Scary ocd

[shieldmaiden]

I am really worried right now. I was just in the car with my mom. There was a guy out walking a little ways away practically in the middle of the road. Once I saw this I tried to keep on eye out to make sure when I'd have to warn my mom. As we get closer she says something and after this my memory is hazy which scares me. I'm afraid I was too late in warning her because she saw him just a second before I said something. And the reason why I'm so worried is because I'm worried that I delayed because my thoughts had wanted it to happen. After the fact, I felt like I did have the bad thought which worries me but I can't remember. If this is true then I'm scared that makes me a murderer. I don't know if anyone can help me with this. I feel like my thoughts have been 10 times worse lately. I'm scaring myself, I don't want to be evil but what if I am?

[HalfJack]

Did your mum run him down? Or are you just worried that you forgot to mention it? If someone is walking in the middle of the road it's pretty much up to them and the people driving to watch out, not for you x

[shieldmaiden]

No she didn't hit him. And I know that it isnt my responsibility as a passenger but it's my OCD that makes me feel like it is. Like in moments when the driver isn't paying attention for whatever reason. It's hard for me to explain. Basically once I felt like my mom wasn't going to get over, is when I'm afraid I had a bad thought but then she saw him and got got over and in that second is when I said something.

[MyNameIsTerry]

It's just the OCD and anxiety making you feel bad about yourself.

Would a bad person care whether they would be running someone down? No. Would they spend time running it back and forth through their mind making themselves anxious? No.

Are you getting any help for your OCD? I remember you posting about harmful thoughts in the past and remember how it made you feel. You don't have to live like that, you can get better.

I had some harmful thoughts with my OCD, although it's I have other forms of OCD that dominate me more. I have got passed a lot of these now and find my harmful thoughts tend to just float through without me placing any value to them, I've laughed at how ridiculous some of them are.