One step forward, three steps back...

[jab1982]

I have been doing so well the past couple of days. I have had a hard, swollen node on my neck behind my ear for about 4 weeks now. It has not gotten any larger but it has not gotten smaller either. I notoriously poke and prod and RUN to the doctor when I find a bump or lump on one side and not the other. I am trying to break the habit of running to the doctor and seeing him every six months for a check-up when I can voice my concerns. I am healthy, just had my physical and bloodwork two weeks ago. GP told me not to worry about it, it's pea sized. But I still am and I cannot help but think that it is something sinister.....commence poking and prodding. I am so tempted to run to the doctor. How do get through this? How do I not give in to this fear? I just want to live a healthy life and not be debilitated by my fear of the unknown.

[jjjh]

I know just what you mean because I do the same. I always think that the doctors are missing something major, or brushing me off because I have anxiety. I hate not being able to trust my gut! My only advice (because I'm still struggling too!) is not to isolate yourself. This is something I do, and I will google and obsess myself into a frenzy. I find if I force myself out and be social things get a little better. Good luck!