Does anxiety EVER go away?

[xrachykinsx]

I've been dealing with anxiety since last October. I had a little breakdown due to life stresses and untreated post natal. My son is 3years old now. I was very reluctant to go onto antidepressants, I was very stubborn!! I started at the end of January finally.. and after 9 weeks needed my dose increased- I only started my increased dose on Saturday night so not expecting to be cured instantly...but sometimes I do wonder if this will all ever end!? I feel totally consumed by it all every day... It's almost asthough if I could have a tiny part of my memory erased...I wouldn't be anxious..my anxiety is only triggered by remembering all about it...my anxiety is constantly just about how I feel... when people ask what I'm anxious about, all I can say is 'I'm anxious that I'll never feel like me again'

[Phuzella]

Very good question. In my experience, the intense part of anxiety can and does go away. I think anxious personality types always have it in them to wobble, but it's how you deal with it that counts.
Dealing with past issues and feelings is tough and therapy can help. Personally I've slogged through it on my own, very tough but it worked for me.
Have a word with your doctor about some sort of talking therapy maybe:)

[phil6]

Hi xrach,
I think most of us are simply afraid of how we feel. Of course anxiety does change your thoughts aswell, so when you feel anxiety, you also think anxiously and you create a vicious cycle with thoughts and feeling reinforcing each other.
I can completely understand your wish to feel normal, as do I, but I am a firm believer that there is only one real route out of this nightmare. It's simple.... But it's not easy. Medication or no medication, the work has still to be done.
There are lots of books and therapies out there but there is no mystery to be solved with anxiety. Think of it like this... You think about anxiety with fear, this send a message to the part if your mind that handles fear and it instigates the fight or flight mode to protect you. These create all the feelings you get. Now it's fair enough that you don't like these and want them to go away, but if you struggle and fight against these feelings and fear the way you feel then guess what... Yep you increase the anxiety..it's a loop.
Like I say it's not easy, but you have to learn to react differently to the feelings and thoughts. You don't really have much control over them at the moment, so you have to learn to accept them and just feel it. Nothing is doing you harm and they will pass... Eventually. But your post tells me that you desperately want to make them go away, they frighten you. This is what maintains the anxiety. I don't know any other way that works.. Let it be, let go. Don't try and make it go away, stop struggling. It does mean that things will remain to be uncomfortable for a while but remember, these are just feelings. They don't mean anything is wrong, or that there is any danger.
Now I will say again...it's not easy. You have to be willing to face it all without withdrawing or being so fearful. I know it's not easy, because I manage this for an hour, followed by despair, then I get back on track, then I despair...but there are some good days now for me and then bad ones again (and these are just as severe) so it's so tricky to keep on going. It's just practice, practice and practice.
Learn some relaxation and meditation, but the main thing is willingness to feal anxiety without trying to cure yourself. Just let it be. good Luck

[MrAndy]

it fades over time but it takes hard work and patience,phil is spot on with his comments you need to let go and stop fighting it
good luck :)

[phil6]

Hi Andy,
How are you doing...?
Just to make my point, I went for a walk on Thursday, feeling not too bad... Then got thinking whilst walking and the anxiety kicked off. I quickly got into self pity and panicky mode and found myself rushing home. Why I want to get home is simply to be in a safe place so I can despair about it all. After 10 minutes of despair, I realise that I have been here a million times and it isn't getting me anywhere, apart from building more bad memories of failures. So I recover my composure, and remind myself about acceptance and patience and after a few hours my anxiety is receding.
The next 2 days are very good. I feel confident and calm.... Maybe that's it! Then this morning I wake and bang, a panic attack. Now if I am honest this doesn't happen on its own. I wake calm, check to see if I am anxious and the checking starts the anxiety. Then the thought of "it's back" does the trick. It's all very fast so it's not really something I should blame myself for, it's just habit and memory playing tricks. But I cannot deny its a real downer, and it's why I say acceptance is so difficult. It means you have to go through these blips over and over and over until eventually there is less reaction. Slowly the relationship with anxiety changes to less fearful ones. But this won't happen overnight. There are ups and downs and small improvements, but anxiety always feels severe when it comes. It would be nice if the symptoms were less severe as you slowly recover but that's just not the way it works. Anxiety can feel at it's most severe the day before you finally recover. That's hard to accept... I am accepting again now and trying to be willing to not get involved in attempting to change the way I am feeling. Practicing again.!
Phil

[xrachykinsx]

Thanks for your replies everyone. I am pretty strong, I'm much stronger than I was before I started on my meds and generally I am more accepting of it. I certainly don't just curl up when I feel a bit dodgey, I have a 3year old son to look after so it's just not possible. I force myself out and about- I actually find home the place where I panic more. Most of the time I push through the feelings of anxiety. I think having too much time on my hands doesn't help. I'm hoping to get back out there to work once my son starts nursery in a few weeks. I really think having a job will boost my self esteem and confidence..it's just bloody finding a job that's difficult! My mum thinks I'm becoming disheartened with my boring life situation which is feeding my anxiety. I know everything you have said is right and I am so very proud of myself for coming through this what seems a 'hell hole'. I guess I just wanted reassurance that it can go away if I help myself enough. :)

[MrAndy]

Hi Phil
I seem to have bounced back quite quickly over my latest blip,acceptance has helped.
Xrach you have the right attitude and will continue to feel better as you are taking positive steps,hope you feel better soon :)

[phil6]

Hi Xrach,
Sound like you are doing all the right things. Well done.
I am retired so having too much idle time is one of my fears also. I also push myself to get out there... Volunteering, gym, swim etc etc but there is still lots of time to think. It's not helpful, but it's not an option to be busy all the time. I think anxiety just fixes on anything and turns it into a problem so I am trying to ignore this as just another anxiety trick.
I was very stressed when I had a stressful job and could not wait for retirement... It all just goes to prove that it is all to do with faulty thinking. When I am feeling good, I enjoy my retirement.
Good luck and keep the faith.
Phil

[xrachykinsx]

Thanks Andy :) I'm glad you are feeling more positive. The thing that I find the most unsettling is the little adreneline rushes that I get... the ones that make you want to jump up and do something. I'm learning to just let it be and do nothing once they come...that' the most difficult bit with my anxiety as my symptom of panic is to jitter about and need to do something to cover it up. I can't relax- I'm going to buy a meditation cd as my doctor did tell me that doing it for 10-20 minutes a day will help xx

---------- Post added at 09:48 ---------- Previous post was at 09:46 ----------

Thanks Phil- I think you're right in that anxiety seems to morph into different ways. I started out as just being anxious about going to sleep at night, and once my sleep was sorted..it transferred into daytime anxiety and i'm still here with the day time anxiety xx