New Worry ~ Brain tumor

[Dolphin8808]

I am currently worried about this, pressure in my ears (both ears) and a bit of ear pain (alternating) over the past couple of months, even a muscle spasm in one. Started with a temple headache yesterday. Thinking that is exactly what I have. Never had this fear before, this is totally new to me and I am rather freaking out! Go to see my Primary Care doctor next week. I am really trying to stay off Dr. Google, I refuse to freak myself out anymore then I already am. Barely slept at all, waking with the ear thumping or the temple pain. So over this crap.

Yes, I will be getting back into CBT. I workout a lot and totally forget all of this while I am, its one of the only times I find peace in it all. Rationally I think I am clenching my jaw, Not TMJ per say as I do not have clicking of the jaw bone, but I do catch myself clenching my teeth... a lot. Makes sense right, would effect the head, ears, muscles.

But those with me, who also suffer from HA know, our rational minds are shut up quickly when the irrational thoughts kick in. I can remind myself how silly this sounds but DAMN I can't let it go at that.

I hope the doc next week puts me at rest but again, we all know that it is short lived and I wonder if I will want a MRI. Costly but is that the only way my mind will be truly put at ease? Probably.

:weep:

[.Poppy.]

I grind my teeth like crazy and I get headaches from it all the time. I'm trying so hard to quit...I usually try to pop in some candy like a Starburst (because it's chewy and longer-lasting) in to at least have something to gnaw on so my teeth aren't grinding together. I'd say this is your problem.

I've never had ear pressure from it before, but I could see it as a possibility. Another very real possibility is that you have ear wax buildup, or maybe your Eustacian tube isn't opening the way it needs to which would create a buildup of pressure and could potentially lead to ear infections. That sounds worse than it actually is - it's a rarer occurrence in adults (mainly happens with children, hence kids with recurring ear infections) but it's possible, and is very easy to fix. It certainly does NOT sound like a brain tumor.

We all know the awful effect HA can have on us...stay strong and feel better!

[Dolphin8808]

Thank you Poppy, I appreciate your comment! Rationally I know you are 100% right, irrationally, I think I am the rare case and a tumor is causing this.

There are times when I can step out of the box, look at myself and almost giggle at the crazy thoughts. But those times are rare and only last a few moments, then I am back in it, trying to find reassurance.

Then I often wonder if I am really feeling pressure or if its more in my mind than actually physically happening. It feels real. Just as my chest pain has felt real, and my lower right belly pain feels real. Yet nothing is every found. Psychosomatic is SO real for us.

Thank you again!

[.Poppy.]

Trust me, I understand - I have been there all to often before!

I do think it's good you're seeing a doctor; if he thinks something is wrong he can refer you to an ear, nose and throat doc (or you can ask to be referred). If there is something wrong with your ear, they'll be able to let you know pretty quickly.

Cancer/tumors are just so bad and we hear about them so often, that whenever something goes wrong it's easy to assume it's a tumor because that is our worst fear. Same goes with neurological disorders like MS or ALS - our minds go there because it is the worst-case scenario. If your mind automatically went to, "oh, I must have an ear infection" you wouldn't be in a state at all because, obviously, ear infections are treatable and therefore not really scary at all.

I always thought ear problems were restricted to childhood but I have a friend who gets ear infections once a year. She gets pressure and pain and sometimes pus even comes out when she sleeps (gross, I know). So it can happen. And I'm sitting here right now with a major temple headache because I've been grinding my teeth..which I do out of habit but especially frequently when I'm anxious about things. I used to get so annoyed by these headaches until I held my teeth clenched and felt up my jaw and the side of my head - you can feel all those muscles in action, so it's easy to understand why you'd have pain there.

And YES - we can absolutely mentally create these symptoms; I've done that too. But again, a doctor appointment wouldn't terrible, as if there is something going on (probably nothing serious) there's likely an easy fix that would make you feel better.

[Dolphin8808]

You are so right! I am looking forward to seeing the doc next Tuesday. She is great and will work with me. I know she is going to either say jaw or sinus. I will of course tell her my fear and she will giggle and then I will follow up via email asking if she can go ahead and refer me for a MRI. I already know it lol!

I hate that letting things go is not feasible. I need affirmative 100% conclusive tests that tell me I am OK.

I hate tests though, I hate waiting for results. That is the WORSE part of all for me. Then when I see the docs # pop up on my phone, I know they are calling with results and it scares the shit out of me. What if they say it is something? What if something is found? Ugh!

Such a viscous circle we are in!

---------- Post added at 19:44 ---------- Previous post was at 19:01 ----------

And now this new pain in my temple has me freaking out! As we all know a headache can be a symptom of a brain tumor. Yea well, I am freaking out over it.

Just wish I knew... Tuesday cannot come soon enough.

[RaverNeko]

Yes, I will be getting back into CBT. I workout a lot and totally forget all of this while I am, its one of the only times I find peace in it all. Rationally I think I am clenching my jaw, Not TMJ per say as I do not have clicking of the jaw bone, but I do catch myself clenching my teeth... a lot. Makes sense right, would effect the head, ears, muscles.

First and foremost, I can completely relate to the type of anxiety you're currently going through right now. Brain tumor anxiety is the worst and it's a pain in the ass to beat. The worst part is that some days you seem to be fine and others you're a nervous wreck over the whole thing.

Now the reason why I quoted that specific sentence in your post is because it stood out to me. I went to the dentist a couple of days ago and I was diagnosed with bruxism. Interestingly, a couple of months ago, a doctor said that I grind my teeth at night. Bruxism, as well as several other things, can lead to TMJ disorder which I'm 99% sure I have now. Now based on this picture here (http://www.acuityortho.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/TMJ-Diagram.jpg), I pretty much have every single one of these symptoms. A couple of days ago, my jaw really wasn't clicking, but it sure was sore. Now it's clicking quite a bit for some reason, leading me to believe it's TMJ. Now what I'm trying to get at here is that you may be experiencing indirect symptoms of TMJ, which could be causing your headaches and other aches, :)

Anyways, I'd recommend picking up a mouth guard of some kind. They sell them for $20 at Walmart and they'd probably help you out quite a bit. Good luck in beating your brain tumor anxiety, and DON'T GOOGLE!

[Serenity1990]

Why on earth do you think you've got a brain tumour? Those symptoms are all wrong.

[Dolphin8808]

Thank you Raver! Wow, sounds like it... But I don't have the clicking in my jaw. I have had days and days of very sore jaws though. And rationally I think you are totally right... That is great you finally got some answers to your questions. Its such a relief isn't it?

Hi Serenity! Thanks for your reply. I am a big googler and when I started searching up pressure in the ear, ear thumping etc, many said in very rare cases, it could be a tumor causing the feeling of pressure. Then you read about headache pain and possible tumor. I know its super rare and a very low low chance. But my mind seems to go there. I've never had the brain tumor worry before this and have suffered with migraines for years. I think I am bringing on my own temple headache now as have been stressing over this so much and my temples are throbbing. Even my eyes hurt.

From what I understand brain tumors the symptoms are typically more neurological, speech, limb control, etc. But I refuse to look up the symptoms.

Am I being totally irrational?

[Serenity1990]

Because the pressure/pain alternates from side to side this makes a brain tumour about as likely as a lightening strike. Aside from this the headache is usually a very late stage symptom and as such you'd be very ill indeed by now.

Head pressure sensations are almost always either caused by stress/anxiety or mechanical neck issues. To make things worse the anxiety can cause tension in the neck/shoulders so it can be a bit of a double-edged sword.

Also sinus issues are one of the most common features of anxiety.

[Fishmanpa]

Why on earth do you think you've got a brain tumour? Those symptoms are all wrong.

The same reason piles are bowel cancer, reflux pain is heart attack, neck and jaw pain is oral cancer, bones in the neck are swollen cancerous nodes etc. ;)

Positive thoughts

[Serenity1990]

The same reason piles are bowel cancer, reflux pain is heart attack, neck and jaw pain is oral cancer, bones in the neck are swollen cancerous nodes etc. ;)

Positive thoughts

Cancer's next on my list of stuff to worry about, don't you spoil it for me before I've even started!

[Dolphin8808]

Thanks Serenity :) and you are both so right. Its the smallest thing taken to a whole another level due to the anxiety and Health Anxiety.

I can at times step out of the box and see how totally irrational I am being ~ but at times I get sucked back in and re-scare myself completely.

Thank you all for responding, between nodes, brain tumors, heart conditions and colon cancer, it seems to be some of the top worries on this forum.

[Fishmanpa]

Cancer's next on my list of stuff to worry about, don't you spoil it for me before I've even started!

It's just a freckle! ;)

Positive thoughts

[Serenity1990]

I was a pretty convincing brain tumour candidate. It hadn't even crossed my mind when the docs told me they needed to rule it out. The three week wait was not fun, I think that's what turned my burnout/stress issues into full blown health anxiety.

But I learned a lot about them in that time, and what you have sounds everything like anxiety and nothing like a brain tumour.

[whiteformula98]

Does it ever feel like you have something stuck in your ear as well?

[Dolphin8808]

Did they ever figure out the issue Serentiy?

[Serenity1990]

Did they ever figure out the issue Serentiy?

Yeah. Five years of working every waking hour in a high-pressure occupation whilst studying a very difficult mathematical/scientific degree at one of the best universities in the world, sleeping no more than four hours a night, coupled with serious relationship issues, a breakup, and loads of other stuff = one of the worst cases of stress and burnout my doctors have seen. There was enough cortisol in my bloodstream to melt an iceberg.

[Dolphin8808]

Wow.... sorry to hear it but super glad all turned out ok. Are you feeling better now? Take some much needed R&R?

[luc]

How do you find the CBT Dani?

[Dolphin8808]

I Haven't tried the CBT as of yet. I used to see a therapist for panic attacks who would do guided imagery and that was fantastic! She did in ways help with CBT as she would provide thought processes to stop and change the way I was currently thinking. It worked but then I thought I was better, and I have been, but we all relapse a bit I think.

I am going to look her up and get back to seeing her again. She is amazing. So you can go through a therapist or some online self help is also available :)

Have you done it Luc?

[Fishmanpa]

How do you find the CBT Dani?

Free download course HERE. (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=131665)

Positive thoughts

[UKmamainUS]

I thought my jaw didn't click but I read that to make sure you can put your fingers slightly into your ears and open and close your mouth and you can feel the clicking. Mine really do click when I do that. I have TMJ.

[Dolphin8808]

Mine do not ~, but I don't think its so much the clicking for me as maybe the clenching, I catch myself really clenching my teeth through out the day, and hard. To where I have to "stretch" my jaw to loosen it up.

Ugh Anxiety loves to haunt!

[RaverNeko]

Thank you Raver! Wow, sounds like it... But I don't have the clicking in my jaw. I have had days and days of very sore jaws though. And rationally I think you are totally right... That is great you finally got some answers to your questions. Its such a relief isn't it?

From what I understand brain tumors the symptoms are typically more neurological, speech, limb control, etc. But I refuse to look up the symptoms.

Am I being totally irrational?

It really is a relief! Anxiety, especially health anxiety, loves to wrap it's twisted fingers around your emotions. Chopping off it's hand is one of the most freeing feelings in the world!

Regarding the neurological stuff, you're absolutely right. Symptoms of brain tumors typically manifest themselves in neurological conditions first. Headaches are a symptom, but they would probably be REALLY bad headaches. Now one thing I want to mention is that Dr. Google will never tell you the intensity of symptoms. Like, for instance, Dr. Google will say that a symptom of a brain tumor is dizziness. The dizziness it's referring to, however, is dizziness so bad that you truly cannot walk around and it's almost as if you're intoxicated. Keep that in mind, ;)

And don't worry, you aren't being irrational at all! I go through the exact same thing you are, so you can always send me a PM if your anxiety is really bad one day.


I thought my jaw didn't click but I read that to make sure you can put your fingers slightly into your ears and open and close your mouth and you can feel the clicking. Mine really do click when I do that. I have TMJ.

Same thing happened to me yesterday! I put my fingers on my TMJ joint and when I opened and closed my mouth, you can hear it pop.

[Serenity1990]

Wow.... sorry to hear it but super glad all turned out ok. Are you feeling better now? Take some much needed R&R?

Well I was only given the all clear from the latest scary stuff they were "ruling out" last week, one more consultation to go on tues. Once I've been told beyond doubt I'll hopefully start to get my life back on track.