Goldfinch
08-08-14, 08:42
Hi all, I'm struggling at the moment and could do with some encouragement. I went through a horrendous divorce a few years ago and was so deep in debt to my solicitor that I had to make arrangements to pay my tax bill in instalments! All the debts were paid off by selling the marital home and I was able to rent a house for myself and the children for a couple of years and have now bought a small flat as my daughter is at uni and only comes home for part of the holidays, so most of the time it's just my teenage son and me. I'm self-employed and get a small pension from a previous job (no help from my ex-husband) and will need to work to age 70 to pay off the mortgage. I'm 58 now and going through the menopause, which probably isn't helping as I feel tired and hormonal a lot of the time. My income is pretty steady and we can manage as long as we are careful, but I realise I've been overspending since we moved into the flat and I will have to budget better. I stopped Cipralex earlier this year and was doing fine until a close friend was diagnosed with early-onset Alzheimer's disease. Then I found out that I have a cataract developing in one eye. Then I misread my tax calculation and thought I would have an enormous bill to pay in January. Although I've gone through the figures again and I think it's all OK, I have been having panics ever since, waking at 4 or 5 am, unable to eat anything till lunch time, etc. I feel so hopeless and insecure in a hostile world. My lovely partner and children help and I am trying to keep in contact with friends as well, getting exercise every day, getting a budget worked out, and every now and then as the day goes on the thick cloud starts to lift and I feel maybe the world isn't so bad. I could just do with some reassurance that life can be good again.