Cancer Fear - Rock my HA world

[Dolphin8808]

My biggest health anxiety issue is cancer. Every lump I find, I freak. It scares me so bad.... I found lumps in my mouth, had them checked. Had a lump in my breast, had a biopsy (even though doc said it wasn't necessary), have a lump on my arm, had it checked. It never ends.

My most recent? 2 really hard lumps in my neck. One on each side of my windpipe, same exact size, place, feel (like bones). They move when I swallow and don't cause pain. Could they have been there this entire time. YES! Maybe I just never noticed them? I keep calming myself down, since I have no other symptoms, and the fact they are symmetrical is huge plus factor and does make me feel a bit better. I have annual physicals and my most recent was only 2 months ago, she always checks my neck etc. No issues. woohoo! Score one for me!

But then I will hear stories, an employee of mine just told me that her brother who is only 43 has bone cancer and lymphoma. GREAT! Just what I needed to hear, so again, I am googling. Someone of facebook posted a pic of their friend who has cancer in their lymph nodes. Again, FREAKING!

Sometimes I get so wrapped up in the "what ifs" I forget about NOW.

I am on zoloft which helps a lot. But I watched my father die of cancer, and the fact that its so common, cancer centers are everywhere... It just sucks. I hate it. I wish I had a crystal ball and it could show me that I live a long happy life and die peacefully of old age. Man, I would be so much happier.

:weep:

[NotCool]

One on each side if your windpipe.

Ergo, no cancer, they were there way before you noticed them.

[HalfJack]

I'm a little confused by people saying google freaked them out in regards to cancer, because when I look things up there's generally a lot of info about what isn't cancer and when not to worry that's comforted me when I've used google, i guess I've been lucky! At least in regards to cancer worries. Not so much in general lol, perhaps finding a website (if you still really have to use the internet) that has accurate medical information (anyone in the UK can use the nhs one and that's been very helpful to me) and go there when you need info?

[Jennyzee]

If its on both sides its normal. Ive had a backache recently, (as I have many times before) anyways I was telling a coworker and she said "you better get that checked, my friend had a backache and a month later died she had tumors all over her spine". Ugh not what someone with HA wants to hear :-( from now on im not telling anyone my fears I think it always makes it worse!!

[Dolphin8808]

Thanks all!! That its on both sides is what has really kept me from totally freaking out.

Google I guess can be good for some? What I have found is you plug in "hard lump on ____" and the first 10 things that pop up are symptoms of cancer. I've had NO luck with google. Then I will search through pages and pages and pages trying to find the one page that tells me its nothing to worry about.

Jennyzee!!! I am the same way! I hate when someone tells me that crap. Thats all I need to hear to throw me into full blown panic!