Bear&bug
11-05-14, 19:20
Hi everyone, I'm new here. :)
My health anxiety is only a few months old but I've suffered anxiety & depression all my life on and off. This newfangled HA is new to me & EXHAUSTING. I have a 2 year old & am pregnant with my second, I've never felt more drained in my life!
What frustrates me is I like to think of myself as a reasonably intelligent person. But in the last 3 months I've been absolutely convinced I have 3 different types of cancer. I obsessively check for lumps & consult Dr Google. I know how unhealthy my behaviour is & how deluded I am, yet every time I get over a particular fear, a new one comes along & fools me! You'd think I'd have learned from experience, but every time I think "this is it, there really is something wrong this time." :lac:
My partner is unnerved by just how obsessed & unreachable I am. He just can't understand how my perspective can be so different from reality. I know I'd be the same if I were him.
Off to the GP Tuesday to try & alleviate my leukemia fears (I won 't bore you with the symptoms I think I have...sigh) & after that I 'm going to throw myself into beating this HA. I've got CBT booked for July, in the meantime I have to do it alone. Fingers crossed I'll manage. I've barely been able to emotionally connect with this baby inside me due to all the anxiety & I've become a more emotionally distant mum to my little girl.
My health anxiety is only a few months old but I've suffered anxiety & depression all my life on and off. This newfangled HA is new to me & EXHAUSTING. I have a 2 year old & am pregnant with my second, I've never felt more drained in my life!
What frustrates me is I like to think of myself as a reasonably intelligent person. But in the last 3 months I've been absolutely convinced I have 3 different types of cancer. I obsessively check for lumps & consult Dr Google. I know how unhealthy my behaviour is & how deluded I am, yet every time I get over a particular fear, a new one comes along & fools me! You'd think I'd have learned from experience, but every time I think "this is it, there really is something wrong this time." :lac:
My partner is unnerved by just how obsessed & unreachable I am. He just can't understand how my perspective can be so different from reality. I know I'd be the same if I were him.
Off to the GP Tuesday to try & alleviate my leukemia fears (I won 't bore you with the symptoms I think I have...sigh) & after that I 'm going to throw myself into beating this HA. I've got CBT booked for July, in the meantime I have to do it alone. Fingers crossed I'll manage. I've barely been able to emotionally connect with this baby inside me due to all the anxiety & I've become a more emotionally distant mum to my little girl.