View Full Version : Holiday anxiety - how do you all cope?
Female healthanxiety
09-08-14, 15:32
It's so hard for me as my partner does not know I have HA and have hidden it from him for 3 years now.
We booked a holiday to Cyprus did the week next Saturday and I really don't know how I will be. I'm bad enough indoors let alone abroad!
Try to visualise yourself out in Cyprus, enjoying the sun and having a great time. It is usually the anticipation of something happening that is worse than the actual event. Go and ENJOY it :)
It's so hard for me as my partner does not know I have HA and have hidden it from him for 3 years now.
You may want to consider sharing this with your partner as sooner or later it will become evident. Besides, having a loving and "supportive" partner can be helpful in times of need.
Positive thoughts
Usually I make my own dosage regimen: I start to take one benzodiazepine in the morning and one before I go to bed two weeks before the trip. I keep that scheme during the trip and I take an extra benzodiazepine whenever I need (in SOS). When I'm not on antidepressants (which was the case the last time I traveled abroad), I resume them two weeks before the trip and when I come back home I stop taking them. Usually I only need to take those extra benzodiazepines during the first two days abroad. Then, I get used to the new place and I'm finally able to relax a bit. Unfortunately that's how I've been able to cope with anxiety related to traveling these last years. I wish I could tell you to think about all the wonderful things you're about to experience, but I've been there and it didn't work for me.
That's more or less the same as I've done Junot, holidays are tricky for me too, so I've usually visited the doctor who has been happy to prescribe a short course of diazepam to take as required leading up to going. The last trip was a girly long weekend at the start of May, took one tab every night for about four days before, one on the morning of the flight there and the same to come home! Only needed to take 1/2 tab twice while there. If your GP is happy to prescribe them it may be the best way to go for you Femail healthanxiety. Good luck and enjoy your holiday!
Female healthanxiety
10-08-14, 12:56
I have a fear of tablets. As soon as I take anything I panic as soon as I've swallowed it so that's out the question!
I think, maybe, I've been working myself up about it this week, hence all of the various symptoms in Eastbourne this week.
I even upgraded my data from this Saturday so that I can go on no more panic if I'm away.....
It does not help that I'm back to work this week, which is a relatively new job and don't really seem to be calm there, the 2 guys don't talk and when they do feel like they have to.
Think the hardest thing is me having to pretend I'm ok with my partner, I can maybe be anxious about the flight and blame it on that I was thinking.
Think the hardest thing is me having to pretend I'm ok with my partner, I can maybe be anxious about the flight and blame it on that I was thinking.
Am I the only one that doesn't see this as problematic and an additional source of anxiety and stress?
Positive thoughts
Female healthanxiety
10-08-14, 15:00
Hi Fishmanpa,
I really don't feel comfortable in telling him, especially so near the holiday. I don't want to be a burden- I know this sounds silly.
It's like i always hide stuff from my mother (I'm 31 and live with my partner) just so not to make her worry so it's the same as him....
I have a good handful of friends that know and I tend to call them if I'm feeling like this....
To me it feels the more something is made aware off, the more it will make me feel overwhelmed, does this make any sense?
K x
Hi Fishmanpa,
I really don't feel comfortable in telling him, especially so near the holiday. I don't want to be a burden- I know this sounds silly.
It's like i always hide stuff from my mother (I'm 31 and live with my partner) just so not to make her worry so it's the same as him....
I have a good handful of friends that know and I tend to call them if I'm feeling like this....
To me it feels the more something is made aware off, the more it will make me feel overwhelmed, does this make any sense?
K x
To a degree it does. That being said, if this is the one you're planning on spending the rest of your life with, it's part of "For better, for worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health".
When I met my wife, I had already had a heart attack and surgery. I was up front about my health issues (although the 6" scar on my chest would have been a big giveaway ;) ). My logic is the same. If it were someone you dated casually or early on in the relationship, there's no need to expose all the skeletons on the closet.
Another example: A while back before I met my wife, I dated a gal who I really, really liked. There were a few things that raised red flags and I suspected something was going on mentally with her. My ex wife suffered from depression and I saw a few things that indicated this might be the case with her. So I purposely discussed why my marriage failed and it was then she told me that she was suffering from severe depression, was on meds and in therapy. In the end, things didn't work out but knowing helped me understand her better and support her when she would go through a rough spot.
Obviously, since you're domestic partners, this relationship is serious. My fear for you is that one day you won't be able to hide it and you'll vomit all of this and it may be overwhelming for both of you. You may want to find a way to discuss this at a time when not so much is at stake (like the holiday). Just some food for thought from someone who's been there, done that.
Positive thoughts
Female healthanxiety
10-08-14, 15:57
Hello Fishmanpa
Thank you for replying.
I do get everything you say, it's weird when I first got together with him again (we went out for a year about 6 years back) he was going through depression and did not want to tell me.
My best friend is been the redone that with depression and gas been on meds and after 20 years took herself off them and looked into the herbal side and is now on something called 5HTP.
My partners DR wanted to prescribe him antidepressants and my friend advised me to buy him 5HTP and 3 months later I moved in and he said thank you for being there for him and he is now absolutely fine 3 years later.
I always feel that I want to be the strong one and not admit my HA, this is why NMP has been my saviour.
He knows in my character that I worry, like this year when I had my first ectopics I called him from the hospital and said oh I just had a bad chest pain and just popped into a&e to get it seen to, and they also want to run done tests like holter but I'm sure everything is fine. He knows I get panicky about little things and worry so I suppose he knows it could be in my nature.
Like if I panic at the airport I could say it's because of the flight? When I do feel anxious indoors I just say I don't feel well and lay down and then jump on here.
It appears you're going to stressed/nervous to some degree anyway so if he notices (which he probably will), you say something to the effect of "Well you know I have some anxiety and it's just getting to me is all". If he looks at you quizzically, then you just nonchalantly say "C'mon, after all this time you didn't notice?" and laugh it off. The other side is he says, "Yeah, I know... anything I can do to help?" and you know it's cool with him.
Positive thoughts
Female healthanxiety
11-08-14, 13:34
Yea you right, I will be!
I love your quotes! Yes I could say both of the sort!!!
Just wish this week would hurry up, so my anxiety will be less, I should be excited! Hate HA X
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