Fear of everything!

[AnxiousPansa]

Hi everyone
I am going through an awful patch of anxiety at the moment. I am fearing everything. I wake up in the morning and my whole day consists of anxiety and questioning everything what is life? what is consciousness? what happens when I die? what if I get some horrible disease? what is the meaning of life? what if my anxiety drives me mad? constantly all day. My head also feels whoozy and I can't concentrate and stuff feels like a dream. Then at night I lay down to go to sleep and my mind races with all sorts of awful things I conjour up horror movie images and stuff that scares me almost like I am trying to scare myself and I am terrified I will go mad from these horrible images and thoughts. I don't know what to do with myself at the moment. Any advice appreciated. (I do not take medication and my doctor doesn't want me to and neither do I) x

[UntilTheDawn]

Hi there, I am quite new to this forum but have suffered anxiety for a long time and know a thing about it or two by now! Night time is always the worst for it and not getting good sleep makes the next day harder so that's the key... Tired makes it worse... My best advice is to try and make things smaller. Take tonight, you only have one thing you need to do and that is to try and sleep - it is the best medicine. One thing I found really good for this was just searching youtube for some 'sleep guided meditation' type things and more than once have gone from really overwhelmed...to being fast asleep....Nothing to lose and a good nights sleep to be gained! Don't try to deal with tomorrow tonight x

[inCOGnito]

Hi everyone
I am going through an awful patch of anxiety at the moment. I am fearing everything. I wake up in the morning and my whole day consists of anxiety and questioning everything what is life? what is consciousness? what happens when I die? what if I get some horrible disease? what is the meaning of life? what if my anxiety drives me mad? constantly all day. My head also feels whoozy and I can't concentrate and stuff feels like a dream. Then at night I lay down to go to sleep and my mind races with all sorts of awful things I conjour up horror movie images and stuff that scares me almost like I am trying to scare myself and I am terrified I will go mad from these horrible images and thoughts. I don't know what to do with myself at the moment. Any advice appreciated. (I do not take medication and my doctor doesn't want me to and neither do I) x

I find it very interesting that people start to question existential matters when they are very anxious. Although it is probably the other way around without realising it. I don't think it's coincidental. It seems to be the mind's recognition of it's own limitation. The fear comes from non-acceptance of it and trying to control it (the future, the past, life). It's my belief that the resolution of fear doesn't come through regaining control, but the complete acceptance that the mind doesn't have control...and that's ok. All that fear is resistance to this, in trying to hang on to control and have things the way the mind wants rather than the way things truly are.

I've been where you are Pansa. Anxious from morning to night, afraid to get out bed, to breath, to put one foot in front of the other, to have all your most horrible thoughts stream through the mind. And you know what, I made it through. And you will too.

I was thinking about something this morning that might help you. Look at your fear and tell me what it is about? I don't mean specifically. I mean is it about your past? Is it about this second right now? Or is it about the future?

If you look in your own experience, and please do, because getting this intellectually means nothing, you'll see that fear is ALWAYS about the future. About something negative happening to you in the future.

So let's play Devil's advocate. Let's say something bad does happen. Let's take an example. Say you're really worried about going out to the shops and it's icy. You're afraid of slipping and hurting yourself. so you get anxious and worried. Maybe you still decide to brave it because you really need milk for your Weetabix in the morning. You go out, anxious. Half way there you slip and hurt yourself. Is there still fear in that situation? No. The slip and the fall, and even the pain are all happening in the present moment. The only way you would be anxious and afraid is if you start to bring in a future thought such as, "what if I need to go to hospital? what if I can't walk? what if what if what if". Do you see that the fear is ALWAYS with a thought about the future? Never about the true experience that is happening right there and then.

A lot of the anxiety is about the current sensations in the body, mainly caused by being run down. The body/mind has been stressed for a long time, Claire Weekes calls it sensitization. Just like after a run your body will be stiff and sore. So look closely at the sensations in your body. Is the sensations REALLY the problem? Or is it thoughts about what the sensations MEAN to a future you?!

Hopefully if you look in your experience (repeatedly! needs to verified in your experience many many times over to sink in), as I am, you'll see that fear is caused and perpetuated by thoughts about the future NO MATTER WHAT THE SITUATION. It's never the situation itself but thoughts about what might happen next.

[Lyn89]

I just read incognitos post and nearly cried with relief. That is so true. And I swear someone can tell you the same thing a million times but it doesn't make sense till its put to you a certain way. OP, I get existentialism all the time. It's very scary and annoying. Because, unlike the symptoms of anxiety, you cannot control it or answer those questions. Going through anxiety makes you very aware of everything. Your life, your body, your state of mind. The way I get through it (now adding the very good points incognito makes) is to tell myself I'm just noticing it more. That's all. I'm still the same as i was before the anxiety-- I'm not I'll, or different to what I was. I'm just noticing it more. that really helps me, I hope it does you too. Existentialism can't hurt you, they're just thoughts after all. Everyone alive has them, even those who aren't anxious. Thinking them isnt going to change anything or affect your future. You just become okay with them in time :)