HIV

[loopyloo68]

My ex husband (split up 7-8 years ago) has been really unwell since the middle of last year. He had the flu and never recovered, ended up in hospital, lost about 30Lbs in weight and just looked awful. when i went round with my son, i took a photo of his meds and to my absolute horror they were Atripla- for HIV infection :ohmy: Now.... im already quite neurotic and this has tipped me over the edge. I havnt had a physical relationship with him for about 8-10 years as he couldnt raise it so to speak. i think we had a few failed attepmt sbut cant be sure --- been wracking my brains! i suspected he was struggling with his sexuality and this was confirmed by me finding gay porn on his computer( after i hacked in) Needless to say, i left him. i have had numerous blood tests over the last few years as i have Hypermoblity Syndrome and with that comes chronic fatigue.... nothing abnormal in my blood.... all completly normal. Basically he wont admit to having HIV/AIDS and i am completly shitting myself and cant face going for the test. I have asked him how long he has been infected, he just denies it... bearing in mind he is a pathalogical liar... i dont believe him.
im in a state!! really feel constantly sick with worry.

[Fishmanpa]

Sorry to hear you're struggling :( In order to quell your fear, you need to get tested. Chanced are very very high it will be negative and you've not been ill. You would have been by now obviously. It would be more detrimental to your health to live in constant worry and fear.

Positive thoughts

[Katie_cupcakes]

I really hope it's negative for you. I would have hoped that if he thought there was the slightest chance that he may have infected you that he would have told you. I'm pretty sure keeping that information from you when you could be positive is illegal and also flat out immoral. Fingers crossed for you that everything's okay. I'm currently waiting for the result of my hiv test and sitting here making a mental list of things which would be worse than receiving a positive result. I.e - I would rather be told I'm hiv positive than be told I have terminal cancer. That probably isn't helpful when you're scared witless, but it's something which I find helps a little in putting things into perspective. Good luck x

[Dedre88]

From someone who has issues with HIV anxiety in the past. Go and get tested, it's stressful but so so worth it.

IF he is HIV+ and IF he contracted it before you split up, he could (and would have been strongly told that he had an obligation to) put you down as a contact (anonymously) and you would have been contacted by the healthcare provider to go and get tested.

It's also worth nothing that Whilst atripla is a HIV management medicine, it's also used as PEP (post exposure prophylaxis) a form of 'morning after pill' after a possible HIV exposure to try and stop seroconversion occurring. It's possible he had an exposure risk (recently) and was given atripla as PEP.

Get tested, HIV isn't the death sentence it was 25 years ago providing it's identified early. I strongly believe your test will come back negative.

Be strong!

[swgrl09]

You are best off just getting tested so that you have an answer. As others have said, it is so likely to be negative ... if it's been 8-10 years since you have been physical, I would think you would have fallen ill by now. But get the peace of mind.

[loopyloo68]

Thanks everyone, he was really ill at the middle end of last year so I think that was seroconversion, he ended up in hospital and had complications following gall bladdder removal. As for telling me that would not happen. .. I don't think he has any moral fibre in his body. He is living a double life and that must be extremely stressful. Incidentally, he was living with a woman for the past 7- 8 years, they split up suddenly 2 weeks ago and he moved out. I'm not sure she is fully aware of his diagnosis...when I think about it, I'm worried for her more than I'm worried for me. I feel so angry with him that he could be so selfish.....