We create problem's ?

[I'mdave27]

When I get over one 'problem' I tend to replace or I should say create it with another. Then when I've gotten over the second problem I sometimes go back to my first problem , it's madness. I know these are mind made problem's but at the time they seem very real , to me they do , so I kind of get stuck in these situations. One minute I think I'm addicted to porn then the next I have a problem with sugar and then I'll choose whatever I think I need to sort out in my life , if there is anything. Is this OCD ? Or am I that bored ? It's really annoying because just when I think I've got something over and done with BANG there's another problem , that I'm creating. I've tried meditation , cutting down on coffee , eating healthy but it seems to me that the thinker inside of me just won't shut up , ever ! It's not possible to be addicted to thinking is it ? Surely it can't be that would make no sense , there's no logic to it. Is it my way of reassuring myself that I have a place in this world ? I don't have friends , I've never liked or wanted peoples company , so I'm comfortable with it.

[MyNameIsTerry]

Dave,

From reading this and some of your other threads like the one about religion, I really do think you fit into OCD because Ruminations seem to explain a lot of how you are feeling.

Have a look at the Ruminations section and see if you can relate to it.

http://www.ocduk.org/types-ocd

It's interesting that Ruminations are indulged rather than resisted and this sounds a lot like you. Your thoughts don't seem to be upsetting you, you just get upset that that you can't turn them off and have some peace.

Does that make any sense?

I could see how your search for something of substance in religion and working your way through possible issues that you think you may have, could fit into this.

You come across as a deep thinker to me anyway.

[inCOGnito]

It's not possible to be addicted to thinking is it ?

yes. because you have the deep seated belief that thoughts are necessary for every part of your life - control, safety, carrying out actions, the general manager of life. I like how Eckhart Tolle puts it.... " it is not so much that you use your mind wrongly—you usually don't use it at all. It uses you."

thinking is certainly a habit fed by believing each thought. To use another quote, this time from Mooji, .."only a thought believed has any power".

Our belief in thoughts fuels more thoughts. our belief that we have to think our way out of problems only fuels more thoughts. Our reluctance to open up to negative experiences and emotions causes the thinker to believe that the solutions are to be found in thought. which only increases the number of thoughts. see how most thoughts revolve around trying to solve problems?!


Surely it can't be that would make no sense , there's no logic to it. .

no logic that you currently understand. what's helped me (and this is something i'm still working on) is the understanding that the body functions perfectly well all on its own without having to think about it. From little things like beating the heart or digesting food, to bigger things like driving the car and even conversing. Thought isn't necessary for most of these things. It's ok to let go of thinking your way through everything to letting the innate intelligence of your body take care of things all by themselves. thought just likes to think it's in charge of everything.

[phil6]

When you get a good spell, it can be interrupted by the sudden realisation that you are indeed not really listening to or noticing your thoughts.
I think you are thinking all the time, but in a relaxed state, your awareness of thinking is off. Like a radio playing in the background that you are not really listening to.
When anxious, we are engrossed in our thinking, not just aware, but entirely involved. It's almost like we become our thoughts. In this mode we start to believe that thoughts are fact and that it is necessary to follow them through to a solution. The problem is, thoughts are regularly not fact, and in the case of anxiety, there is no solution to find.
I find that when stuck in this rumination, trying to stop the rumination also becomes rumination. Whatever you try and resolve just adds to the thinking. It's no wonder it feels like madness, and is so difficult to stop.
Even though the following is still thinking, it helps just to think, "this is not helpful". It is a mindfullness skill to recognise what is happening and switch your focus to the body, usually to the breath. The thoughts continue, but with practice the awareness of them reduces.
I find that the thinking part often really objects to this and tries hard to pull your attention back. This is why I still need more practice as it is so easy to switch back and be drawn into full awareness and involvement of the thinking.
There are obviously times when we need to think through a problem, or plan. That is the greatest skill of being human. But in anxiety it is a hindrance. It simply does not work. The more we try and come up with a plan, a solution, the more we feel anxious. Why? I think because our thoughts about anxiety and our attempts to fix it are tinged with fear or frustration. And our amygdala reacts to these in the same way as any threat, with fight or flight. It causes anxiety.
Phil

[Oosh]

You're alone Dave.
Bullying in your past now you "never liked or wanted people's company".
Now you sit at home isolated and alone and wonder why your mind searches constantly.
Everyone needs people. It feeds you emotionally. Rewarding relationships activate the reward systems in your brain that release feel good chemicals literally like drugs. When people lose people it can feel like withdrawal.

The bullying and lack of positive relationships in your life are like the (big) unresolved issue in your life. But you never look to fix that area because of the negative effects bullying has had on your self esteem. You'll look at caffeine, religion, porn issues etc but not there ! So nothing changes. Instead your mind wanders amongst the more peripheral subjects like

caffeine- maybe that's what's wrong
Porn - maybe that's what's wrong
Thinking - maybe that's what's wrong.
Never looking at the real problem because it's too scary to tackle.
Your self esteem and self image are buggered so there's too much fear involved in taking steps to fix that particular area.

We all need positive relationships to make us feel good.
Alone your mind turns in on itself. People take us out of ourselves.

Picture you find a best mate. He looks like you, likes what you like, stands up for you, makes sure you're ok, can relate to you, makes you laugh, you two are inseparable. He would literally die for you.
Every day you wake up and think of your mate and feel good.
Then he's gone.
How empty is life now he's gone.
Well that's where you currently are. You're in a place starved of those positive things that rewarding relationships give you.

----------------------------->(Probably)<-----------------------------