried that i would never leave house but made myself go to asda and now feel much calmer.

Got cbt appt on 20th dec so it is out there.

Linda xx

[sandie]

Thanks Sandlin

I can't believe how dreadful I feel today - especially compared to yesterday. It's the worse I've felt for a LONG time. Dreadfully negative thoughts - tearful, irrational - I can't believe how bad I am.

I had such a good night's sleep, I thought today was going to be even better than yesterday, but within a short while of the day starting I was feeling shivery, tense, butterflies in my stomach - really bad. I'm dreading my son coming home for christmas, I don't want him to see me like this; I think that's one of my biggest worries - that I wil embarrrass him or make him ashamed of me. I seem so scared of the future - I can't see it getting better.

Sandie

[999madmax]

Hey there Sandi,
I see you had a better sleep 6hrs instead of the norm 3-4hrs. Great, hopefully your sleeping pattern comes back better this time.
The only reason i slept quite well last night was because i went out drinking, came back watched the footie drinking and dropped off to sleep. Which was great, but i can`t drink every night - Too expensive and i`m not that much of a drinker!!
Hope your meds are helping - I saw the Dr on Thurs and all she gave me was a sick note for now!! Lets hope she gives me something better soon?!!


LOL

999Madmax
-*-

[Helenas2]

Hi Sandie
Sorry for late esponse - been out the loop for a week or two.
The bachs - i kinda squirt and do the drops too. I have too say i am trying to only use when really in bad need as i am too aware of my body becoming immune to them. I also find calms work - again in moderation. There was a time that if you shook my body it would rattle.
I hope you are finding the site helpful - i have ( still quite new). Its is good to know that there are others that can relate and know about your gut wrenching pain - and that can offer help.
Hope you are feeling stonger x xxx