Feeling better already :)

[finnsdad]

Hi all, was recommended this site by a friend and member I believe.
Been having what has been for me a tough time the last few months, but the more I read the more it has always been anxiety that has been the controlling factor in my life, such a shame i didn't realise sooner.

Not feeling sorry for myself, am actually quite optimistic now I have identified loads of things, the longest journey begins with a single step I guess.

Got a GP appointment soon to rule out anything medical as advised, am off to health food shop to get vits and supplements tomorrow.
I'm quite a practical person so the guides and advice on here will be followed and lets see what happens in the next chapter :)
Great site and forum, very pleased to have found it!

[aprilmoon]

Hi Finnsdad
Welcome to NMP :)

[finnsdad]

Hi again, just looking back and I guess I didn't say much about myself back then ...

I'm a 48yr old man, am single and live alone with my dog (Finn)

Feeling pretty low again at the minute, not sure why, guess it comes in cycles maybe?

I did seek help last summer, had a MH assessment and was referred for counselling, had 9 really helpful sessions that ended just before Christmas, felt loads better until the last couple of weeks when the gloom came back, I'm doing my very best to rationalise it and to utilise the help given to me through the Anxiety management group I also attended for 6 weeks, I also found that group really helpful not least for the realisation that I wasn't the only one who had these feelings.
Am feeling a bit lost and a lot hopeless at the minute, so plan is to have a good read around the forums, re read and put into practice the information given to me and hope that it passes again soon.

Just wanted to say that it feels comforting to know this resource is here, and that I'll try not to "hit and run" this time, as I now know it doesn't work like that.

Hope everyone is having the best day that they can :)

A x

[jimsmrs]

Hi finnsdad and welcome

I think you're right that it does come in cycles or like a black cloud

[AlexandriaUK]

Welcome to the forum, taking those first steps can be really hard, just hitting the point were you except that a lot of the symptoms are HA and will not kill you, I hope that by focusing on the good parts of how we feel help and get you motivated again.
Do you work, have any hobbies, keep fit ect.

[finnsdad]

Welcome to the forum, taking those first steps can be really hard, just hitting the point were you except that a lot of the symptoms are HA and will not kill you, I hope that by focusing on the good parts of how we feel help and get you motivated again.
Do you work, have any hobbies, keep fit ect.


Thanks!

Yes I work, as mad as it sounds, I'm a Doorman 2 nights a week, have been at the same pub for 25 years this year, something I'm immensely proud of. It's really strange though that I NEVER get any anxiety or panic etc when am at work, the "mask" goes on and off I go ... I work at a really busy pub on my own and always have done and that's part of the frustration with not feeling so good, I know I can be fine.

My other work is also my hobby, I make bespoke dog collars so I get to be creative, that bit I do struggle with at times though, the whole "what if the person hates it" "what if it isn't good enough" etc, I can't post them some days through worrying that they aren't good enough.

I keep reasonably fit through getting out for at least 2 hours a day with my dog, I find this helps a lot.

Thanks for the reply, really appreciate knowing you read my post :)

[RubyToo]

Hi Finnsdad, just wanted to say 'hi' from another 48 year old dog owner and anxiety sufferer.

well done on the job front and the creative side of things.

The 'gloom' cycle sure is the pits - I have found a few self help books that have helped me a lot with 'those thoughts', and tips here on the forum to help with sleep too.

Also spend a lot of time out walking dogs:)

[finnsdad]

Hi Finnsdad, just wanted to say 'hi' from another 48 year old dog owner and anxiety sufferer.

well done on the job front and the creative side of things.

The 'gloom' cycle sure is the pits - I have found a few self help books that have helped me a lot with 'those thoughts', and tips here on the forum to help with sleep too.

Also spend a lot of time out walking dogs:)


Thanks Ruby :)

I haven't bought any books just yet, but am reading plenty online, as much for a distraction as anything else!

Dogs should definitely be on prescription, they are a great help I find :)

[jimsmrs]

I agree, I'd be lost without my dog!!

What's your dog??

[finnsdad]

I agree, I'd be lost without my dog!!

What's your dog??


Which of course is the subject of a whole seperate anxiety, arrrgggghhhh I hate the way little things trigger off unreasonable thoughts and responses!

Anyway, all calm again now lol.

He is an Irish Wheaten Terrier, about as big as a big Staffy but with a wheat coloured wooly coat.

What is yours?

:)

[jimsmrs]

Glad you're feeling calmer, it is annoying when those triggers come in.

Ours is 6 year German Shepherd, We got her when she was 5 months old, We've seen her puppy pictures and she was sable. Her dad was white, but now she has the black saddle, pink and black nose, light brown claws and massive ears, Her vet says she's bigger than the average female. Despite her size though, she is so gentle and little too friendly.:D

[Fatherof3boys]

Hi,
I actually feel some comfort in reading your posts & am in that age range, 49 & been suffering some anxiety related problems since November. I think you may be right about the symptoms coming & going in cycles but in a random way.
Currently having therapy sessions for post traumatic stress but have been having health anxiety issues too & finding it hard to keep a sense of logic.It's almost like living my life with a detachment from reality at the moment but reading your posts, I can see some similarities even down to walking the dog & strangely knowing it's a problem shared by a lot of people including yourself does introduce some feeling of calm.Thank you.

[jimsmrs]

Hi Fatherof3boys

When I was at my worst I used to pray for rain so I could stay in cause I knew my dog hated it as the rain goes down her big ears. But now I'm out in the rain, hail, snow anything the Scottish weather can throw at me!!!!

But still struggle with the motivation to drive though, I also feel emotionally detached sometimes.

[Fatherof3boys]

Hi jimsmrs,
I couldn't bear to go out for about a month but am walking the dog every day now which seems almost therapeutic.I'm living in Kent so don't have the joys of the harsh Scottish environment in fact we had a flurry of snow first thing which turned into brilliant sunshine for most of the day & hopefully that'll be it now for the winter.😃
How long have you had the anxiety for? Is it something that continually comes & goes once you've had it or can it be beaten for good? I just want to feel 'normal' again.Do you feel that a sense of reality changed & even things like taste & smells changed? It all seems rather strange.

[jimsmrs]

hi fatherof3boys

I've had my anxiety about 4 years now, brought on by a severe stomach virus that left me with chronic fatigue. I was convinced it was more of a physical problem. But I was referred to a psychologist and he diagnosed the anxiety and depression. I also switched to De-caff tea, which did help with the shakes.

Then Dec 2013 I was diagnosed with a Thyroid problem, and the hospital is to get my meds spot on, which also plays havoc with the anxiety, especially when my levels are yo-yoing.

For me the anxiety lurks. I can have weeks, even months of 'normality', then BAM it'll hit me again. Yes, it's like you're on the outside looking in also yes I've noticed I can't eat chocolate or anything sweet, completely gone off it.

[Fatherof3boys]

Hi jimsmrs,
Four years & you still have it occasionally? Poor you, that's a long time.Did you think that your physical symptoms were because of the anxiety or did the anxiety come on as a result of the physical problems? There's not much I've been scared of in the past ever, but this anxiety is presenting worrying symptoms really quite often. Had tests done at the docs, heart & some blood which came back ok but feel like there must be something wrong.I can't believe that things happen in my head to make these symptoms seem real.They feel very real.has it affected your work? I want to go back to work even though it's caused the post traumatic stress part of this anxiety.I really appreciate your previous comments as it does make me feel that there are others going through these problems & therefore not alone with it.Did you stop eating chocolate & sweet things because you think it makes you feel worse or because the taste has changed? I'm sorry to ask so many questions but I have thought about changing certain parts of my usual diet to see if it makes any difference too.

[jimsmrs]

The anxiety came in as the stomach virus I had just wouldn't clear up, loose bowels for about 3 months. every thing I ate I would see in the toilet, not very nice!!!! I lost loads of weight. I was convinced I had bowel cancer. I wanted to be taken into hospital so I could be kept under observation, totally irrational. After seeing the psychologist, my GP referred me for a colonoscopy and was told the virus had irritated the bowel, but no cancer. The specialist also said that type of virus can stay in the system for many months.

Then I got hit with the Menopause:doh:

My Thyroid went over-active and I had the shakes, palpations and a resting heart rate of 126 bpm I thought my anti-depressants had been switched to a placebo and that the de-caff tea bags I use had been switched to normal tea, again irrational thinking!!! went to the GP, it was a locum, he said 'oh it's your anxiety, but I'll take blood anyway' Five days later got a phone call, 'Your blood results are back, your thyroid levels are through the roof' so I'm now under the hospital.

Don't worry about the questions, that's how we learn from each other.

The chocolate thing is about taste.

[Fatherof3boys]

hi jimsmrs,
Bless you, it sounds like you've been through a lot of stress.The irrational thinking is something that I've been experiencing too especially when the stress levels are particularly high.Thank you for your replies.��

[finnsdad]

Some interesting replies there :)

Fatherof3, you sound frustrated by the anxiety? I am by mine, it is "getting in the way" of my old normal life, I'm not enjoying much at the minute, and am not inspired to do the same interesting stuff I used to enjoy doing, really basic stuff like going out in the car means that I get the whole adrenaline trigger from "what if it breaks down" etc.
I feel helpless against it, although I know really that I'm not, it is hard to even contemplate trying to overcome the anxiety through the coping strategies I have been taught.
I've had a really enjoyable weekend at work though, all that said, met loads of nice people and hardly thought about being anxious once I'd actually got ready and gone to work, maybe that is the key ... "Feel the fear and do it anyway" after all, how bad can it be, the car didn't break down, nothing bad happened, and I had a good time ... That's not helping the jellyfish that is sitting here right now though!
JimsMrs, blimey indeed, it does sound like you've had a journey and a half so far!
I get the wanting to know definitely that everything is ok, I constantly seek reassurance these days for everything, I'm single (and not enjoying it) but can't see that I'd be able to build anything with anyone in the near future until I crack this anxiety again as I feel like I would be too "needy", I'm very lucky I have nothing physically medically wrong though.
What a bunch we are! ;)

[jimsmrs]

Yes we are a right bunch!!! I have an issue with driving, sometimes I can't seem to get the motivation to even unlock the car door!!! Yet when I do need to drive I'm fine, I think I've pinpointed the reason though for the lack of motivation, when my Thyroid started to play up, I was driving and my whole body was shaking, right down to my feet and my car's an automatic and my foot would not do as it was it's told, good job my hubby was with me, I had to pull over so we could swap places. Once I was on the thyroid meds I was ok to drive again.

But since it's been fluctuating again, I think I'm a bit scared of it happening again while I'm on my own.

Glad your weekend went well, I think a distraction, like work helps.

Don't dwell on the fact you're single, just think of yourself and as you get stronger that's when you can get back on the relationship merry-go-round.