NowFree
16-07-14, 18:10
I wanted to share my story to help others get through anxiety and stress related illness. Two years ago I got engaged. That should have been the happiest time in my life but that's when all this started. Two close family members attacked me emotionally, bullied and caused me so much stress I couldn't sleep, I couldn't function. They say weddings can bring out the worst in families. I tried to keep everyone happy and in the process made my health suffer as they rejected any good intention I had. I found myself in a health food shop looking at the strong vitamins. I bought one that contained a strong B & E vitamin. I started taking them. I don't know why... I just wanted to take something to make all the voices in my head stop. I wanted to sleep. Two weeks later I lost fine dexterity in my right hand and my right leg felt different from my left. I found it difficult to type in work, my right hand felt odd. I was getting pins and needles in my right leg. I looked on the internet (worst thing I ever did!). I discovered neurological diseases. I went to the GP and they organised an MRI of my brain and blood test. Both came back clear but I'd convinced myself that I had a disease that was hiding in my system. I had read on the internet that it can take a few years to show up. Or maybe there were lesions on my spine as they hadn't scanned that. I lay in my bed, no sleep, wanting so much to feel the pain or same weak sensation in my left side... then it wouldn't be unilateral and maybe then it was stress? Within three days I had throbbing pain in both my palms and feet. My body felt stiff. I went for baths and my throbbing would worsen. I looked this up on the internet and what I found added to my fears. My hands and feet became swollen slightly, parts of my body felt numb. I then went to a world renowned herbalist who specialized in iridology. They said there was no evidence of any disease that I just had lymphadema and gave me very strong antioxidants. I took these and went swimming daily to try to drain the fluids from my lymphs. One day walking back from the pool my whole body started twitching all over. I went to the GP and he said it was BFS (Benign Fesiculation syndrome). One day I lost power in my hands, I couldn't feel them, I panicked!!! I was in touch with the GP on the phone, convinced was gripped by disease. They said it was hyperventilation. A friend of mine told me that another friend of hers lost the ability to walk because of anxiety, but this didn't ease my mind. It was such a scary feeling when my hands didn't work. The GP prescribed Xanax. Two weeks later I had panic attacks that I couldn't control, my diaphram was going into spasms. Shooting pain down my legs and arms. The herbalist gave me some herbal remedy that helped to ease most of the twitching, they said that my nervous system was out of whack from all the stress. I went to see my GP. The GP told me to go for a weekly massage and I started Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (which didn't help). The GP then suggested hypnotherapy to try to reprogram my thoughts and to deal with the upset and anger that was still ongoing in my family. I went for 7 sessions. I was going on honeymoon to South America and had to get the yellow fever and rabies vaccines, after getting these I got restless leg and my fears continued to escalate. I then plucked up the courage to request to be referred to a neurologist. The GP didn't want to send me because of the cost and they said they knew I didn't have any neurological disease. I was terrified going to the appointment and recounted my story. My fear that the strong antioxidants had brought on the twitching and all the other symptoms, that it had worsened this neurological disease. I also told them that I got numb, hot and cold sensations and that I no longer got pins and needles when I lay on my foot. I couldn't fathom how I could no longer get pins and needles. They did an examination and they said that it was fibromyalgia, brought on by stress. They prescribed amitriptyline to calm down my nervous system. This was two weeks before my wedding! I got the first good nights sleep I'd had in ages. Once I got through the wedding I went on a five week Honeymoon Upon my return stayed away took my GP's advice and took a wide berth from my family. I no longer let them have a control over my emotions. I was still suffering from eye twitches and small movements in my hands, twitching in my legs and some tightness in breathing. My right handside still felt a little different from my left. I decided to put it all to the back of my head and my husband and I started a family. While I was pregnant I suffered some twitches and leg cramps but kept as calm as I could so that my baby was calm. Two months after the birth I got my movements in my hands, twitches in my calves and eyelid. My hands were so weak in the morning, like a bus had run over them. Still failing to feel any pins and needles when I would have normally gotten them before all this started. I spoke to my GP who told me to practice mindfullness. I plucked up the courage to go back to the neurologist, convinced that lesions would now be showing in my brainstem, as per my research on the internet relating to the involuntary movements and breathing difficulties. I underwent an mri of my brain and neck and a test to check my nerve function. To my surprise all came back clear!!! I could finally accept that I didn't have any neurological disease because if I did it would have been visible in the results of all the tests. My message to you is please please please trust in the experts. Go for tests if they are recommend but when the results come back clear believe that you are healthy and well. Strong vitamins should be avoided as they can tip the balance and mess up your system. Panic and anxiety can do strange things - believe this. I can finally ignore all of these sensations in the knowledge that I am healthy and well. I finally have my life back!!! :yahoo: I hope this helps at least one person out there. Stay calm xxx