PDA

View Full Version : Seeking some advice



stressaholic
09-05-14, 03:25
Hi all! I am a 24 year old female and I'm a textbook hypochondriac. I've been struggling with health anxiety for about four years and it's been nothing but an uphill battle. It seems to get better for a period of time and then I go right back to where I started - terrified and afraid to live my life. I'm here for advice - mainly advice on how to overcome/cope with health anxiety, hear if other people are experiencing the same feelings I am and to learn methods that may help me deal.

My worries all started when I was about 19. My right thigh suddenly went numb one day. I slept it off and the next day it was back to normal. About a month later it went numb again but this time it lasted. I went to see my family doctor who assured me it was probably just a pinched nerve, so I wrote it off as that and went on my way. Over the next week or so the numbness turned into tingling and then into pain. I got freaked out and went to the ER where the Physician's Assistant told me it could be any number of things - a pinched nerve, a pulled muscle, etc. - but the "diagnosis" that would send me over the edge was when she pointed out that because of my age it could be the onset of Multiple Sclerosis. :scared15:

I went to a neurologist who ordered an MRI on my back. The MRI discovered I had two bulged discs and slight arthritis which explained my numb thigh. However, in the course of my MS scare, I started to notice every little change in my body. I began to get these weird sensations where it felt like my scalp was on fire. I went back to the neurologist and demanded a brain MRI. The results of the MRI revealed nothing associated with MS, but they found a tiny cyst on my pineal gland which I automatically diagnosed as cancer.

Long story short, for the next year or so I struggled greatly with my anxiety. Every little ache and pain sent me into a vicious cycle of worrying and I went to doctors repeatedly insisting that I was dying. Some days I didn't want to get out of bed because I was afraid I would just find a new symptom and a new disease. I started seeing a therapist regularly and my doctor prescribed me 10 mg of Celexa. After that things started to improve until recently.

I am going through a very stressful time in my life right now with issues completely unrelated to my health, so logically I am trying to tell myself my "symptoms" are just physical manifestations of my anxiety but it's never that easy.

I stopped my Celexa a few weeks ago as I thought I was doing better and I've decided I really don't want to rely on medication. Before I stopped and now I am experiencing a cocktail of symptoms. I always feel tired even if I sleep a full 8 hours. When I start to feel panicky, I will experience dizziness, lightheaded feelings, an increased heart rate, feeling like my heart is skipping a beat, become very warm all of a sudden (hot flash), and shortness of breath. Recently I have been experiencing random muscle jerks and spams, feeling clumsy and like I don't have control on my limbs, spaced out, and like my limbs are a dead weight or numb.

The most alarming symptom I have been experiencing is what I like to call the Rush. It has been happening on and off for maybe about a year now. It usually occurs when I am anxious and thinking about something and then the more I think about the Rush, the more it happens. It's difficult to describe but I can either be sitting around or walking and all of a sudden it feels like someone rebooted my brain. I will kind of have a full body spasm for a second, and this odd feeling rushes through my whole body. I have to catch my breath and I'll often become hot. I have described it to my doctor who wrote it off as anxiety but I am not sure. I cannot find anything like this on any anxiety book I have read, but it could be a symptom that is unique to me. Who knows?

Because of these new symptoms I have reverted back to thinking that I have MS. Google is my worst nightmare. I am convinced I have all the symptoms with the muscle jerking, spasms, brain fog, etc. and especially the Rush. I just had an MRI of my brain (with contrast) to check on my cyst and everything came back normal. Despite this and the obvious lack of lesions on my brain MRI, I am still convinced and worry about it often.

My questions are these: Has anyone experienced any of the symptoms I have been experiencing? It would be nice to know I'm not the only one. Other than medication, can someone recommend ways to overcome or cope with the anxiety that have worked for them? Also, as I'm sure many of you know health anxiety can be debilitating and interferes with daily life if it gets out of hand. How do you break the vicious cycle of thinking every single pain is a death sentence?

Any advice or comments are appreciated. Thanks for reading my posts. Feel free to ask any questions!

Worried 24/7
09-05-14, 03:57
I have had all your symptoms at one point or another. Even the rush sounds similar to experiences I've had. The only advice I can give is to definitely stay off Google. Google has completely ruined my life. If I could go back in time I'd go back and tell myself to never Google any symptoms EVER.

HoneyLove
09-05-14, 10:31
Welcome to the board stressaholic :) I'm sorry you went through such a difficult time with health anxiety so early on in your life, but you've come to the right place for help.

If you have a look at this article you'll find that pretty much all your symptoms can be connected to anxiety:

http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/articles/symptoms/

They are usually the result of the hormones that your brain releases when you're feeling stressed and anxious. The Rush that you speak of sounds very like an adrenaline rush, I've had that same feeling myself when my anxiety was bad, I would start to worry about something and suddenly feel this warm blast surge through my body and my heart would start pounding. I still get it sometimes if I'm nervous, but I know what it is now so I don't allow the anxiety to go further and usually do a breathing exercise to calm my body & brain down again.

It's normal to feel some side effects when coming off a medication for anxiety or depression, it may take you a little while to find your balance again. It is possible to use different methods to help you deal with the anxiety without medication, if you'd like to learn a bit about it just say the word and I'll pop a post up here for you :)

Tanner40
09-05-14, 12:09
Good Morning Stessaholic. Welcome to NMP. You've certainly come to the right place. You will find many people here that understand exactly what you're going through. There will be lots of good advice and understanding.

I can honestly say that I have had all of the same symptoms at one point or another, and they have all been anxiety related. Googling symptoms is never a good idea for me, as it just fuels the fire and makes my anxiety worse.

I started out by reading posts on here and finding people who seemed to have a good level of recovery and listening to their experience. I wanted to know what they did to slay the dragon, anxiety.

CBT helped me tremendously, and there is a free online course that I use that is wonderful. CBT helped me to pick out the irrational thoughts that I was having and replace them with sane, rational thinking. That immediately takes my anxiety level down several notches.

If I may ask, what things have you been trying in order to cope with your anxiety?

SarahH
09-05-14, 12:55
Welcome,

As everyone above has said this could be anxiety coming back BUT it could also be withdrawal from the Celexa. Look up "SSRI withdrawal" it may help explain your symptoms.

Sarah

Serenity1990
09-05-14, 14:57
Hello! You've certainly come to the right place. Nobody on here can tell you what you have and haven't got (if only!) but they can empathise with what sounds like a very typical case of health anxiety. :)

The key thing with MS is that the list of symptoms is pretty much irrelevant, it's their presentation that counts. As you've probably gathered by now, MS can affect pretty much any neurological function, and given that all of out bodily functions are somehow controlled by nerves (albeit indirectly in the case of endocrine functions) MS can cause pretty much any symptom imaginable. As a result stick anything you like into google and WebMD will list MS as one of the possible causes. Thus with a particular list of symptoms you stick them all into google together and you've got a pattern that simply isn't there.

How do doctors differentiate between someone with a sore knee, numbness or whatever else caused by common and benign causes and MS in that case? It's the symptom presentation that makes all the difference. I won't go into detail about that presentation as I know from experience that once you know it your mind will play tricks to make the symptoms present in that way. You must understand that you could have ten very typical symptoms of MS but if they don't present in the right way it's impossible to be caused by MS because of how the disease works. Your doctor knows this, I suspect his assistant didn't.

Have a look at the posts on here by RLR (a retired neurologist who sadly hasn't posted for over a year), and itoldyouiwasill. These two people have really helped me out of my little personal hell.

stressaholic
09-05-14, 17:54
Thank you all for the wonderful replies!

Honeylove, any posts about methods to cope would be fantastic!

Tanner40, I have tried therapy, exercise, breathing techniques and that's about it. When I get a really bad panic attack or episode sometimes if I say my name outloud and talk to myself about how all I am experiencing is anxiety, it will help me out. If you could post the link to that free course I'd really appreciate it.

---------- Post added at 12:54 ---------- Previous post was at 12:53 ----------

Serenity, thank you for the advice. I will have to look into those users.

Tanner40
10-05-14, 14:11
MoodGym is the site that I have used. I think it's Australian. Google it and it should come right up. It's helped me a lot. Let me know how it goes.