bulan
10-04-14, 05:50
It began with a news story about someone very much like me, a young parent with a baby, battling melanoma.
That's all it took for me to become paranoid about all of my moles, and the fact that it hadn't occurred to me to be checked by a dermatologist... ever.
So at my first appointment last month, the dermatologist checked each mole causing me concern, and found nothing to worry about.
I still felt freaked, so I told her I wanted some moles removed.
Not long after, I saw the general surgeon. (My dermatologist doesn't remove larger moles.) But for a variety of reasons, I turned down the chance to have all of the moles removed that day. I took the next available appointment--one month away.
Which brings me to today. My appointment is still a couple weeks away, but one of my moles, on my upper chest, has become sensitive, and the area around it (not the skin, but underneath) feels sore or achy from time to time.
Now my son, who's 1.5 years old, is extremely active while nursing. He has recently (within the last week) picked at that mole. He also grabs a fist-full of my hair and tosses it around, bumping my chest in the process. Also, he's a gymnast anytime he's in my lap--pushing, pulling, climbing, rappelling, turning, flipping, what-have-you. He has punched and pushed around my chest ongoingly for several months.
Also, I have fibromyalgia. One of my symptoms is the popular "pain echo." In other words, if someone gives me a firm handshake, if I bump into something hard--or if my toddler head-butts me on the chest--that part of my body will feel pain for seconds or minutes after the 'impact'. And sometimes I have pain in these places for no reason at all.
So... my mole is sensitive. It hurts if irritated. And my chest immediately around the mole feels sore and achy.
Logic tells me I have my delightfully lively son to thank for it, and chances are that the mole on my chest is healthy and normal.
But health anxiety tells me I have rapidly-growing melanoma, that it's infiltrated the tissue in my chest, that it might already have taken up residence in nearby lymph nodes.
I still plan to get moles removed during my appointment in two weeks--as many as I can afford to have removed!
But I'm having a bit of a hard time staying on top of my anxiety while I wait. My worst fear is that--if I have melanoma--it would've been treatable if I'd asked the surgeon to remove my moles during our first appointment, and that it'll be too late when I have them removed at the end of April.
It sounds extreme, I know. But I'm needing reassurance, I think. If you've stuck with me this long, THANK YOU! :bighug1: Thank you for listening and sympathizing. I'd very much like to hear from you.
That's all it took for me to become paranoid about all of my moles, and the fact that it hadn't occurred to me to be checked by a dermatologist... ever.
So at my first appointment last month, the dermatologist checked each mole causing me concern, and found nothing to worry about.
I still felt freaked, so I told her I wanted some moles removed.
Not long after, I saw the general surgeon. (My dermatologist doesn't remove larger moles.) But for a variety of reasons, I turned down the chance to have all of the moles removed that day. I took the next available appointment--one month away.
Which brings me to today. My appointment is still a couple weeks away, but one of my moles, on my upper chest, has become sensitive, and the area around it (not the skin, but underneath) feels sore or achy from time to time.
Now my son, who's 1.5 years old, is extremely active while nursing. He has recently (within the last week) picked at that mole. He also grabs a fist-full of my hair and tosses it around, bumping my chest in the process. Also, he's a gymnast anytime he's in my lap--pushing, pulling, climbing, rappelling, turning, flipping, what-have-you. He has punched and pushed around my chest ongoingly for several months.
Also, I have fibromyalgia. One of my symptoms is the popular "pain echo." In other words, if someone gives me a firm handshake, if I bump into something hard--or if my toddler head-butts me on the chest--that part of my body will feel pain for seconds or minutes after the 'impact'. And sometimes I have pain in these places for no reason at all.
So... my mole is sensitive. It hurts if irritated. And my chest immediately around the mole feels sore and achy.
Logic tells me I have my delightfully lively son to thank for it, and chances are that the mole on my chest is healthy and normal.
But health anxiety tells me I have rapidly-growing melanoma, that it's infiltrated the tissue in my chest, that it might already have taken up residence in nearby lymph nodes.
I still plan to get moles removed during my appointment in two weeks--as many as I can afford to have removed!
But I'm having a bit of a hard time staying on top of my anxiety while I wait. My worst fear is that--if I have melanoma--it would've been treatable if I'd asked the surgeon to remove my moles during our first appointment, and that it'll be too late when I have them removed at the end of April.
It sounds extreme, I know. But I'm needing reassurance, I think. If you've stuck with me this long, THANK YOU! :bighug1: Thank you for listening and sympathizing. I'd very much like to hear from you.