Why do you think you developed a Health Anxiety?

[Trueman]

Okay, I know I have a health anxiety. It's pretty obvious to be honest. But why? Looking back there are probably a load of reasons. My mum was anxious but strangely I used to think she was calm. But I remember now, lots of things she used to say that perhaps made me worry about death, illnesses and she was a nurse/midwife. A great nurse and midwife.

I always had an anxiety problem but not health. I developed the general anxiety after flying once, then driving motorways. Had this out of body type experience - not in control and then that it was it..

But then things progressed. Panic attacks in public places. So much that I couldn't leave the house without someone else. And I was a pretty confident person. I had my life together! I couldn't rationalise it at all.

Then I met my fiancee. Moved away from home. And within a year of doing this my mum died unexpectedly of what was either enchephalitis/meningitis while i discovered i was pregnant with my first born. Quite young at 57. This destroyed me. Still does.

Then I fell pregnant again. Then my fiance was diagnosed with an incurable lymphoma. Went through 2 sessions of chemo and a bone marrow transplant.

In all this time we experienced several misdiagnosis with my mum and my fiancee. And then my dad died of a stroke, 5 yrs after my mum.

I don't mean this to be a sob story at all. But looking back, anxiety was already triggered. By trips in cars for days (travelling) - with my mum shouting out 'watch out for that car' or by seeing my mum switch off every electricity switch at night just incase… My mum was lovely. It's not her fault and she experienced loads of traumatic things as she grew up. Maybe history just repeats itself? Maybe it doesn't and we can take control.

I'm trying to understand it. I am trying to make progress.

[skippy66]

I think it's a combination of nature & nurture, but in either case it can be completely overcome with the right tools.

[Trueman]

If I could like this I would. Thanks skippy66 :)

[UKmamainUS]

All my anxiety began after having kids. I think the tremendous responsibility of children plus the fact they are so dependent on me and I live them so much and want to watch them grow up more than I've ever wanted anything, is what triggered my anxiety. I think I have had depression for most of my life and so I guess I was already susceptible.

[luc]

Same here UKmam and like you I have always been susceptible. I used to always worry about my mam leaving me and now I worry about me leaving my kids - and I still worry about my mam:doh:..
I think it's nature and nurture as as far pack as I can remember I had rituals to keep everything in check - in my case to keep my family alive i.e. mantras, order etc. Was this OCD at the age of four? I always remember about ten years ago going to a conference in London about health anxiety and there were young kids there with HA. I will never forget their stories and how exhausted they were at such a young age:weep:

[Izzytheanxietyqueen]

Well for me I got health anxiety after my dad suddenly died back in May last year and after I came out of the shock period at around August time I get very anxious about my health really nervous! I think it was seeing my dad collapse and die so suddenly when we all thought he was healthy was why I got it.

[Hellly]

It was two things for me.........

1. My mum dying of pancreatic cancer :-(

2. I have quite an obsessive nature. So after 10 year of battling numerous eating disorders, I finally beat it only to find something new to obsess over...... My health!! The weirdest thing is, a couple of years ago I couldn't give a crap about my body and what I was doing into it, as long as I was thin everything was good. I guess I am paying for it now :-(

H

Xx

[Trueman]

Thanks for sharing everyone. It does seem that this HA develops over a long period of time and is born out of personal experiences and loss.
Recognising this - is this a way out? Is HA a form of obsessive compulsive disorder then? It's not as obvious as washing your hands constantly etc. constant obsessions with illnesses triggered by what probably are irrational fears?
I can see now how I have learned some of these behaviours and then built on them with thoughts/behaviours - constantly on 'alert' for health problems..

[Serenity1990]

Thinking back I've had anxiety for a really long time, which had probably stated toanifest physically over years as I was a very career driven person in a high-stress occupation working way too much. It's only when I took a little time off this HA stared and I physically couldn't return to work. So maybe it's my body's way of sending me a strong message.

[SUPERXERO]

I fall on my head that when I Started getting it

[luc]

I truly believe that HA is a form of OCD after much thought. I suppose it is academic but I would love to know the views of others.

[worryworryworry]

All my anxiety began after having kids. I think the tremendous responsibility of children plus the fact they are so dependent on me and I live them so much and want to watch them grow up more than I've ever wanted anything, is what triggered my anxiety. I think I have had depression for most of my life and so I guess I was already susceptible.

I would say mine was the same - the kids! x

[unsure_about_this]

it properly started with my Dad went for an important bowel poop screening test, because he reached the age for testing for bowel cancer in late 2011/early 2012. in mid 2011 our local paper did a piece of male cancer (testicular/penile/prostate cancer telling us to visit the GP if we are worried, find something/or think we have felt something which does not feel right)
2010 my legs hurt when walking home from football, thought this could be bone cancer.

it has been nearly three years where I have had a lot of tests/scans and the things I have thought I had was not found, but at least I know I have been checked

[Trueman]

Yes luc, the more I think about it the more I think HA is an obsessive compulsive disorder. Don't want to start googling it though… !

[Freaked]

For me it was after I came down with a condition called postural orthostatic tachycardia syndrome. It's scary sometimes and very life-limiting, and commonly triggers anxiety and panic due to high adrenaline levels. It's very difficult for me to cope, and my faith in doctors and their diagnoses has been eroded (it already wasn't great due to family stuff). So now due to a few factors and some scary episodes, I worry I have a more serious undiagnosed heart or other condition. For me it's all pretty straightforward, but difficult to get over.

And luc, I'm actually in psychology ironically, and while OCD and HA do have similarities, there are some important differences. OCD is usually even more irrational.

[luc]

For years I have thought this with all my obsessive behaviours, ruminations, coping mechanisms, avoidance techniques ( see earlier posts). professionals ask what I most fear. Truth is that is no longer foremost in my mind. What I most get fustrated, exhausted and peed off with is the remembering details i.e. what the doctor said in 2004; checking; ruminating and having to exhaust certain thoughts (can't remember correct word for this). Sometimes I stop worrying, simply because I am exhausted with it! Like I say the label is academic but maybe subsequent treatment/medication differs if recognised as OCD .

---------- Post added at 20:13 ---------- Previous post was at 19:57 ----------

checking a bra or a sheet for blood over and over again in different lights is akin to locking, doors, washing hands etc. Order and control is what I am seeking - Why I do not know and I do not know why I do not trust my own mind!!!!

[GingerFish]

Well my mum and gran both suffer from panic disorder, as do I now and when I was growing up I would see them always being so highly string and worried over everything, especially their health so I must have picked up on that. My papa also pretty much has every illness under the sun it seems like and a lot of them, I'm likely to get through time as some can run in families so that makes me worry whenever I get the slightest symptom.

[Cusper]

Mine too Ginger. Both my mom and my grandmother are incessant worriers. My grandmother was the most unhealthy person I know when I was a kid... Smoking 3 packs a day never eating a fruit if her life depended on it... just pure meat and potatoes...then growing up my mom basically told my brother and I about every disease that existed and the possibilities of us getting any number of them if we didn't do what we were told. Now I have HA and my brother has severe OCD. I think part of it is genetic because both of my parents have it and then from all of the fear education from my mother and not to mention the news is nurture. It's brutal and now I have a young son who I worry about on top of it. I am determined to overcome this. I do not want to perpetuate this onto him. Luckily my husband is the calmest man on the planet and has absolutely no health worries what so ever and he fell 100 feet off a cliff years ago and survived. Someone on here suggested a book called Conscious Medicine that I am just reading. It's pretty good.

---------- Post added at 20:11 ---------- Previous post was at 20:09 ----------

Coincidentally both my mother and my grandmother (who is now 93) are still alive and the one thing they regret about their youth was all the worrying. AND coincidentally they still do.

[Alonso100]

I believe i devloped it due to a combination of my mother being diagnosed with breast cancer, the stresses of final year studies and the large/swollen lymph gland in my neck. I was convinced i had cancer and then began to devlop strange symptoms but realised i was becoming anxious. I then began to feel a sensation in my head and for weeks on end i thought i was about to have a stroke or a brain tumour, this is when i had my first panic attack but i'm glad it was with my girlfriend as she is my rock, this didn't help my HA because i began to worry about dying and never seeing her again, this really scared me. I took a panic attack in uni but thought i was having a heart attack back in february and had to be rushed to hospital but the ECG was fine and have had a 24 ambulatory ECG recently and nothing has been reported. My
HA has recently reduced but i still find myself feelin my pulse/heart rate which i wish i would stop cause if i take a palpitation i can feel the adrenaline starting and have to try to forget about it cause i don't want anymore panic attacks. I just wish i could go back to the way i was before all this without a care in the world.