In pain

[mummyanxious]

Oh my goodness. I've spent an awful night tossing and turning again. Barely had any proper sleep. Soon as I try to move my chest and back are agony. Especially the left side of my chest. Feels like something pulling across it. I am wholly assuming this is muscular. I can't get in to see the chiropractor for two while weeks because if the blooming school holidays. Any tips?

---------- Post added at 07:04 ---------- Previous post was at 07:03 ----------

Why just the left of my chest??? And it burns when I breath? Can muscle pain burn?

[MyNameIsTerry]

I don't know about the rest MA, but muscle pain can burn yes, hence the fitness turn "feel the burn" as a result of putting the muscle under stress. That comes down to a build up of lactic acid in the muscle which is completely normal when putting it under stress. Is what you are having trouble with causing this in your muscles? I know you had a recent thread about this issue but I can't remember it bit just wanted to at least answer your question about muscle burning.

I hope you feel better later and get some peaceful rest.

[mummyanxious]

I've got issues with my breathing atm. Been checked over at the dr but they all say its nothing serious but can't tell me what it is.
I'm so frightened, about everything again. I'm sure these breathing issues now are indicative of cancer so reading through my body but my bloods are all normal, though they are regular blood tests and nothing specific.
It's time of the month atm so my anxious thoughts are quite high. They'll pass again but I just wish these pains would go. The breathing thing is really worrying me as its not classic of what I normally get with anxiety. It's triggered by certain positions.
And what if lactic acid is building up in my heart and going to make it stop. I don't even know if that's possible lol!

[ninnie]

Hi ma
If your tests are clear, l am sure this is just anxiety and you say its not the usual symptoms, but dont you find that as soon as you get used to one set of symptoms and ignore them your clever anxious brain will work this out and throw in a new symptom? Otherwise we would all get anxious once, get the all clear from the doc and stop worrying..........and that rarely happens.:mad:

---------- Post added at 08:36 ---------- Previous post was at 08:29 ----------

And im not an expert, but just completed my refresher 1st aid course yesterday and im pretty sure lactic acid was not a reason for someone having a heart attack:lac:
so please try to calm down if u can. If its sunny where u are, take the kids somewhere nice, buy them an ice cream.....for breakfast:yesyes: and sit yourself down, chill out , do some deep breathing and maybe youll kick mr anxietys butt, even if just for today.

[mummyanxious]

Thanks ninnie.
Nice idea but weather is dreadful here and I don't have the kids today as they're with their dad. At least that means I get some time to myself though I suppose and they don't bear the brunt of my pmt.
Epsom salt bath tonight for me.

[ninnie]

Time for some mummy time.......
choccy, ice cream, bath, nice music, candles, gls of wine.......
and absolutey no housework:lac:
xxx

---------- Post added at 08:59 ---------- Previous post was at 08:55 ----------

And as for epsom salts..........
think this calls for something a little more decadent. At very least some aroma therapy oils.....lavender, bergamot, geranium.......

[mummyanxious]

Oh yes going to be throwing some lavender in there with them :) You sound like you're very well acquainted with all the requisites of a good relaxation :)

[MyNameIsTerry]

Dont worry about lactic acid, it wont cause issues with your heart.

With it only happening in certain sleep positions, is it actually due to position or the mattress? I know I sometimes wake up feeling like my breathing is restricted. Exercise seems to get rid of this. I wonder if some form of stretching would help ease it, or something like pilates?

[mummyanxious]

Well I'm awake early and feeling frustrated. It was a good excuse for a good sleep last night because the kids are away but no, kept tossing and turning all night.
I had such a bad day yesterday. Again a good excuse for doing stuff to relax and just time to myself but I felt just plain odd and shaky all day. Did some digging in my garden and as soon as I started my heart rate shot up and I was panting. My chest was really tight and I had the odd breathing thing. I persevered hauling things about, cutting stuff, etc for about an hour and a half and then relaxed in front of the horse racing. Started feeling oddly jittery watching that and had an argument with a friend over something very stupid online. So that upset me.
Went to have a bath to relax and when I got out realised I couldn't see out if one of my eyes. So a migraine. I haven't had many of these in my life, they started when I was pregnant five years ago. Went away till a year ago when I had an isolated one. And now I've had two this month.
So that's got me worried as well a both times I've been exerting myself when I've had the migraine. They're only visual ones and last about half an hour. But I had such a stiff neck last night and this morning.
I'm just so very at a loss for what to do next. My mind is in a right mess again thinking I have cancer that's now spread to my lungs and now my brain. I had a chest X-ray last year though so I know that's unlikely.
I just feel so very tired all the time. My body tolerates no exercise without be feeling exhausted afterwards and my muscle mass is practically zero. I'm wasting away.

---------- Post added at 07:24 ---------- Previous post was at 07:23 ----------

Sorry for the long ramble! I just don't know what to try next

[ninnie]

Hi MA
Oh dear. Hoped you might have an ok day yesterday.
At least you got some fresh air and a bit of exercise. Cant offer you a proper diagnosis, but do you think your heart rate went up maybe because you were digging etc? Sometimes our anxiety can make us imagine something normal is something sinister. Just a thought. Or maybe you were overdoing it. If you are constantly worried etc. Thats pretty exhausting on its own.......
As for the migraine, I have had them off and on for years, sometimes, full on thumpers and sometimes just a few lights and no headache. I can remeber two distinctly as being triggered by having a stiff neck. Once after painting the ceiling and once after spending an hour and a half in a seat over to the far left front of a cinema. I always sit in the middle back now.
Hope this helps a bit.
What are we doing up at 8am on a Sunday morning?:shrug:

[mummyanxious]

I've been awake since six :( Guess my kids body clock doesn't switch off even when they're not here :(
I'm frightened of any form of physical strain on my body now be ause I'm worried there's something wrong with my heart and lungs. I've been tested. They say nothing's wrong.
But as soon as the adrenalin flows my body gets scared. I've tried facing and accepting the feelings and that doesn't work. I'm still waiting for my cbt/counselling app. They messed it up and so have had to rearrange. This is just the initial assessment too. I'm getting so frustrated.
The bath was lovely yesterday, very relaxing with the lavender. Just spilt rather by getting out to the migraine.
I suppose now I'm going to associate the migraine with the garden beings its happened after being there both times :(

[cloudbusting]

Hi mummyanxious and ninnie

I'm sorry that you had a tough time yesterday, MA :hugs:

Do you think yesterday that you might have overdone it a little as you were feeling tired already ? I'm not sure that I could manage an hour and a half of gardening in one hit, you did really well there.

The 'face and accept' thing isn't designed to make the feelings go away, it's more to stop it from escalating into a full blown panic, at least that's what I think it means, I am learning all of this myself at the moment too. CBT I think will help you so much once your appointment comes through.

Could you find something small to do in the garden that only takes a short time to complete, just so that you can nip that association in the bud (no pun intended !) with garden = migraine ?

I hope today is better for you.

Lisa x

[mummyanxious]

I always do a lot when I'm there. I have a very overgrown veg plot which needs a lot of hard work. I'm highly out if shape because of my fear of exercise.
I'm just concerned I'm cutting off oxygen to my brain or something and that's starting the migraines.
I'm just reading a book about hyperventilation I've seen mentioned by a few people on here. It really does hit home a lot for why my panics usually start etc.

I always thought from my previous cbt, because I have had it in the past (though it took so long to come through I was better by the time I started it so didn't really have anything to practise on), that you should sort of live through the awful feelings and in time they would deminish. For instance for me the school run is dreadful. I shake and tremble inside and my legs go to jelly as soon as I step out the car. I cannot avoid it so Ive continued to feel the feelings and talk to myself that they're normal fear feelings. But they haven't diminished one bit. It's very frustrating.

[ninnie]

I always do a lot when I'm there. I have a very overgrown veg plot which needs a lot of hard work. I'm highly out if shape because of my fear of exercise.
I'm just concerned I'm cutting off oxygen to my brain or something and that's starting the migraines.
I'm just reading a book about hyperventilation I've seen mentioned by a few people on here. It really does hit home a lot for why my panics usually start etc.

I always thought from my previous cbt, because I have had it in the past (though it took so long to come through I was better by the time I started it so didn't really have anything to practise on), that you should sort of live through the awful feelings and in time they would deminish. For instance for me the school run is dreadful. I shake and tremble inside and my legs go to jelly as soon as I step out the car. I cannot avoid it so Ive continued to feel the feelings and talk to myself that they're normal fear feelings. But they haven't diminished one bit. It's very frustrating.

hi both
Oh dear ma.......if you cut off the oxygen to your brain, yould faint at very least........and im guessing that not happening.
I used to get in a panic about going anwhere that was busy or crowded, like m&s.......my legs used to literally seize up like I was walking thru treacle. But once my meds kicked in and my anxiety subsided this stopped.
I dont know much about cbt as our docs have told me I will wait forever to see someone and I dont think I need it now in any case, but I guess once you have started a course things will start to improve.

---------- Post added at 09:40 ---------- Previous post was at 09:34 ----------

Ps. Isnt a book on hyperventilation a bit heavy going? Just a thought, but maybe try to take your mind off things with something soft and fluffy :shrug:

[mummyanxious]

I'm hoping for a breakthrough with something.
There are some interesting relaxation techniques in this book. I keep catching myself tensing up all the time. It's dreadful. It's a habit.
I really wanted to give the meds a go but I've tried two if the same type now and I just cannot bare the initial heightened anxiety. It's much worse that what I'm living in now which is bad enough. It's taken me about a month to get back to anything like what I was before just two of the tablets.
The dr suggested tricyclics but apparently they are linked to heart problems? So obv that's a no no in someone with a heart fear.
My brain actually believes at the moment I have a wasting disease. I have practically no muscle. And I can't see how that has come from just a couple months of inactivity. I'm getting tireder by the day :(

[hanshan]

I did a very quick web search and found that tricyclics are associated with a greater risk of heart disease, but not SSRIs.

Given that tricyclics are old-fashioned and rarely prescribed these days, I wonder why your doctor would want to prescribe them instead of an SSRI or other medication.

[mummyanxious]

Because I have a reaction to ssri ^^ heightened anxiety that I'm not willing to tolerate.

[ninnie]

There are more than one type of ssri. I didnt get on with fluoxitine, but am fine with sertraline.....although I think my problem with fluoxitine was just me panicking. :wacko:

[mummyanxious]

I have tried sertraline and citalopram. Surely they all do similar things though and the most common side effect is increase in anxiety.

[ninnie]

How long did you stay on them and did the doc offer you any diazepam or similar to calm you down a bit. I had diazepam for the first week or so, but havent been presribed any since as they can be addictive long term. Which doesnt surprise me one bit, as they made me feel fab....:cool:

[mummyanxious]

I took them for two days because on the second day I literally couldn't breath. I couldn't move from my seat. Every time I tried to exert myself my chest closed up. I was then prescribed diazapam to calm me back down which I took for a week or so but they didn't really help much. The mornings felt absolutely dire and I've been having trouble with my breathing ever since, though not as extreme as on the tablets.
I'm just at a loss. I don't know what to do about this breathing thing as I'm sure its something 'real' rather than psychosomatic.

[mummyanxious]

So I've been gardening again today. Ignored the chest pains and persevered. Well I could feel my heart racing the whole time and I was trying to control my breathing as best I could but when I stopped to rest my heart was still pumping hard at over 100bpm. Even now I'm back and resting its still high eighties. Id hate to imagine what my bp is doing. I'm buzzing all inside and feel shaky too.
This is why I don't like exercise :( Is all this normal??

[Catherine S]

Why do you constantly take your pulse, do you have your finger on it the whole day? You must know that it fluctuates loads by now? I take a beta blocker to slow mine down...not because its running too fast but to help with the missed beats, but I get problems because my heart can't go faster when I'm doing anything, and by that I mean just walking up the stairs. Hearts are meant to beat faster when you're doing stuff, that's their job...to keep the blood pumping around.

Your pulse doesn't sound too fast at all and you can bet your life you're adding to it by constantly monitoring it. Lack of exercise can make people less fit so yes, your heart can pump harder when you do some, but that's not a sign of heart disease, only that you're a little out of shape.

[Florance]

a pulse in the high 80's is not too much to worry about, especially if anxious, stressed etc. Blood pressure especially systolic (top line) and heart rate fluctuate a lot with anxiety

[mummyanxious]

I only took it because it felt uncomfortably fast aster the exertion ISB. It's still fast now. My normal resting rate is 60bpm.
I know I'm out of shape. Just hope all the pains are because of that and not angina.

[mummyanxious]

Still feeling odd and buzzy from that exertion yesterday :(

[cloudbusting]

Hi mummyanxious

How are you feeling today ?

You sound a lot like me, my HA centres around worries about my heart. I get palpitations that really bug me and the worry of having them has set off severe panic attacks. I also avoid exercise and exertion for exactly the same reasons as you do. I did start dieting at beginning of January and have lost 20lbs. Trouble is, when I see the figures go down on the scales I worry that I am losing too much ! I know deep down that that's a load of rubbish as I have done it safely and steadily (with another 20 to go) but, well, we are anxious people ! I also started walking at the same time and was doing great until the day I got too out of breath and had a panic at the side of the road :blush: I haven't managed a nice long walk since.

I take it you've had tests and stuff for your heart and breathing ? The physiological symptoms we experience are very scary and it is really hard to keep in mind that anxiety is exacerbating them.

What do you have planned for today ?

Lisa x

[mummyanxious]

I've had an ECG recently but I've had no breathing tests other than blowing into a peak flow meter.

I'm feeling really buzzy and odd today. My body just cannot tolerate exercise. Or I panic at the adrenalin?

I've lost a ton of weight since I was stressed. While I'm still in a healthy weight range for me I look gaunt and my legs have no muscle on them at all. They are all indebted where there once was muscle/fat.

It's very worrying.

[cloudbusting]

Hi again, I've been thinking of you :)

OK, can I ask how old you are ? I'm almost 46 and it's becoming clearer and clearer to me that a lot of the weird stuff going on in my body is linked to the perimenopause which you can start experiencing from your late 30s, apparently.

Today I started taking passiflora tincture that I got from the A Vogel website. It helps you to keep calm and also menopausal symptoms. I have been doing a lot of reading about hormones and the various stages of women's health throughout our lives. Also, I downloaded a great book for my Kindle called 'Revive !'. Look it up on Amazon and see what you think.

Have you had blood tests for thyroid function ? I had to ask for this but they came back clear anyway. Does your medical centre offer a health MOT ? I had one done at the end of last year, checked for things like heart, diabetes risk, liver function, cholesterol ... all came back clear again :blush:

One thing I am thinking of starting is yoga and/or Pilates. Nice, stretching exercises that will keep me 'well oiled' but won't make me out of breath and adding to the HA. Do you do anything like that, mummyanxious ?

Lisa x

[mummyanxious]

Hi again
I'm mid thirties. My hormones tbf have been all over the place since I had my second baby. But the dr never seems interested in testing hormones. I've mentioned it before.
I've got blood tests coming up for thyroid, glucose, fbc and u+e.
I will look up that on the kindle as I've got a kindle.
Managed to do day one of headspace last night which was good.
Had liver function checked lately and that was fine. Cholesterol is 4.7

[cloudbusting]

Ooh, yeah Headspace is good. I did the whole programme (the free version) a few weeks back but then became ill with chest infection and haven't got back into it since.

You know, I never realised how much fluctuating hormone levels can affect you until really recently. Low Progesterone seems to cause a lot of symptoms - heart palps etc and you're right, my experience of Drs is that they either don't want to or can't be bothered to test hormone levels :lac: Maybe that's a bit unfair as I've also read recently that the tests can be quite unreliable. I'm going to look and see if there is a test kit you can buy online or something similar ( you test saliva for hormone levels).

Good that you are having some other tests done, thyroid in particular.

Xxx

[mummyanxious]

Well if you do find one let me know!
I breastfed for an extended period and I know that puts you in a false menopause and I've been struggling since.
I know hormones have been responsible for a lot of my problems in the past. I never had migraines until last three weeks of pregnancy.

---------- Post added at 13:18 ---------- Previous post was at 13:17 ----------

I had my thyroid checked not that long ago mind you and it was fine then.

[cloudbusting]

I just had a wee look - wow, they are expensive, no wonder the NHS are reluctant to do them. OK, found a website for a US M.D called John R. Lee and he has a tick box test to see where you could be deficient in certain hormones. One of the questions struck a chord for both you and I - an intolerance of exercise. This can be down to cortisol deficiency caused by tired adrenals when you are under stress. That makes sense.

This book I told you about, 'Revive', includes a sensible healthy eating plan that I am going to take on board (might be difficult with reluctant other half but I shall try anyway).

I'm going to investigate this hormone imbalance thing a bit more ... will let you know if I uncover anything that might help.

[mummyanxious]

I must have tired adrenals. My adrenalin had been in overdrive for too long. What's the cure for this and is it serious or treatable?? Do I need some tests I can ask the dr for?
And so I go back to my worry about having Addison's disease :(

[cloudbusting]

Oh, crickey yeah, you can treat tired adrenal function very easily, usually with diet.

I'm not going to Google Addison's disease :lac:

See what the tests come out like that you're waiting for, mummyanxious and take it from there.

Lisa x

[mummyanxious]

Been out and bought myself some vit b, zinc, vit c and magnesium.

Any tips and diet etc send them my way!

[cloudbusting]

That's brilliant ! Will do :yesyes:

[mummyanxious]

Ok so I'm going to jump on the peaches bandwagon because this is what is worrying me and now I've read it I'm even more concerned for myself:

'Peaches is at high risk of electrolyte abnormalities which could lead to acute cardiac arrest.'

'Rapid dieting like this not only makes you lose muscle strength but wastes away your internal organs.'

I haven't been rapid dieting but I had a period where I couldn't eat properly because I was stressed and the weight just dropped off me. My muscles have wasted so I'm worried about my internal organs as well which obv includes my heart.

It's all very worrying.