GingerFish
25-08-14, 11:24
I'm currently going through one at the moment after working my butt off for months to get rid of my PD and agoraphobia on my own and it has suddenly all hit me again after getting a severe panic a few weeks ago. I feel pretty much the exact same way as I did before I made any progress. I do feel like I will have to start from scratch because everything scares me now like going into town and shops, going in the car for more than 5 mins etc. I'm so angry at myself and I have no motivation to spend more months building myself back up again, though I have no notion to stay like this if that makes sense?
I've been trying to do things slowly like by building up things again like go for a walk around my block myself, then go a longer walk with my bf the next day and when I done this months ago, I felt great. Every time I had done something, no matter how minor, it gave me such a boost and it kept me motivated to doing even more things. Now once I'm done doing something I feel nothing but anger and frustration. I know I'm being hard on myself but I honestly can't describe how this feels. Its like all the progress I made has just been cut away from me and I don't know what the hell to do any more. I've made another challenge chart were I wrote down all the things I was scared to do and made myself do each thing 5 times and by the fifth time, I was either no scared any more or I was only a little scared and this worked wonders for me when I first started getting over everything months ago but its having no effect now.
I know setbacks are a part of recovering but grrrr its just so upsetting, annoying and frustrating to feel like you are literally back at square one and all that effort you made for months on end has just disappeared.
I've been trying to do things slowly like by building up things again like go for a walk around my block myself, then go a longer walk with my bf the next day and when I done this months ago, I felt great. Every time I had done something, no matter how minor, it gave me such a boost and it kept me motivated to doing even more things. Now once I'm done doing something I feel nothing but anger and frustration. I know I'm being hard on myself but I honestly can't describe how this feels. Its like all the progress I made has just been cut away from me and I don't know what the hell to do any more. I've made another challenge chart were I wrote down all the things I was scared to do and made myself do each thing 5 times and by the fifth time, I was either no scared any more or I was only a little scared and this worked wonders for me when I first started getting over everything months ago but its having no effect now.
I know setbacks are a part of recovering but grrrr its just so upsetting, annoying and frustrating to feel like you are literally back at square one and all that effort you made for months on end has just disappeared.