worried 101
08-08-14, 16:00
Hi there.
I have been with my partner for the last 4 and a half years and known his step children for about the same amount of time. His children are 6 and 8.
While we have a great relationship, I have struggled a lot over the years with my anxieties that have often revolved around them. I would worry that I could not cope with the responsibility and that I shouldn't be in the relationship as I shouldn't be having these thoughts. There were times when they had tantrums or things like that and I would find it really anxiety provoking.
I struggled through these very tough negative times have a lovely relationship with them I'm very glad to say.
However they have just been on holiday with their mother for 10 days. Now their mum is rather fiery to put it in the nicest possible way and sometimes this does seem to rub off on the girls!
When we were due to see them I felt so anxious and it was fine when I did but was really on the ball for any bad behaviour etc and felt really aware of it. They were actually fine, a few wobbles but nothing terrible at all but still this anxious feeling ate away at me. It was almost like meeting the girls all over again and having to get to know them. Does that sound silly?
We are due to go on holiday with them in 2 weeks time and they are staying over this weekend. I feel really nervous about the prospect as holidays are a really really anxious time for me and last year on holiday with the girls and partner was when I pretty much suffered a breakdown. I feel like this weekend if they act up or do something bad I'm going to panic and think I cant go on holiday with them, I'm going to find it to anxiety provoking and stress out the whole time.
Also we have bought a house and my mind is going crazy spiralling off to worrying about that and that if I cant manage a holiday what if I cant cope with getting the house and living with them a lot of the time. (Which is ridiculous as I have shared a house with the girls rented my myself and my partner for four years, think its just the fact that I would be buying it.)
I'm so annoyed as we have a lovely time altogether and so far had managed to hold off the anxiety but I can feel it building up and up and its making me feel really down and crappy.
If anyone has any advice that could help me through this time of anxiety I would be really grateful.
Thanks
I have been with my partner for the last 4 and a half years and known his step children for about the same amount of time. His children are 6 and 8.
While we have a great relationship, I have struggled a lot over the years with my anxieties that have often revolved around them. I would worry that I could not cope with the responsibility and that I shouldn't be in the relationship as I shouldn't be having these thoughts. There were times when they had tantrums or things like that and I would find it really anxiety provoking.
I struggled through these very tough negative times have a lovely relationship with them I'm very glad to say.
However they have just been on holiday with their mother for 10 days. Now their mum is rather fiery to put it in the nicest possible way and sometimes this does seem to rub off on the girls!
When we were due to see them I felt so anxious and it was fine when I did but was really on the ball for any bad behaviour etc and felt really aware of it. They were actually fine, a few wobbles but nothing terrible at all but still this anxious feeling ate away at me. It was almost like meeting the girls all over again and having to get to know them. Does that sound silly?
We are due to go on holiday with them in 2 weeks time and they are staying over this weekend. I feel really nervous about the prospect as holidays are a really really anxious time for me and last year on holiday with the girls and partner was when I pretty much suffered a breakdown. I feel like this weekend if they act up or do something bad I'm going to panic and think I cant go on holiday with them, I'm going to find it to anxiety provoking and stress out the whole time.
Also we have bought a house and my mind is going crazy spiralling off to worrying about that and that if I cant manage a holiday what if I cant cope with getting the house and living with them a lot of the time. (Which is ridiculous as I have shared a house with the girls rented my myself and my partner for four years, think its just the fact that I would be buying it.)
I'm so annoyed as we have a lovely time altogether and so far had managed to hold off the anxiety but I can feel it building up and up and its making me feel really down and crappy.
If anyone has any advice that could help me through this time of anxiety I would be really grateful.
Thanks