TheHusband
16-06-14, 17:48
My wife's tablets finally kicked in this weekend. She'd been taking Cilatopram for nearly three weeks without any of the good effects (instead she had excessive yawning, a dry mouth and depression) but finally she has reported she feels better. "It's like someone just waved a magic wand and made it all go away," she reported, sobbing with relief.
I'm so grateful we have these measures to call on. I don't really like the idea of taking any pills long-term, in general, but I can't help feeling I'll swap my principles and concerns in return for kicking misery out of our house.
Looking back over this particular 'episode' it's interesting to note something, which I will get to after explaining...
Back in April my wife made an innocent and minor blunder with her words, purely by accident...but because the chemical levels in her brain that day were particularly bad - I assume - it caused her to pick this blunder as something to focus her anxiety on. Her friend's mum had recently been diagnosed with Altzhiemers, so the background worry she had was all primed and ready to go. Bang, she was convinced she had Altzheimers. Each new day then brought 'proof' in the form of new 'symptoms'; she left a cupboard door open, she missed someones birthday, she woke in the night and couldnt recall a certain fact within a self-imposed time limit, etc.
In early June she was still miserable every single day, despite going to the doctors and mentioning her concern (as well as asking to go back on the tablets). It is only now the tablets have started working (after the initial period where you feel worse) that SUDDENLY ALL THE SYMPTOMS DISAPPEARED.
This is the thing I noticed: the anxiety actually created the symptoms. I suppose this is only the case when you fear you have a mental illness (unlike finding a dot on your arm and fearing cancer). The panic was so bad, I think it stopped my wife's brain from thinking clearly, and thus she made more mistakes than usual. She then interpreted each of those as yet another confirmation of her diagnosis, and got into a vicious circle.
I was trying to tell her that people forget things all the time, and get in a muddle with words every day. She was insisting she'd never done this before, therefore she had changed. And yet, over the last week, there's not been a single thing happened.
It's just dreadful that anxiety can do that to your mind.
I'm so grateful we have these measures to call on. I don't really like the idea of taking any pills long-term, in general, but I can't help feeling I'll swap my principles and concerns in return for kicking misery out of our house.
Looking back over this particular 'episode' it's interesting to note something, which I will get to after explaining...
Back in April my wife made an innocent and minor blunder with her words, purely by accident...but because the chemical levels in her brain that day were particularly bad - I assume - it caused her to pick this blunder as something to focus her anxiety on. Her friend's mum had recently been diagnosed with Altzhiemers, so the background worry she had was all primed and ready to go. Bang, she was convinced she had Altzheimers. Each new day then brought 'proof' in the form of new 'symptoms'; she left a cupboard door open, she missed someones birthday, she woke in the night and couldnt recall a certain fact within a self-imposed time limit, etc.
In early June she was still miserable every single day, despite going to the doctors and mentioning her concern (as well as asking to go back on the tablets). It is only now the tablets have started working (after the initial period where you feel worse) that SUDDENLY ALL THE SYMPTOMS DISAPPEARED.
This is the thing I noticed: the anxiety actually created the symptoms. I suppose this is only the case when you fear you have a mental illness (unlike finding a dot on your arm and fearing cancer). The panic was so bad, I think it stopped my wife's brain from thinking clearly, and thus she made more mistakes than usual. She then interpreted each of those as yet another confirmation of her diagnosis, and got into a vicious circle.
I was trying to tell her that people forget things all the time, and get in a muddle with words every day. She was insisting she'd never done this before, therefore she had changed. And yet, over the last week, there's not been a single thing happened.
It's just dreadful that anxiety can do that to your mind.