Update after seeing the therapist

[idawmn]

I saw a therapist for the first time today and she said I had alot on my plate, no wonder I had anxiety (things that have happened in the past that I seemed to be able to handle at the time to some things that are going on right now).

I will be seeing her weekly for the next 4 weeks and also seeing a doctor from the clinic to see about some kind of med. I told her if it took a med to turn this 24/7 suffocation feeling, head in fog and chest tightness around I was for it but hopefully it will be just temporary.

While I in the waiting room a young girl came in with paperwork in hand like I had. I overheard her say, "I'm so tired, I didn't sleep all night." Yup, welcome to the club. I had a horrible night last night. I hadn't taken anything to help sleep thinking that since yesterday had been relatively decent (suffocation not so intense, no chest tightening) then I would be able to sleep reasonably well. Boy was I wrong.

I still don't understand this as I give myself pep talks, think positive, get out and do things, look forward to a new day, read happy books, watch happy things on tv. I keep thinking that miraculously one day this suffocation feeling will resolve itself. I guess I'm kidding myself. I think after 14 weeks I 'm too far gone and this requires bringing in the big guns now.

So I'm off to bed to see if I can at least get a nap. Thanks for letting me vent.

[SADnomore]

Let them roll in those big guns and blast the suffocating feelings to smithereens, hunni! (Of course, the kickback may put you on the couch for a few days, but, hey, you can use the rest, right? :winks:)
Great to hear you get 4 more sessions with the therapist, hope it continues to go well! Sometimes getting the thoughts out of your head and into the light of day with another human being, makes some of them shrivel up and leave, I have found ...
Marie xx

[idawmn]

Thanks Marie. I don't mind if drugs knock me out and make me sleep. I just don't want to go through days of feeling sick from them. I'm a wimp.

[SADnomore]

Oh, I hear you! I'm a wimp too, especially when I don't know whether it'll be really awful, or just "not fun"/strange. But one thing I never knew before coming on here was that side effects usually do pass, given time! Fortunately, a few good things happened one right behind the other ... 1, I was prescribed a med by my doctor without a word about side effects (he had listened to what gave me trouble in past though, and chose something new), 2, I threw away the leaflet with the outer bag and decided to look for positive reviews about it online, and 3, doing that led me directly to this site! Where I read aaaalll the way through the linked thread and learned which ones are to be expected, but not unbearable and not long-lived, and that someone else who had also been hoping to be helped with "my" drug, was! To the point that she is doing great, and that gave me what I needed to stick it out. No more side effects now for several weeks and I think it's helping! ... If there's anything you are considering, pretty much you will find out all about it online here, lol! :roflmao:

[idawmn]

I figure I have been through enough for the past 6 months with all of this. I just don't want more sickness.

When talking to the therapist about the meds and my fear of them she said not to be reading stuff online. More often then not you will hear more of the bad than the good. Everyone's body reacts in different ways to meds and I may not have any problems at all. LOL I got lectured about googling stuff about gallbladder surgery with my own doctor saying I will read more bad than good.

Anyhow I'll just wait and see how it goes when it comes to med time.

[SADnomore]

You bet. We don't need to be putting more worries into our heads, lol! I just meant that here, on this forum, the threads about our medications TEND to usually be pretty thoughtful and honest, as people discuss the meds they are on and how they've managed side effects, have asked for advice on how to support titrating up or down when the doctor changes dosage, and so forth. Stuff I really appreciate! :D

Good luck with your decisions :hugs:
Marie