misskitty
16-04-14, 09:34
Hi all. I have had anxiety my whole life but in two weeks time I have to move and it's got unbearable this last week. I was doing ok with the move but then one morning remembered the last time I moved and the panic I felt and it all came back. I have this fear that I will lose my memory and forget those around me. In those moments I feel unattached from the people I need most :( I am so scared that this will get worse when I actually move as I get very attached to 'home'.
It is worse because I dont want to move, I love my home but its really complicated. I live with my boyfriend in his mums old house - she lives elsewhere and rents this one out. Anyway after promising this house to us for as long as needed I started to really make it a home. Then her young granddaughter got pregnant and so she decided to kick us out and move her in.
In the last few weeks suddenly she is having new windows, fixing the boiler, professionally doing the garden, decorating - basically everything she didn't do for us :(
Also she promised to pay the deposit for the new place and when we told her it was £750 she laughed and said you can have £300.. so now my savings are almost gone.
Sorry I hope I haven't gone on to much but wanted to give an idea of whats happening. Anyway my anxiety is through the roof and i get very few moments where I am not scared :( Please tell me I am not going mad andi won't lose my memory :weep:
Just wanted to add - I asked her to come round last week when I was having a panic attack and she called me mentally unstable :( :(
It is worse because I dont want to move, I love my home but its really complicated. I live with my boyfriend in his mums old house - she lives elsewhere and rents this one out. Anyway after promising this house to us for as long as needed I started to really make it a home. Then her young granddaughter got pregnant and so she decided to kick us out and move her in.
In the last few weeks suddenly she is having new windows, fixing the boiler, professionally doing the garden, decorating - basically everything she didn't do for us :(
Also she promised to pay the deposit for the new place and when we told her it was £750 she laughed and said you can have £300.. so now my savings are almost gone.
Sorry I hope I haven't gone on to much but wanted to give an idea of whats happening. Anyway my anxiety is through the roof and i get very few moments where I am not scared :( Please tell me I am not going mad andi won't lose my memory :weep:
Just wanted to add - I asked her to come round last week when I was having a panic attack and she called me mentally unstable :( :(