toetsie
04-08-14, 09:46
hi there
well I don't know where to begin. well I am 18 year old female who has lost my family and all my friends due to this anxiety disorder I have. it all started during my final exams at school, this is were I had my first anxiety attack, out of the blue. I had no energy, I couldn't even get out of bed, I remember sitting down at my desk and starting to write my exam and I couldn't write my name because I had no energy and was shaking to much. I must of fell asleep because I don't remember much after that. it happened everyday, I couldn't cope with the exams, and I just fell to the ground and at that moment I was rushed to hospital where I was diagnosed with acute anxiety. I had the constant fear that something was wrong with me and that I was going to die! I couldn't finish school and had to move and find work, a few moths later this anxiety just got worse and I suffered from more symptoms such as faintness, my left arm and left side of my face was numb, I would feel distant from my body, that I wasn't there. I would have sever chest pains and kept thinking I was having a heart attack. I was rushed to hospital numerous of times and it was just anxiety. I was also involved in a gang shooting were the gang dragged me out my car and made me watch them shoot everyone around me and left me with the sight. I lost my ex boyfriend due to a heart attack from the age of 17, I also lost a great friend in a car accident, a friend who died of cancer and a family friend who died on the operating table and my dog:weep: all happened in 2weeks! I was in a bad anxiety attack because I had constant fear of dying, if I coughed I thought I was dying, I couldn't do anything or feel anything without thinking im dying. I was in hospital for anxiety for 3weeks and on medication for life, my family left me cause they thought I was looking for attention. my friend's thought I was crazy and I am left with the support from my boyfriend only. he is my life saviour and my best friend, and even though I suffer from this anxiety attacks and have sleepless night because I fear im about to die in my sleep, he will still hold me and stay up with me every night. I cannot go back to my old self and cannot work until I start recovering, its been a year and iv only gone worse, will this disease ever pass? am I stuck fighting this every single day of my life? all alone with no support? is there any one out there that can relate to this? please, if feel so alone in this.:weep:
well I don't know where to begin. well I am 18 year old female who has lost my family and all my friends due to this anxiety disorder I have. it all started during my final exams at school, this is were I had my first anxiety attack, out of the blue. I had no energy, I couldn't even get out of bed, I remember sitting down at my desk and starting to write my exam and I couldn't write my name because I had no energy and was shaking to much. I must of fell asleep because I don't remember much after that. it happened everyday, I couldn't cope with the exams, and I just fell to the ground and at that moment I was rushed to hospital where I was diagnosed with acute anxiety. I had the constant fear that something was wrong with me and that I was going to die! I couldn't finish school and had to move and find work, a few moths later this anxiety just got worse and I suffered from more symptoms such as faintness, my left arm and left side of my face was numb, I would feel distant from my body, that I wasn't there. I would have sever chest pains and kept thinking I was having a heart attack. I was rushed to hospital numerous of times and it was just anxiety. I was also involved in a gang shooting were the gang dragged me out my car and made me watch them shoot everyone around me and left me with the sight. I lost my ex boyfriend due to a heart attack from the age of 17, I also lost a great friend in a car accident, a friend who died of cancer and a family friend who died on the operating table and my dog:weep: all happened in 2weeks! I was in a bad anxiety attack because I had constant fear of dying, if I coughed I thought I was dying, I couldn't do anything or feel anything without thinking im dying. I was in hospital for anxiety for 3weeks and on medication for life, my family left me cause they thought I was looking for attention. my friend's thought I was crazy and I am left with the support from my boyfriend only. he is my life saviour and my best friend, and even though I suffer from this anxiety attacks and have sleepless night because I fear im about to die in my sleep, he will still hold me and stay up with me every night. I cannot go back to my old self and cannot work until I start recovering, its been a year and iv only gone worse, will this disease ever pass? am I stuck fighting this every single day of my life? all alone with no support? is there any one out there that can relate to this? please, if feel so alone in this.:weep: