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jonathanT
24-12-06, 02:26
Firstly I'll give you a little background about myself, I'm 21 years old from the UK in my final year of university.

I feel that I constantly have what I'd consider a low level of anxiety, by low level I mean the kind of anxiety you feel before a test (a day before rather then standing in the queue to go in). I think this is the cause for my low appetite and relatively low body weight. I can wake up in the morning and feel that i am hungry but I just don't feel like I can stomach it since I feel nervous.

Yet I'm not sure if this is just normal since in some situations where you would consider anxiety to raise (like my waiting for a test example) I don't really feel that much more anxious then normal, mostly because I negate it by making sure I have the relevant knowledge to complete it beforehand!

However my anxiety seems to skyrocket in situations where I have little knowledge, for example the other night I came home from being forced by friends to drink in town, and while I was out and drunk I got the phone number of a girl I like. Once I got home and sobered up I realised she had sent a text message to my mobile phone. At this I just started panicking, I was shivering in the same way you would when you are cold since I was so nervous and didn't know what to do. I had to call a friend and wake them up to calm me down and tell me what to say to get the situation over with!

Throughout my life at certain times I have made it my goal to face things that make me anxious in order to overcome them. I got a great job through forcing myself to go to an interview that was scaring the life out of me. In another example a friend offered to give me a lift on his motorcycle, I did and it scared the life out of me. So the next thing I did was book myself onto a training course and pass my motorcycle license, I am not a person who enjoys torturing themselves in this way but in this situation it turned out to be something I really enjoy and its a big part of my life now.

The trouble I'm having is as a human I'm not going to live long enough to face every single thing that makes me feel greatly anxious, everything I've faced (including public speaking) has taken me over a year to overcome. The act of overcoming something essentially ruins a year through highly elevating my anxiety until I get it under control. I don't want to torture myself any longer, I want the anxiety to just go!

The only times I am truly calm are when I am dreaming and when I become immersed in a television show or film. When this happens my constant internal dialogue that I have stops and I concentrate on the show instead. However this has the associated come down when the show finishes and I realise I am me again and have all the same issues still.

Am I just a bit of a nervous person or do I have some kind of anxiety disorder? I can make the anxiety less by convincing myself almost that everything is great, I use this when I have to be in social situations to gain a temporary boost in confidence and allow me to function normally. I can do this quite well but I am not so good at blocking the negative thoughts and when they get a hold of me it gets worse.

Lynnann
24-12-06, 03:06
Hi JonathanT,

First of all welcome to the forum, the fact that you have found this site shows that you believe you have some form of anxiety. Anxiety differs for each individual and anyone can feel unsure in a situation that they are not experienced in.

Have a look through the first steps links I am sure you will find them helpful.

Hugs to you

Lynnann

Dreamer029
24-12-06, 03:12
hi jonathan,

im 20 and go to college also. i suffer from panic attacks and anxiety. i know the anxious state you are talking about though it only came on after i had panic attacks because i didnt want to get one again, or feel anxious. so i was feeling anxious about feeling...anxious. lol sounds like a whirlwind of words. also, i have a low body weight, and i have not ate in the morning because i was scared i would get sick, but a tip here is to eat saltine crackers. it gets better during the day and i am definitely a good eater, always have been, but also always been really tiny. i feel too thin now and i HATE it!!! what i try to do is drink an Ensure(which is like a protein shake sort of thing) with a meal or as a supplement during the day. right now im on a mission to gain weight. lol i do not sound like most girls my age.

Feel free to send me a PM! id like to hear about what you're studying or the difference between college in the UK and USA
Lauren