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View Full Version : really gone back down...(AGAIN!!)



candie
28-12-06, 10:34
Hi everybody,

Firstly,i,m not very full of seasonal cheer so sorry if i appear all doom and gloom.

To cut a long story short,i feel really crap again.Keep thinking i'm getting somewhere and then over christmas ive just gone to pieces.Feel panicky constantly,general anxiety at an all time high and feel really physically unwell.Aches and pains everywhere,pains in my head constantly(googling 24/7) which is naturally making things worse but i can't help myself:(....

I'm literally at my wits end and i dont know what to do anymore.Why cant i be free of this horrible nightmare? When i'm feeling ok,i dont seem to fear the symptoms as much but when i feel crap(like now) i'm in a constant state of fear,which obviously makes things worse.I try to distract myself by doing things and going out,if only to my mums,but inside my body and mind feel frozen with fear...

I look at other people and envy what they have and how much they take for granted and wish i could be like them or even wish i was someone else.Its killing me,living like this because i can see no way out.15 years on and i still feel like i'm stuck at square one with each time being harder to get back up.Everything seems like such an effort and at the minute it seems so much easier to retreat in fear than to go out and face normal life,which i know i should do.

Sorry to sound so depressing,any advice would be much appreciated..

Love to you all,Candie xxx:(

matilda
28-12-06, 10:43
Hi Candie i do know how you feel. I went shopping with my sister yesterday and thought i was seriously going to crack up i felt so ill!! When i got home it took ages to feel better.

This time of year sucks. The weather is horrid and there is so much demand on our time. I am off work and my kids are off school i just want everything to get back to normal!!!

Take care.

wendy
28-12-06, 15:48
Hi Candie

Sorry you not doin too good at the mo, I am with you on all the feelings you describe so you are not alone, I think matilda is right, this time of year is a change to the normal routine and with no work, shopping etc leaves more time to think, dwell and therefore panic, It will pass for you soon and you will feel"normal" again!

Take Care

Wendy x

tam
28-12-06, 21:51
hi candie im having a few crap days at the moment too.its really hard as you say you feel much better then bang.just remember too look back and see youve gone bad again your getting better as you can look back and relize this,you must have been good to go back a bit.does that make sense lol.we can beat this stay positive love tracy

rmlamatt
29-12-06, 00:38
Hi Candie..... I really do know how you feel. You say:(When i'm feeling ok,i dont seem to fear the symptoms as much but when i feel crap(like now) i'm in a constant state of fear,which obviously makes things worse.I try to distract myself by doing things and going out,if only to my mums,but inside my body and mind feel frozen with fear...)

I was like this for many, many years and can only say, Now is the best time to rid yourself of the fear. When it is full hold of you, that's when you work on it to say, "come on fear, do your worse to me." It will take a lot of homework, but you will find that in the long run you will have the upper hand in what you fear. Remember they are only physical symptoms. You really ARE in control. For forty some odd years I let fear rule me. It hid around every corner, until I faced it head on. You need to go through it and it will finally let you go. Or really you will let the fear go. Think of it as a gift coming to you to grow your own being.

I only hope this will help you help yourself.

Rose
www.rmlamatt.com



Don't walk in front of me I may not follow.
Don't walk behind me I may not lead.
Just walk beside me and be my friend

candie
29-12-06, 12:58
Hi guys,

thankyou for your wonderful replies,it means so much.Still feeling crap but what the hell eh...?

Love to you all,Candie xxx

candie
29-12-06, 12:59
Hi guys,

thankyou for your wonderful replies,it means so much.Still feeling crap but what the hell eh...?

Love to you all,Candie xxx

bearcrazy
29-12-06, 13:08
Hi Candie,
Sorry youre feeling bad. Christmas is a stressful time of year, we aoften have to face all of our fears at once, going out to shop, meeting people, spending time with people who we might not want to be with, spending lots of money, .....
I think everyone on here sympathises with how you feel. Dont beat yourself up, a few more days and things will be back to 'normal' whatever that is! Concentrate on yourself until then, and think positively to wards the new year. I hope its a 'Happy One' for you!
TC xxxxx

piglits pal
29-12-06, 14:46
Christmas is a stressful time of year for anybody, let alone someone suffering with an anxiety disorder. My husband is the happiest person on the planet and he was biting everyone's head off.

Things will be easier once you get back into the normal daily routine. In the meantime please try to stop Googling - it won't help.