Feeling really ugly :((((((((((((((((((((((

[melishaxoxo]

So recently my cousins and aunt came over to my house. Please note that i have gained 8kilograms over the past year, started losing my hair so my hair looks horrible most of the time :( Been through so much of stress and my left eye has been giving me the biggest problem but nobody knows why mri scans came out clear also had blood tests done all was fine except for cholestrol, eye opthamologists cant find the reason why my left eye is bulging and eyelid drooping so looks like im stuck with this. SO my aunt and cousin came over and my aunt teased me about my face looks like i need makeup and then anyways they wanted to take family photos and so i did, my cousin then tagged me in them on facebook, lucky i review it before its posted onto my timeline for the world to see. Because in each one of them i look so ugly, i look fat, eye looks bulgy and dark circles under my eyes, my hair looks like a freaking state and i look like i suffered a stroke :((( i never looked this bad in my life and im so tired of spending money on doctors and getting no answers. I do admit i spend hours on the laptop or phone because i have no social life and nobody to talk to :(( i need a makeover but nothing can hide my ugly left eye :(((( i dont know what to do anymore, everyone is looking so full of health and vitality even though they smoke,drink and eat junk and here i am suffering and i dont know why.

[Rennie1989]

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Everybody is beautiful, no matter if you have a bulging eye, a third leg, two faces or whatever.

I have conflicting features (blue eyes with dark hair) and I often find it very difficult to find colours, makeup and clothes that compliment me. Before my wedding last year I was worrying how I was going to do my makeup because every colour was not working. I asked a lady at a cosmetic shop what suited me and she should me a pallet of colours. I have stuck to them ever since and simply changing the colour of eye shadow, lipstick and foundation makes such a difference that you feel better in yourself. So one of my advice is to do just that.

Clothes is a funny one too. Horizontal stripes no longer make people look bigger and certain patterns go well with others. I believe in moderation, for example show chest but hide legs, show legs but hide chest. Google your body shape (and be honest, don't be cruel to yourself) and you should be able to find tips on what shapes, designs and colours would work on you. It does make a difference wearing clothes that you can see works wonders on yourself.

I want to just say that you do not need to change the way you look so others think of you differently. If you want to change your look then do it for yourself, because you are the only one who matters :)

[Catherine S]

Melisha, are you taking any medications that you might be suffering side effects from? Some meds can cause symptoms in sensitive people. I have gained weight since taking propranolol which is an adrenalin blocker that slows the system down. I also take thyroxine for an under-active thyroid, symptoms of which are weight gain and thinning hair amongst others. I know you are young but have they checked your thyroid levels? Also, low iron can cause hair loss too. Hormones can be cruel to us women over the years, they have alot to answer to.

But as Rennie said, a beautiful person is inside not outside. Hard to grasp it when you are young though I know.

ISB x

[melishaxoxo]

I have gotten my iron and thyroid check unbelievably they are normal and no concern for. Even makeup doesnt make me feel good, i always end up looking like i have a fake eye :/ i dont know, i want to lose weight too i am going to start with that first i think to boost self confidence. I had a very difficult time in my life the past few years and i have not been on any medications been too scared to take any. I however did try to overdose myself at 18 years old but that was so long ago :/

[swgrl09]

I think getting some exercise and changing your eating might help a lot. Since I've been working out more, small changes have happened and my self-esteem is a little better.

Have you been to a therapist? It's so hard when you feel like you are hideous - even though I am sure you are not. I heard somebody say that if we treated our friends the way we treat ourselves, we'd have no friends left. Treat yourself the way you would treat a friend. Try not to beat yourself up so much or be so hard on yourself. Maybe some positive affirmations could help.

I know what it's like to feel that way. When I was younger, I used to get styes in my eyes a lot but the thing was mine wouldn't go away like regular people. They would harden into cysts and I'd try medication, warm wash cloths, etc but they wouldn't budge. I would have to get them surgically drained to be back to normal. Once I had one drained another would crop up. It was endless for a couple years.

But during those times where I had one eye looking soooo bad (I'd call myself Quasimoto), I felt so bad about myself and was so embarrassed to go to school or be around people. I tried makeup but didn't know how to apply it the right way so it just made things worse.

The thing is, now that I am an adult, I look back at pictures of myself from those times and it is not NEARLY as bad as I thought I looked while I had the styes. In some pictures, I can hardly tell it's there. We are so much harder on ourselves than anybody else is.

You will get through this hard time and look back and see a beautiful person that everybody else sees. If you do decide you want to change your look or go get a makeover, maybe try talking to a professional makeup artist. Then you will get really good tips instead of just trying it out on your own. They know how to shade areas of the face that bulge and highlight other areas to change your whole look. But do it for yourself, not for other people.