I'm a breaking point

[Chloe34517]

I am breaking and I can't stop crying and I don't know what to do anymore. I'm dying and nobody will listen to me and I don't want to go. I'm away with a friend for the weekend until tomorrow, and I just don't know how to survive until then. I know I'm dying and the symptoms were here first, not the anxiety. I can see t so clearly in my head and it's making me cry. I don't want to leave my family or be without my parents or my brothers and sisters or even my cats, and the thought is destroying me to ya point where I honestly don't know how to carry on. In my head, I genuinely feel like I know I'm dying and that it will definitely happen in my sleep. That tonight or sometime in the next few days I'm going to go to sleep and slip away. I have so many symptoms all of the time and today I feel iller than ever. I know my heart isn't working properly and my pulse is so high which the doctors are monitoring, but I'm terrified. I have honestly never felt so scared and sad and helpless in my life. I'm only 19 and all I want to do is live. I know it's not just anxiety and ocd and nobody will believe me.

[Phuzella]

You need to see your doctor and explain exactly how you feel. Everything you've written in your post. Ring them on Monday for an appointment:)
I'm not saying that because i think you're dying, I think you need to speak to someone.

[Hellly]

I don't know if you are Scotland. We have this helpline called 'breathing space'. 0800 83 85 87 they have helped me before.

Please don't panic :-(

[Marie36]

Ok now lovely..breathe. You are panicing and it's a self fulfilling prophecy...you panic, you have real and scary physical symptoms and then you panic. It's terrifying and how you feel is very normal. Your pulse is being monitored by the docs..if they were worried they would not monitor, they would take you into hospital or give you treatment. Your heart is a very strong and effective muscle and built to withstand a whole stack of things including a fluctuating pulse. Look at athletes, people who work in high adrenaline situations or people like us...mine is up and down like a flipping yo yo!! I was just like you about my anxiety..the physical symptoms must have come first and I still don't really know. However I had so many tests I figured..they can't all be wrong! So I could rule out serious illness and believevthat the anxiety was causing these scary real symptoms. You need to talk..gp first I think..say exactly as you feel..they may run more tests but I suspect that how you feel at the moment these tests will not be enough..I could of had EVERY test but at one point it wouldn't have been enough. You then need to discuss the issues with anxiety and ask for support...there is plenty out there but you may have to wait. There are on line cbt and meditation that I found great..they may work for you. In the meantime talk to your family. My son is not much younger than you and I wpuld hate to think he was upset and hadn't told me. Use this site..the panic is creating the busy head but that's fine because we can help until you feel clearer again...I promise you will feel better soon x

[JaySDee]

I'm feeling much the same, but I'm 52. I have numerous things wrong, I'm sure docs n consultants think I'm hypochondriac but if they actually could find out what my probs were n sort them, instead, things now much worse and more adding to list. Feel like I'm banging my head against a brick wall.
I'm so fed up,

---------- Post added at 22:32 ---------- Previous post was at 22:30 ----------

I'm like you but docs can't determine what's wrong and more adding. To my list. I'm scared to death things getting worse cos they're not sorting any of my probs n it might then be too late

---------- Post added at 22:33 ---------- Previous post was at 22:32 ----------

My posts won't show

[inevitability]

Try breathing, i read somewhere that anxiety causes your lungs to over breathe which causes your heart rate to elevate cuz ur getting to much oxygen. Hold your breath for 10 seconds or so this resets your natural rythm and calms u down. Your very young and ur body is at peak performance, try just thinking rationally. Also what symptoms are you having that make u think ur dieng?

[Marie36]

I have sent you a private message in response to yours Chloe..I think! It doesn't seem to show and I am not very technical so thought I would put the jyst of it here and you can respond on this thread if yiu want to. You will be fine tonight..talk to family and friends..they want yiu too. None of us on here are experts..we are just sharing our experiences but the site has some great advice on the self help section invluding numbers in an emergency if you feel that hyou need it.Try to distract your head a bit..I play candy crush! Mindnumbing but it's a good distraction. Try to rest and tomorrow will hopefully be a brighter day x

---------- Post added at 00:30 ---------- Previous post was at 00:29 ----------

Sorry spelling is atrocious! Been a long day and now to bed..take care x

[Chloe34517]

Inevitability - I have so may symptoms all of the time. Pains in my chest that began before this huge anxiety flare up and are brought on mostly by moving, breathing deeply or laughing etc. Painful achey back. Extreme tiredness waves that aren't easy to fight and I struggle to keep my eyes open sometimes. Sudden aches down my arm that are so painful and make me feel so sick. Breathlessness at random times, when I've walked a tiny distance or climbed only a few stairs. Very fast heart rate that the doctors are monitoring, but sometimes it also suddenly dips low too. Spasms in the left hand side of my chest that vibrate. I cough at random times - it's not like a constant cough but it comes and lasts like an hour then goes again. I also get this weird feeling in my chest when I laugh or anything and I automatically have to group the left hand side of it because it spasms and hurts and feels really weird, painful and like something's going to fall out almost. When I breathe in deeply the breath is shaky and it's like I can't breathe deep enough because something stops it. Every time I brush my teeth, especially in the morning, I bring up loads of phlegm that's thick and sometimes it's a Greeny colour or has blood in it. Scared that this is all either my lungs, heart or something serious and deadly that will kill me in my sleep. Writing this I have a pain on the left hand side of my left breast, going to my armpit. I also sometimes get severe pins and needles in one arm that makes my fingers feel static and electric shock like and is unbearable. When I breathe my stomach goes out weird, like my lungs aren't working and breathing properly. Do you think it's anything serious? Really convinced that if it's my lungs or heart like I think it is that I'm going to die in my sleep and slip away.