Is this my anxiety?

[Butterfly22]

Even though I know something is fine I keep thinking it's not, for example, I met someone really nice and then they had a few problems where they couldn't speak to me much and I started to think they were going funny on me but it seems they weren't, but even though I know everything is fine, even they have said so, I keep thinking something is wrong and instead of feeling happy with them I keep thinking negative which takes the original fun out of meeting them, any advice?

[Oosh]

It sounds like insecurity.

Look at two different mindsets -

Person 1 feels good about themselves. They know they're a catch. They know everyone likes them and that they are lots of great things. The world is full of people who they can probably take their pick from.
They meet someone, it's great. But they go a bit funny and can't talk to them.
They think "going a bit quiet on me here, I don't know why so I'll be a bit understanding. But if it continues it's going to bore/annoy me. I know there is nothing wrong with ME. I know this is not my fault. So I'll find someone who makes me happier and gives me the attention I want"

Person 2 doesn't feel as good about themselves. They are insecure about aspects of themselves. They feel they can't pick and choose. They meet someone, it's great. But they start going quiet and can't talk to them. They think " they're going quiet on me here. What could be the reason ?"
(First place they look is what's wrong with them)
"Maybe I'm boring. Maybe they're getting bored of me. Maybe they don't fancy me because I suppose it's true I'm not as attractive as this and that person. I don't want to be rejected and hurt. It's taken me ages to get someone to like me. I'll have to try extra hard. What if they are losing interest. I need their reassurance. I'll text and ask if they still like me. No reply. Maybe I should go and knock at their house etc "

Person 1 is secure in who they are and looks at the other person if something's wrong.

Person 2 is insecure and looks at themselves for what's wrong if something wrong.

Even if you don't feel as secure as person 1, be it, adopt the mindset.
Why ? Because you have value.

If they're quiet, give them time, understanding etc but dont look at what's wrong with you. There's nothing wrong with you. Remind yourself of that. Remind yourself of all the reasons you're great.

Everyone can feel insecure. I've had it really really bad. And I've also felt really secure.

Work on any specific insecurities you have. Do you feel weak in any areas ?

If after you've been patient they dont come around then move on. They fall below the standards you've set yourself. Have your standards. Everyone deserves to be treated well. We're all very valuable.

If theyve said theyre fine, they might be shy. Maybe theyve frozen up because they think you're so ace. (Bet you you didn't think of that did you) Be talkative and try and draw them out of their shell. If it is shyness and you can draw them out and get them to be themselves and you then see they're really nice and they really like you and appreciate the time you've taken to make them feel comfortable, it'll all be even more worthwhile won't it.

[Butterfly22]

Thank you for your great response, I think I would fit into mindset of person 2, the insecure one, I can relate to the bit about needing reassurance that they still like me, if they've lost interest am I boring etc, so have to try and move into mindset 1 somehow, not going to be easy but I need to try.