halfwayhome
03-12-06, 07:33
So, I've figured out what exactly the problem is with my right arm & leg - it's that the muscles in both the arm & leg are very tense. At first it felt more like muscle twitches, but I realized that I was actually responsible for all the twitches myself.. because when they feel really tense, I twitch them.
I then googled (sigh.) "brain tumor, tense muscles" and actually didn't really find much so that made me a bit happier. Generally, it's apparently either a numbness, a paralyisis or a weakness. At first I thought it was a weakness, but I think it's more a tenseness.. which can CAUSE weakness, I suppose.
My boyfriend massaged my leg for me and it felt a bit better which speaks against brain tumor as well, I guess. If it was from the brain, a massage probably wouldn't make much of a difference. Plus, I think a tumor would cause muscles to go limp, not tense.
Stress is one of the leading causes for muscle tension. So, good news, right? Well, kind of. My concern is that the stress and tension is only on ONE side of my body. It is ONLY in my right leg and my right arm. That just sounds neurological to me.
And, I have the same problem as so many other people on this forum seem to have.. I had a doctor tell me this was just stress.. but I read someones blog on google saying "my doctor said it was just stress, but guess what?? IT WAS A BRAIN TUMOR!!!!" and it doesn't help. It terrifies me.
Last night was the worst panic attack.. probably I've ever had in my entire life. I fell to the floor because I was so pannicky I couldn't hold myself up. It lasted a good two hours. (Isially they pass in ten to fifteen minutes.. This one had breaks here and there, but really it just kept on going.)
With the exception of a few well meaning online friends, nobody is taking me particularily seriously. I hear "its noit a brain tumor" multiple times a day. I can admit to the fact that I don't HAVE the majority of brain tumor symptoms (no headaches minus the ones that come after a panic attack, no dizziness minus during a panic attack, no vomiting, no mental problems.) but I'm still 100% convinced that because the muscle tenseness is only on one side of the body, it must be a brain tumor.
I feel like I am preparing myself for death.
Will this ever end? :(
“Anyone can give up, it's the easiest thing in the world to do. But to hold it together when everyone else would understand if you fell apart, that's true strength.”
xoxox
I then googled (sigh.) "brain tumor, tense muscles" and actually didn't really find much so that made me a bit happier. Generally, it's apparently either a numbness, a paralyisis or a weakness. At first I thought it was a weakness, but I think it's more a tenseness.. which can CAUSE weakness, I suppose.
My boyfriend massaged my leg for me and it felt a bit better which speaks against brain tumor as well, I guess. If it was from the brain, a massage probably wouldn't make much of a difference. Plus, I think a tumor would cause muscles to go limp, not tense.
Stress is one of the leading causes for muscle tension. So, good news, right? Well, kind of. My concern is that the stress and tension is only on ONE side of my body. It is ONLY in my right leg and my right arm. That just sounds neurological to me.
And, I have the same problem as so many other people on this forum seem to have.. I had a doctor tell me this was just stress.. but I read someones blog on google saying "my doctor said it was just stress, but guess what?? IT WAS A BRAIN TUMOR!!!!" and it doesn't help. It terrifies me.
Last night was the worst panic attack.. probably I've ever had in my entire life. I fell to the floor because I was so pannicky I couldn't hold myself up. It lasted a good two hours. (Isially they pass in ten to fifteen minutes.. This one had breaks here and there, but really it just kept on going.)
With the exception of a few well meaning online friends, nobody is taking me particularily seriously. I hear "its noit a brain tumor" multiple times a day. I can admit to the fact that I don't HAVE the majority of brain tumor symptoms (no headaches minus the ones that come after a panic attack, no dizziness minus during a panic attack, no vomiting, no mental problems.) but I'm still 100% convinced that because the muscle tenseness is only on one side of the body, it must be a brain tumor.
I feel like I am preparing myself for death.
Will this ever end? :(
“Anyone can give up, it's the easiest thing in the world to do. But to hold it together when everyone else would understand if you fell apart, that's true strength.”
xoxox